I am stuck!

[LB85]

There is a long story to this guy which is probably not even important. However, I can't get over him! We didn't really go out but its all complicated. I knew he liked me, I don't know how much but he kept pursuing me for a year and then it all came to an end when I went away for summer. After that, we didn't keep in touch (he asked me out for dinner but never got back to me when I reminded him about it so I got angry). He tried keeping in touch after that but we didn't, he invited me to his party and I went. After that we haven't spoken to each other. However, I think about him all the time. Its been months and I can't get over him. Somewhere in my heart, I undoubtedly believe he is the one for me. I have thought that since the day I met him. I have the hope, its so strong that I can't move on. The funny thing is that when I let go and thought, he will come to me if he has to and at the right time. And that was when he got in touch with me and invited me to his party. I'm stuck (probably desperate too). I don't know what to do and I even tried opening up to other guys but there is never mutual attraction or I don't really like them and try to but I can't settle, not yet.Any help?

[cmacattack1]

What happened with him before can be important in helping you get through this, because after all it didn't work out for a reason. If you can learn and grow from your experience, it would not be a total waste of time and energy and emotion. One thing to really keep in mind though is that while you want him to be your "one", he is not the only "one" for you out there. You remember the good times you had together and you kind of make it a fantasy after not talking to him for a while, and that itself can keep you hooked. If he was really interested still, I think he would have found some way to contact you. If he doesn't feel the same way as you, how could it possibly work?

And if you really want to "get past him", you are going to have open yourself up to somebody else and give them a chance. Otherwise you are just going to be looking back at him. I'm not saying you should just throw yourself at the first guy that comes your way, but take the time to really get to know somebody and take it slow with them so you can learn to appreciate what they are offering and allow a connection to form. I think many people can attest to the person that they married might not have been the one at first and an unlikely candidate, but was proven wrong over time.

[vashti]

Please clarify: you say he chased you for a year... does this mean you rejected him for that length of time? Because after a year of effort, if you were putting him off, I couldn't blame him for moving on.

[xxazurexx]

Sounds like he lost interest. Unsurprisingly and if he chased you for a year.