is it wrong to date an ex-professor?

[amanda123]

So I took a class with a professor last semester. He would stare at me in class class. whenever I smiled at him, he would smile back. If I pass by his lab and look at him while passing, he would do the same thing. Meaning he would turn his head around and keep on looking at me until he passes my lab door.I met him a couple of times in his office after the semester was over.On the last meeting, he kept similing and staring at me and he was trying to crack so many jokes and make me laugh. Then when I was leaving , he came after and said out loud"I have to wash my hands". when I was going in other direction, he called me and said "iam going in this direction" I was scared of walking with him. So I said "bye" and quickly ran away. After a week,he emailed me to write my thoughts about him on ratemyprofs.com and said, the bad ratings on it would affect his tenure process because the administration looks at that website.But, the tenure process has nothing to do with ratemyprofs. I didnt see that email for weeks and wrote on the website after three weeks, so I apologized him saying I was a little busy thru email, he replied me a thank you email.But then When I emailed him and asked for an appointment( I get help for subject matter sometimes in a diffenrt course). He replied after few days and said "he overlooked the email" and if i still needed help I can ask him. Looked like he did that on purpose. i was a bit mad and ended up saying "I miss him a lot in email" & said "but, I could wait until tomorrow"( I was dumb, but i could not help it). On the same day, he somehow knew my lab and came in smiling at me. Then he talked to his phd student(my lab instructor) and walked away. After few emails of setting up a meeting appointment( our timings were not matching), I said I could meet him someother time if he was busy. Then he immediately replied saying "he was more free next week" and said "can we arrange to meet next week?" since it was spring break. So, I got an appointment with him and went to see him. he was in his lab said that I was late. So, I said i can come next day.He said he will not be on campus. Then he asked What time I was leaving campus & told me to come back half hour before I was leaving. I was confused if he was making me go out with him or trying to ignore me. So, I didnt go back and emailed him I had to leave right away because of urgency. he didnot respond and I never emailed him again. But, recently, I happened to go to his department. He said "Hi"to me and gave me a nice big smile and turned his face away( he was making copies). There were some people sitting in the department. I quickly did what I had to do and ran away.

So I just wanted to know if he is ignoring me and what should I do now. I can't get over him and I dont want to email him. Please help me

[girl68]

Give it up. He doesn't want you he knows the trouble he'd get into and do you reallly want to the stigma of the slut who slept with her prof? That is an unmistakable label you will get if you proceed.

[QueenofCorona]

The whole older professor thing always kind of skeeves me. Not so much the age aspect but I mean is that "his thing", conquering his student? Using his daytime job to fulfill his nights. Its one thing for a professor to meet and exclusively date an ex student if they are both mature about it but if he does it frequently for casual sex, I don't know, yuck.

[VincenzoG91]

I had trouble understanding your initial post, due to random punctuation and bad writing. Are you interested in dating your professor? Just reading your post, I got the sense that you felt like you were being pressured into a "date" with him, which is creepy and inappropriate. But your last few lines suggest that you're interested, so do whatever you want. He probably isn't supposed to date former students, but that isn't necessarily your problem.

[Kaius]

Professors dating students is very unprofessional and unethical. A person of authority should not exploit his position in this fashion.
I know plenty of profs that do it. Even female profs. It's wrong.

[xxazurexx]

I dunno. I'm reading into it that this guy knows she is crushing on him, he's picked up on it and he's feeling awkward and uncomfortable around her.

He's conveniently overlooking these emails she is finding any excuse to type to him and because he knows she has a major crush....even going as far to tell him she misses him. Meanwhile he has to sit back, smile and be polite and offer to set up dates for appointments.....because that is his job and he's a professional and will want to keep it professional. He's likely pissing his pants that one wrong move or message, will send the whole wrong message to her....

He is your Professor.....leave it at that instead of reading into everything he says, or does. You will likely be reading a lot into his actions and stuff that isn't there, because you are wanting him to feel like you do.