What am i doing wrong?

[girl68]

I dont want a girlfriend who has sex to keep her boyfriend, I want a girlfriend who has sex because she wants to. If I were to finish with her over sex I would be called shallow by other girls. I just don't understand how you's work!

I've dumped 2 guys because of lack of sex or sexual incompatibility if anyone calls me shallow, I rebutt with no, I'm horny and my fingers only go so far. I need penis.

Edit: I have never once been called shallow in that regard.

FYI take a look at some other posts about girls not having sex with their partners we ALWAYS tell them to leave to find a girl who wants to have sex because she wants to have sex.

[absolution]

However, I think it's another unfortunate double standard that's going on. I've known guys who left their girls because they weren't good in bed and then they had many girls call them shallow pigs. But not the other way around.

[girl68]

Right because girls who leave for sex aren't shallow pigs, they are sluts and whores.

I'll admit I'm a nasty, dirty little slut but I only spread 'em for my lovers and there have only been 3.

[xxazurexx]

However, I think it's another unfortunate double standard that's going on. I've known guys who left their girls because they weren't good in bed and then they had many girls call them shallow pigs. But not the other way around.

There is a difference between guys who lead women on and use them for sex, as opposed to the guy who is stuck in a long term 'sexless' relationship....
We are more likely to call the former and understand the latter....

And we females will also call other females who use for sex.....they are known as 'sluts'.

If a woman was in the same situation as the OP and found herself in a long term relationship where sex wasn't happening, I'd say the same 'LEAVE IT'......and I'd understand why she was leaving.

So where is the 'double standard'?

[xxazurexx]

If I were to finish with her over sex I would be called shallow by other girls. I just don't understand how you's work!

No you wouldn't.

I for one would fully understand and why you chose to leave.

It's not like you used her for sex.

You are stuck in a 5 year 'sexless' relationship......therein lies the difference.

[alexa]

You are with her about 5 years, hmm and she is still your girlfriend maybe she want more. Do you talked to her if she wanted somehow to be more than girlfriend ?

[xxazurexx]

^^So you think she's witholding sex and because he hasn't asked her to marry him?

If she is the type who witholds sex and rather than communicate, then he DEFINITLEY doesn't want to ask her to marry him.

[girl68]

You are with her about 5 years, hmm and she is still your girlfriend maybe she want more. Do you talked to her if she wanted somehow to be more than girlfriend ?

Even if she is right that is just about THE WORST way to go about it. I want to get married too, the last thing I'm going to do is take away my vagina to convince him to give me a ring THE LAST THING I would do.

[VincenzoG91]

A relationship might be able to survive a lack of sex, depending on the specific circumstances. A relationship can't survive a lack of communication. The fact that she is unwilling to talk about this problem also indicates that she doesn't really care about the OP, so it can't be an otherwise good relationship.

[IndiReloaded]

Sexual compatibility is one of the Big Issues. Its like money and childrearing--either you agree and are compatible or you aren't. While some life events can change things slightly, or temporarily, its fundamentally one of those things that just doesn't change much. If you aren't in the same ballpark, you are much better off finding someone who is. Take the easier path on the big issues, b/c it will only hamper your ability to work together on the other important stuff.