need advice, please read

[Rx7turbo287]

i got mix up in a relationship, that been a rolling coaster for 6months, long story short, shes married but she was plan to leave her husband, becuz hes abusive, he used to beat her, but had stop about a yr ago, but now is all emotional abuse, call her names, told her she worthless, and he told their kids that she a worth less pos, and degrading her infront of the kids, he makes her clean, and cook(the point putting clothes on him, do his toe nails.) he treat her like a maid then a wife, i been very supportive, and i didn't do anything with her for the first 4months, just listen and care for her. well i felt in love with her and before i done anything physical

well physical came along and it makes it so much harder. she got caught with him about the 5 months and she got kicked out the house, he didn't want the two daughter becuz he felt girls are weak, and the boys they have should stay with him becuz boys need to be strong like him. later she had found out he been telling her friends(female) that he done with her and he want her friends, and that he said they should have sex.

she had cheated on him before 4yrs ago, with a someone that took advantage of her situation. she had been with this relationshiop for 10yrs. and when that guy took advantage of her, he sweet talk and many things, so she thinks hes the world, and he got her a apartment and she moved out, a week later, the sweet talk guy, told her she need to go home back to her husband and hes done with her. so she force to go home,

sadly i got caught up with this, but in my heart i do not woman should be disrespect, i think male and female have as much right to each other. and i show her there's a better life and world. she knows i'm very driven, and skiled with making money, but i do not have a high paying job like her husband. i just make money with my hands, and i provide what ever it need.

after the first time she left her husband, she ask me to come over her friends, she was drunk and taking pills, and she ask me to be with her. i told her no, the only reason is, i wasnt going to be with her, if they are not over, and she was drunk. i regret saying no. but at the end, she went back to her husband, and she still text and talk to me, but she was being extra careful and barely talk to me, and she have to txt me in codes so i know is her.

i met her couple days ago, becuz her husband will not leave her any money, and her kids and her is starving, so i told her meet me at gas station, there's a fastfood place and i can buy them food, so i did. she gave me a kiss, i was really happy to see her. and really happy see her kids. but then next day, one of her son told her dad that, he shouldnt be with his wife, and that mom still seeing me. so he kicked her out again. and i went to see her, i gave her money becuz she have no gas or food, and i talk to her. i was selfish, i asked her, are she still want to be with me, she said yes, and she said she need me now, i told her i m ready for her when shes ready. i talk to her kids, really happy. thu out the night her husband txt her non stop, degrading her call her any thing, that a man shouldnt ever said to a woman, she was very upset, and she said it was her fault, that she shouldnt sleep around, she deserve it. and she hate to break up a family. she told me she want to kill herself becuz she couldnt handle it, and i was upset becuz i told her is very selfish. she would hurt all the ppl that love her, but she said nobody love her, . she told me she want both, she want me(love) but also him(security), becuz she so used to the life there she don't want to give that up, but she also dont' want me to go.

next morning she text me very short(which she been push me away for 3days, and she said she suprise that i stick around) so i told her i love her, i wouldnt give up unless she tell me to.

well she went back to her husband again, and this time she said don't txt till she txt me, she going back to watch kids so he can go to work. well later i talk to her friend, which she wouldnt tell me much that she checking herself into some help, and husband is not going. and she told her friend for me don't txt her becuz she will get in trouble.

i don't know what to do, i havent eat or sleep, i'm worried sick, and i think shes great, if i can wake her up, instead going back to that ahole, but i feel like i m throwing everything like my work and other thing to see her.

what u guys think and what should i say to her, what should i do

i send her a hidden txt so number wont show up, i said (downloading ring tone "don't stop believen' - journey (mlu)"
mlu is our love code, so she knows is me. but without a number show up, and he would think is something else.

arrrr, i'm just so stick at this, i feel like crying but i can't, but i don't know what to do, i have some money to start her a apartment, and i told her i would do it for her, but she told me no, she deserve to be treated the way she is, becuz is all her fault.

pl3ease help thank you everyone for reading.

[xxazurexx]

Crikey...all of you guys falling over her to buy her an apartment, etc. Is she good in bed or something?

Just exactly what is it, about a broken woman who cheats?

[Rx7turbo287]

Crikey...all of you guys falling over her to buy her an apartment, etc. Is she good in bed or something?

Just exactly what is it, about a broken woman who cheats?

i wasnt trying to buy her love, i barely making it, but becuz she staying there becuz security, and she don't have anywhere to go, so i offer to get her started so she and her kids have somewhere to go and start a new life, i can't really use the money, becuz i been saving for something i plan on doing, but i was gonna sacrifice it to get it done, nothing do with buying her love.

a lot of ppl view cheating different then other ppl, to anyone with the wrong/right moment, wrong/right time, wrong/right enviorment. anything can happen. but morally is wrong, to me cheating is both party fault, one drive the other to different direction. in some what way, i done it, my ex wife done it, i never blame her cheated, i think it was wrong but i forgive her and let it go, and i know it was my fault.

i love the girl, no doubt about it, and i can see it thu her eyes that she does, becuz she confuse and stuck with this situation. i think it really hard for her to decide. between family, love and security. i do know todays world security had become important then love. but if someone love someone, isnt that person will provide security????

i really don't know whats going thu her mind. i don't get why she (even a lot of woman) keep going back to bad relationship/marriage? even knowing is not going to work. and believe ppl change, i don't believe they do, i think they improve or get worst, u always are what u are,

sorry i went too deep, may be even pointless about it. but at the end. i love her, and why would i give up, becuz the way is happening to her? she easy to be manipulate, it just who ever is there to change her mind, but why can't i save her? why could someone choose over a good guy over a bad relationship? i was good to her, and never question her. even i hate ever moment for her to go back to that house. now i m stuck with nothing answer.

[xxazurexx]

Why do you wish to save her? The only person who can save her, is herself.

If she loved you, she would be with you. It's really all as simple as that.

BTW, there is never any excuse for cheating. Cheaters cheat and because they choose they cheat, not because they are driven to cheat.
If people are that unhappy in relationships, then they should leave. Cheating is never a solution to problems, it adds to problems.

[Rx7turbo287]

why do i want to save her? may be becuz i do love her, and u are right she does have to save herself.

but watching someone on the side line, is little bit differecult not to help. it is very hard.

i haven't heard from her for 2days, i guess she decided her abusive husband is the solution. i guess i switch this threat to broken heart forum lol. just kid.

just like i said everyone go thu different thing during relationship problem, and i don't believe is that easy just walk away from a relationship as easy then it sound, then i wouldn't be here typing this.


i guess i m looking more of a listener then a solution, i m very piss off whats going on and how she just leave me hanging without even saying goodbye other then asking me to wait for her, i could destory her life, but i weither walk away, may be there's a chance of her come back, may be not, who knows. in a way i felt i got played. but u know it was my own fault to get into this situation, shouldn't known better it wouldn't end well. lol, oh well live and learn right? lol

[xxazurexx]

It's not easy just to walk away from a relationship, no - particularly so and if you are married.

But it seems she has every reason and a good reason to walk away from this one and because she has an abusive husband. But something tells me that things can't be as bad, as she has you believe.

There are always two sides to every story and she may not be the angel she appears. She only tells you, what she wants and she has to justify her cheating ways in some way, so let's blame the husband. If you had a chat with him, he may tell a very different story.

It was silly of you to get involved with some married woman in the first place, these things usually don't end well and someone always gets hurt.

A lesson learned for the future anyway.

[Rx7turbo287]

yeah, i not sure, becuz it since to be there's always a problem with her. sometime i try to figure what going thu her head when shes with me. and i start to relize, we always talk about sex, and fun stuff, never about kids or family time. but is funny she always said i only have that in my mind, and that i need to see a doctor becuz i have too much sex drive, but everytime i get to have time with her. thats all she wanted to do, we can't go eat or movie. it always end up in hotel room.

actually i talk to him one time, becuz he got her phone, he told me that she belittle him, and that, and always cheat, but i didn't believe him. may be they both belong together. at this point, there's plenty good woman out there, that want a good guy, if i can run into one of those it be great, becuz i always date bad girls lol.