Confused (Kind of long)

[Lasthope]

Alright, Im honstly doing this mostly to vent (really have no one to talk about this with), but if anyone has any helpful advice I'd love to hear it.

Alright, ive been dating my girlfriend for about 3 and a 1/2 years. Met my senior year in high school and "fell in love." Since then we have had our good times and of course the bad times. She has broke up with me twice (once about a year after we were going out and second time about 9 months ago) Both times we separated for about a month and then worked our way back together. Currently we are going through a small rough patch. I graduated from College last year had haven't been able to find a job in my field yet, so right now I have a part time job at Home Depot and a lot of free time. She on the other hand just started college and has a lot on her plate, including her own part time job and an internship. We dont see each other that much (1-2 a week down from 3-4 times are usual) Also we dont live to together yet (she still lives at home) And her parents are pressuring us to marry before we move in together. This is starting to stress me out.

Then I met this other girl. Call her "Amy." She works at the Depot with me and ironically enough we were in 5th grade together about 12 years ago, then i moved and haven't seen her till I started at the store 2 years ago. Shes not someone who I would usually be "attracted" to. In fact I never really took notice of her till a few months ago when we had to work on a project together. We became fast friends, like good friends. We often go to the bar after work just to cool down and talk about out problems. Ive meet a few of her other friends and we often just hang out now.

Now here is the "twist" after awhile when we got closer in our friendship, she told me that she is in fact bi-sexual and leaner closer to being a lesbian. She hasn't been with a guy in 5 years. Now usually that would turn off most normal guys? Well not for me, suddenly ive been finding myself liking her more and more. Shes just an awesome girl, a few nights ago we went to the bar, then we drove around town a little while looking at our old houses and school, i have never felt more relaxed with anyone else girl or guy. I ended up sleeping over her house that night (on the couch and not the first time), we have never had any intimate moments but she does tell me things she has never told anyone before. Sometimes I think she feels the way I do,but then she will get mad at people at work who make fun of us, saying we are "dating" (cause we hang out a lot). This hurts my feelings, even though when people ask me about us, I tell them its strictly platonic.


Now I dont know what to do or what im doing anymore.
Do I tell my girlfriend i have feelings for another girl?
Do tell "Amy" I have feelings for her?
Do you think she would ever reciprocate those feelings?

thanks all for taking the time to read my issues.

[americanstreame]

For a short period, distance yourself from both; you will get the answer...a path that will be acceptable to you. This is not philosophy. Its based on experience.

[reeba]

You want to tell your current girlfriend that you have feelings for a lesbian? That is like telling your girlfriend that you have feelings for a movie star. Both are nonattainable. Why tell her that?

The reason why Amy is so close to you is because she finds you 'non threatening' because she is not interested in you. And if you tell her that you are interested in her, she will likely start viewing you as 'threatening' and that will be the end of your freindship.

I think the real issue is not your safe fantasy relationship with a lesbian, but is between you and your current girlfriend. You need to reexamine your relationship and decide if you want to continue seeing her or call it quits. You wouldn't be having the above issues if your relationship was solid.

[Agape]

with those 3 questions - if you do them then it will just make the situation awkward

[Lasthope]

Thanks for the reply guys. And I agree with alot of what your saying, but one last question, Should I stay friends with Amy?

[Agape]

Thanks for the reply guys. And I agree with alot of what your saying, but one last question, Should I stay friends with Amy?

Can you be just friend with Amy?

[sapha1]

spend more time with your girlfriend youll realise what a fool youve been ,
once youve spent more time with your girlfriend and you realise shes the one that makes you happy and you feel that strong connection
the mayb you can spend time with amy but without those feelings

[Applesauce]

you have a crush on a lesbian. End well, this will not