friends with ex

[xchopsx]

hi

So I met this girl and we instantly clicked. We became very close as friends, best friends in fact, but she had a boy friend of 3 years. However, I soon found out that he cheated on her with a GUY! As a friend I instantly told her to move on, but she gave him another chance. And soon after he manipulated her into getting back together with him, he did it again. She broke up with him, but in time she took him back again. He had some hold on her (i guess because he was her first love)

Eventually her and I began to grow feelings for each other and she left him for me. We were dating for a few months and then her ex began to call her and message her. He wanted to remain friends, which was fine by me, but then she began to do very sketchy things involving him. For example, she would ignore me if I call her and she was with him. She would also spend the night at his place as well. She knew how much this made me feel insecure and she promised not to stay over. However, she would still do it anyways. She still stayed true to me and her ex began to get frustrated so he broke their friendship. He still had feelings for her. During his dissapearence things got better for us and we became very committed to each other. Then her ex showed up in her life again and she automatically accepted him. This frustrated me and I guess my insecurities drove her away and she wanted to be drop the "title. This means that we were still intimate, but not official. Not even two weeks later I found out that she spent the night with her ex after a night of drinking. It was clear what had happened, and she even admitted it.

At that point I was heartbroken even more so. I began to drift from her and she even started dating another guy. After being mistreated by her ex and this new guy at the same time, she realised what she had with me and we began dating again. We were official again and her ex was out of the picture because once again he couldnt take the fact that she did not want to have a relationship with him. WE made a deal that we wont allow anyone, who makes either of us feel insecure, to be apart of our lives.

Things have been great since, until lately. She allowed her ex to come back in her life again. she broke our rule. But this time things seem to be different. She proves to me that I have nothing to worry about. She isnt acting the way she was before. I really do trust her, but again I allow the past to get in the way. Her ex is also beginning to have feelings for her again, but she has clearly stated what she wants from him, a friendship. I really dont know what to think anymore. Like they are friends, but because of their past, they seem to act like they are in a relationship. I know this because I went through her phone (I know its bad, but I couldnt help it). The way they text each other, doesnt seem like a normal friendship, and they even have fights at times, as if they were together.

Am I getting too ahead of myself? Will my relationship with her last? Why is it that she can never say no to him? any advice would be great. thank you.

I appologise for the long post. Its been a hell of a story.

[xxazurexx]

She must be good in bed, is all I have to say.

[IncognitoSir]

She must be good in bed, is all I have to say.

Something!!!!, Damn, you're gonna continue to get dawged out by this chick because you want to get dawged out. You're like the wife that gets beat by her husband but is to afaraid to leave. Except you're not getting physically beat. Everytime she goes back on her word or breaks your trust/heart it's like a damn emotional uppercut......i think you like it though.

[RdHrshyKss]

i think it's a no brainer...she obviously knows that maintaining contact with this guy leads to trouble. she's doing it because she's selfish and she likes the attention, and because she still has feelings for him. get the hell out of there, this girl is not committed to you and with all this baggage and history, it doesn't sound like she ever will.

[YouAreBeautiful]

I would tell her that this man needs to be out of her life. There is absolutely no reason for her to remain in close contact with a guy who cheated on her. If they were close for many years and ended on good terms then I would say possibly yes, it's ok for them to talk. However this is clearly unfinished business and unsettled feelings. Tell her that's not going to work for you and decide if you want to end it if she doesn't respond wellne

[xchopsx]

The thing is this time around she doesnt see him often. they have the odd phone call and see each other maybe once a month. Am i still to be worried? I actually texted him the other day saying that he needs to know his role and to back the hell off.

p.s. I love the harsh comments. I really do feel like a little bitch. haha

[RdHrshyKss]

point is that she's still maintaining contact...why?

[xxazurexx]

p.s. I love the harsh comments. I really do feel like a little bitch. haha

Nah, you are more of a MUG and because youi keep on going back for more.

My comment 'She must be good in bed' was made and because she seems to have a few guys going crazy for her - and it makes me wonder why and when she sounds nothing more than a little tart who enjoys playing with feelings.

[xchopsx]

Nah, you are more of a MUG and because youi keep on going back for more.

My comment 'She must be good in bed' was made and because she seems to have a few guys going crazy for her - and it makes me wonder why and when she sounds nothing more than a little tart who enjoys playing with feelings.

hmm. you are really good at insulting others. I wonder if you'd ever say the things you say to people when there isn't an ocean to cross.

insert sly, sarcastic response below...
annnnddd....GO!

[xxazurexx]

hmm. you are really good at insulting others. I wonder if you'd ever say the things you say to people when there isn't an ocean to cross.

insert sly, sarcastic response below...
annnnddd....GO!

Yes I would say it and because I'm a straight talking person and am not afraid to speak my mind and say 'exactly' what is on it. Sometimes people need a 'wake up' call

Judging by your post count you have been here a mere 2 seconds. ...not long enough to know me or to be able to form an opinion about me. So until you have been here long enough and to be able to judge what/who people are....., stick to giving advice.

[IncognitoSir]

I'll never understand why people come her and ask for advice and then get offended when they don't here their little fairy tale ending that they have dreamed up in their head. We're trying to help YOU out. If you wanna get snappy, go get snappy with the chick who's dawging your ass out. BTW, that wasn't an insult....

[ANewBeginning]

That situation is messed up dude. I don't think I would have the mental capacity to be played like that. I think you need to end things with her.