Typical Post-1st Date Jitters?

[Gratedwasabi]

Hey everyone.

So, I did something I've never done before and met someone off of Craigslist. I actually had put up a post just as entertainment on a boring day when I got iced in and was expecting no sort of real response. I, however, received an extremely interesting and intelligent email from a woman and we set up a date.

Now, I'm not going to lie. My main intent was mainly for sex. I was coming off a horrible first date that involved me spending a lot of money for a fancy dinner with a woman I absolutely didn't get along with (why I didn't bail when I initially realized this.. I don't know.)

Anyway, the date with this woman, I'll call K, was just for drinks. We ended up ordering some apps and had a couple beers each. It was shocking how much we connected; I've never enjoyed talking with someone as much as I did her. We also have a lot in common, especially family and career, and she really seemed to enjoy hearing about my interests and such (I would start getting on a bit of a rant and say something like "err.. I'm sorry, I'm starting to ramble.. let's talk about you." and she'd laugh and goad me into continuing my story, saying she found it interesting, and the same happened vice versa.)

We ended up being there for about three hours without a single awkward moment and as time went by we moved closer and she leaned across the table, etc. I also complimented her and she would really fiercly blush and comment that I was making her blush. We also really seemed to enjoy each other's sense of humor.

After this she offered to give me a ride home (I have a car but it's a rear-wheel drive Mustang and couldn't, safely, get out of my garage and the place was close so I took a quick bus) and seemed very insistent, so I asked if she'd like to come over for a movie. Which she very quickly agreed to.

After some good natured teasing about her inability to choose a movie we went to my place, I tried to use the ice as an excuse to hold her arm, blah blah. During the movie, which was awful, I snuck an arm around her (which she pointed out was a very smooth move, although she certainly didn't resist) but that was about it. Immediately after the movie was done she got up to leave, I insisted on walking her to a car (which seems a pretty obvious thing to do, regardless, at night not to mention the ice.) I said I had a great time, she agreed, etc. At her car I started to go in for a kiss but her body language shut me down so I kind of bailed on that plan, which I thought was odd considering how well things went.

Once I got back to my condo I texted her to let me know when she got home safely (icy roads..) and she texted me back when she did. The next day was Thanksgiving and I sent a text out to all my contacts of "Happy Thanksgiving!" which she didn't respond to, which I found a little odd.

I called her today, got voicemail, just said something like "Hey K, it's Jeffrey. Was just calling to see how your weekend was and if you'd like to get together sometime this week. Give me a call, --- --- ----- , hope you're having a great weekend!"

No call back, yet (okay, so maybe it's been two hours and I know she's out of town and probably in a car with friends right now.)

I'm really nervous because I'm absolutely smitten with this girl and would give anything to see her again (and yes, I'm trying very hard to avoid making that obvious, haha.)

Does the failed kiss and non-response to Happy Thanksgiving text mean anything? (I kind of just started to move forward and something told me not to, so I'm not sure if she knew that was my intent) She kind of just patted me on the shoulder, instead, which.. doesn't seem great.

I always seem to have bad luck on first dates; I've got an anxiety/panic problem with strangers that makes me very awkward on them but this seemed really fantastic. She's also an incredibly sweet person so I don't feel like she would have had as good a time as I think and not want to do it again.

I'm thinking I'll wait a week for a call-back and if I don't get one I'll just send her a nice email wondering how she's doing and mentioning I'd really like to see her again.

Sorry for super long post, just wanted to get that out there! My friends are no help at all.

[MerryH]

I'm thinking I'll wait a week for a call-back and if I don't get one I'll just send her a nice email wondering how she's doing and mentioning I'd really like to see her again.

Yeah, this sounds good. In the meantime, don't obsess over her or overthink things.

I don't think the failed kiss and non-response to your Happy Thanksgiving text mean anything. She might just not be the type to kiss people she's just met. And if she's been out of town, the lack of response is completely understandable. If you hear from her, don't do that "maybe you'd like to get together sometime" thing. Ask her to do something specific, on a specific day or weekend, like "That jazz festival is this weekend. Want to come with me?" or whatever. This will get you a more concrete yes or no quicker than just sort of leaving it open, like you did in your voicemail. Good luck, hope it works out for you.

[Gratedwasabi]

Yeah, this sounds good. In the meantime, don't obsess over her or overthink things.

I don't think the failed kiss and non-response to your Happy Thanksgiving text mean anything. She might just not be the type to kiss people she's just met. And if she's been out of town, the lack of response is completely understandable. If you hear from her, don't do that "maybe you'd like to get together sometime" thing. Ask her to do something specific, on a specific day or weekend, like "That jazz festival is this weekend. Want to come with me?" or whatever. This will get you a more concrete yes or no quicker than just sort of leaving it open, like you did in your voicemail. Good luck, hope it works out for you.

I definitely have something specific in mind; just didn't want to ask her voicemail out, figured it was better to wait until I talked to her to be specific. Was trying to keep the voicemail light and quick.

I didn't hear from her last night so hopefully she calls tonight, otherwise I'll start to get concerned.

Don't know why I get so anxious about these things. You would think she must have enjoyed my company if she gladly accepted an invite over to my apartment, considering I'm basically a stranger to her. Bleh. We'll see.