Advice for young man

[ferrar]

OK then, let me try asking it this way.

If you could give a young man, just entering the world of dating, a single piece of advice (or five; why not make it five), what would it be?

Put another way, what are the major avoidable errors young men make in relationships, which they then learn to avoid through years of painstaking heartbreak?

And what if they could just learn it all up front?

[Gratedwasabi]

You won't really understand it until you go through it, sorry.

1. Control jealousy. This is the most painful growing up for a lot of guys, my being one of them.
2. Don't be clingy. Difficult for men and women.
3. Don't try to be smooth. Be yourself, ignore all the stupid advice articles telling you to do this and that and this. Be yourself.
4. Don't rush into sex. Sex based relationships only last until the fire runs out.
5. Live and learn. Don't make the same mistake twice, plenty of new ones to try out. :p

[Zabrinah]

I am female, but I could try to answer this question. Sure! But, let me say that painstaking heartbreak is good for the soul. If you don't make mistakes, how will learn, right?


Advice to Young Men


1. When you are having a bad day, please do not take it out on everyone around you, especially your girlfriend. Frankly, I am getting tired of seeing this happen. Young men seem to do this and then the girls get super insecure, and then the guy has to apologize. This exact thing just happened to my friend this morning. And my other friend last week. Just cut the cycle and be decent to people all the time, whether you are having a good day or not.

2. Don't stay in a relationship just because you are afraid you won't find someone else. This goes for guys and girls. There is nothing scary about being single for a moment.

3. Don't be quick to get mad or all defensive when girls talk about you with their friends. I am talking about mundane gossip like, "He likes cream cheese on his bagels." I have seen a guy get worked up about this, like, "Do you guys have to share EVERYTHING??!" Well, yes. Some girls really do. Deal with it.

4. Though it is easier this way, do not end a relationship by not calling her back. End it like a man. I was talking to a guy the other day about a past relationship and he was like, "Yeah.... we dated for a few months, and then I guess I just stopped responding to her calls/texts." That sounds pretty cowardly. No one should do this--man or woman.

5. Don't flirt like this: "What's wrong with your face?" I don't know whoever deciding that insults were funny or effective. They are not. They are just mean.



This was fun to write! I hope it helped!

***

Author of the blog: How NOT to Fall In Love

[Gratedwasabi]

3. Don't be quick to get mad or all defensive when girls talk about you with their friends. I am talking about mundane gossip like, "He likes cream cheese on his bagels." I have seen a guy get worked up about this, like, "Do you guys have to share EVERYTHING??!" Well, yes. Some girls really do. Deal with it.

4. Though it is easier this way, do not end a relationship by not calling her back. End it like a man. I was talking to a guy the other day about a past relationship and he was like, "Yeah.... we dated for a few months, and then I guess I just stopped responding to her calls/texts." That sounds pretty cowardly. No one should do this--man or woman.

5. Don't flirt like this: "What's wrong with your face?" I don't know whoever deciding that insults were funny or effective. They are not. They are just mean.

LOL Zab, I like your posts.

Do guys really expect their secrets to be safe with their girlfriends? Okay, I admit, I was P-I-S-S-E-D when the girl that was my quasi-girlfriend/best friend told all of her roommates I was a virgin ( a while ago obviously, still bitter.) That's a little far, imo, but mundane things? Psht, I expect that telling my girlfriend is the same as calling up her friends and telling them.

4. goes for both sexes. Rudest thing ever. Even after a first date, have COMMON COURTESY PEOPLE. FREAKING TEXT IF YOU'RE TOO CHICKEN TO CALL, BUT DON'T IGNORE. Rude!

As for 5., whoa whoa whoa. You're totally dissing my primary form of pickup lines here. Harsh! Women love to be teased. LOVE IT. Okay, maybe more tactfully as in "I hate to say this but it's going to be really fun kicking your ass in bowling." "Who says you're going to win?" "Well. I mean.. you're... a girl...." Wait, that's not tactful at all, is it? Ima jerk..