Always wanting to be doiing something else while with her?

[jdewells]

Gentlemen.

I'm in a relationship that frankly kicks serious ass. She is brilliant, we've been together for five years and we still act like newlyweds together. It's my intention to spend my life with this woman.

Recently we were separated for 5 days without contact with each other, and my time was abysmal. I was truly miserable. I missed her terribly, wanted to spend time with her, wanted to do things with her that we both enjoy.

But as soon as we got back together again, I started feeling like I wanted to be alone again, or at least doing something else. Now that I've realised that, I realise that that feeling, that little twinge, isn't actually very uncommon in me at all. I feel alot more than I thought I did.

The way it feels is that when I'm with her, I have a tiny inner voice that says, "I'd love to be doing something else" or "I'd love to be alone", and when I'm doing something else or alone, I want to be with her. It's not making sense and the feeling is making me feel really torn to bits, because of how this must be for her.

If you could share your insight, gentlemen, I would appreciate it.

[girl68]

Sounds like a case you don't know what just didn't know what you were missing out on....

[red_sparrow]

lol i get this feeling all the time.

[luvduv]

One question... if your relationship is really so good, then why aren't you on your knees giving thanks to have such a girl? If you don't want her, I'm sure someone else will. My opinion is, be careful what you wish for. You may get it.

Good luck.

[MartinL]

Sounds like you should appreciate what you’ve got instead of all you don’t have. Some of us would kill for a relationship like yours!

Can I have her number?

[OldMenRock]

Always craving what you don't have is the best way to destroy any sense of satisfaction in anything you do, mate, not just relationships. All I can say is - work on it asap. It's only your own happiness at stake. Trust me. I know.

If you find you're spending most of your time crying about your lot in life, then you're probably missing the fact that you've already got a lot of good things going for you. This girl, for example. Focusing on what you don't have will yield you a very long list of unfulfilled dreams - and you'll hate yourself for how poor you are. Focus on what you have now, nothing is too small - and this will give you a feeling of wealth and accomplishment. It's a matter of redirecting your thoughts. You didn't mention how old you are, but I can only assure you that it's never too late to start loving your life and what it gives you. You'll love youself and your lady even more if you manage it. And that's worth the inner stuggle, my friend.

Google "Gratitude" and "Psychology Today". (I like solid information that I can put into sensible action.)

All the best to you and your lady. Sounds like you've found a little piece of heaven worth fighting for right there. Don't learn that the hard way like I did.

[Regnent]

Off hand, and I might be off;
You might enjoy/need your own time.
Many people find someone they like, and pour everything they have into it. They don't leave anything for themselves. You could just be feeling off center.
Do you enjoy your own time? Is you own time filled with thoughts of her?

Maybe you need to try to find a way to satisfy your alone time that doesn't involve thinking about her.

Oddly enough, many relationships do not live on the two people alone. We still often need own own time, our own activities, and even need other social activity.
I've seen people who are not able to keep themselves healthy emotionally, because they're too attached to their partner, and it's not a very pretty sight.