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Thread: opinion needed ex has turned to coccaine

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
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    opinion needed ex has turned to coccaine

    hi guys

    my ex boyfriend of 11 years broke up with me almost 3 months ago.
    I knew he used coccaine a couple of times at a concert and a party. However i have just found out (through him) that he has been useing it a lot. He had a three day binge the other night.
    He has been using it in combination with alcohol, in large amounts.

    A couple of questions

    1) he called me when he was having a 'down' depression after his binge, as he was feeling suicidal. He told me at the time that he "regreted his decision" he had "made the wrong choice". due to the way he was feeling i did not ask what about. He said he should not be talking to me and he was going to call his best mate. AS we have been together so long i know his best mate really well. my ex was desperate to know i f talked about this issue with him. i said i had not and he was noticably relieved.
    I m worried this is because he is not being honest with his friends about the drugs he is taking!!

    someone other than me needs to know as this is completely out of character for him, he has never done it before. Also he is a pilot and is on call permanately. he also has no family close at all.

    2) he said those words about wrong decision etc where not about me but if they were not, why the issue talking to his mate!?!

    I m scared for him. he has never been like this! this is completely out of character!
    he will not accept my help.

    he said he started this to stop the pain, of our break up

    but he wanted the break up, i wanted him back, he did not want that

    why is he like this!!!!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    He's your ex. What he does is no longer any of your business is it? Why not just block him so he can't call or email or text? If he wants to **** up his life it's his business. You are not his mother.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    This is him dealing with the "wrong decision" he made. It's out of character because he doesn't know how to deal with the situation. You have 2 choices. Be there for him, or don't be there for him.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
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    This may very well be selfish, but you need to figure out if you need or want this type of thing in your life.
    You need to concern yourself with you first, and if you feel you have enough left to risk having it eaten by your ex's behavior, then by all means, get involved.

    Regardless, you can't 'fix' it, you can offer support which can help him deal with it, but that's only going to matter if he -needs- to resolve it.
    As long as he's not ready to help himself, you're only asking for a world of complication for absolutely nothing.
    Green!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
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    The fact he is your ex does not mean you should not care... you might, but you first need to care about yourself and your own feelings.
    If you feel he really has no one else to turn to and you're really the last person to be able to help him out... ok.. go ahead.. but protect your own feelings and never give such person money!!

    My cousin was on Heroin and Metamphetamine for some time. when all turned him down, he came to ask me for help, even if we didn't see each other for a very long time.
    I found out there is a center close to where i live where junkies go to die. (it's no center which helps in detoxification or whatsoever... just a house with qualified nurses and doctors, who take care of junkies the last months/days of their lives). I called there, explained the situation and asked if i could take my cousin for a visit.

    It was extremely brutal (you seriously need to have strong guts to watch terrible death and sufferance straight into its face), but he got so freaked out, that he did quit immediately, got himself a job, a girl and put his life into order.
    He's clean for over a year now... and he knows that if he'd ever dare to get any close to drugs i'd grab him and get him to the place again so he'd realize how he'd end up.

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