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Thread: Semi innapropriate crush on a co-worker.

  1. #1
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    Semi innapropriate crush on a co-worker.

    hey all, been lurking for awhile here.

    anyway, the last few months i've been becoming more and more infatuated with a coworker who is married, but is having great difficulties in her relationship, according to other people. we've been talking nonstop, freely texting, calling eachother with nonsense. she's definitely the kind of person who is very friendly with everyone at work, but i like to think i'm getting a special side.

    i think the question really is, do i share my feelings despite the fact that she's currently very involved? this is really eating away at me lately. most of my waking life is spent thinking about it, and i'm getting sick of it, although its been a few years since i've felt like this with someone. just my luck that there's some sort of situation going on.

  2. #2
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    She's married. I would stay away from this one. Yes you like her a lot. This kind of thing happen all the time at work. But I don't think she feels the same about you, she is just being her friendly self. If you tell her how you feel, it will only make things awkward for you at work. But if you insist, go ahead. I'm expecting her to say "Oh, I'm flattered."

  3. #3
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    yeah, thats pretty much expected. thanks for leveling my head about this one.

  4. #4
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    I agree with Bonfire. She is married. And she is your co-worker. Declaring your love for her in some grand manner (which in this case is just telling her how you feel) will only make things awkward at work and difficult for her marriage.

    Chalk this one up to a crush and move onto to other, better attainable possibilities.

    Good luck.
    Brought to you by Dating With Devon!

  5. #5
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    Yeah, married means no. Sucks, but nothing you can do. If you try and do anything you will just embarrass yourself and alienate her. If you want to be close to her, pursue a normal friendship and cross your fingers for a divorce. =P

  6. #6
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    it sounds to me like you could become 'the other guy' I wouldn't butt in and get too involved with her unless she is calling it quits on the relationship/marriage she is in now.
    I wouldn't dwell on her, these feelings could be potentially dangerous

  7. #7
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    Me too

    I am in the exact same situation. I have developed a "crush" on a married coworker. Actually, we have become close friends and I know that she also does have feelings for me. The man she married is treating her poorly, not physically abusive but maybe emotionally unavailable. I can only sit back and be her friend and pray that someday she will make the decision that she has had enough. I truly care for this woman and even believe I am in love with her. I have told her these feelings and she acknowledged them but she does have morals and is committed to trying to make her marriage work first.

    Thats why im here on this forum in the first place. It is so hard to sit back and just wish for some miracle to happen. I respect her more for not just dumping her current husband and running away with me. On the other hand, I know I could give her a better life. Im not saying I am a better man, but I at the very least would be invested in her and emotionally available. I already am!

    Bottom line is this, even if you tell your coworker how you feel, if she is a good person, she wont just leave for you. If you have real feelings for her like I do, all you can do is be there as her friend and if it is meant to be it will be.
    I hope someone on this forum can help us both figure out some way to cope with this. Although yours may be just a crush. idk.

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