need some wisdom/advice

[northoaks8]

Hello, my name is Sean and i am desperate need of advice and wisdom. I usually don't like long posts, but i need to explain all the details of my situation. So I apologize in advance if I ramble.
I have been dating this girl for 2 1/2 years. we do not live together, I have my own house and she "lives" with her parents. She sleeps every night at my place. I invited her to move in about 3 months ago and she seemed excited but it did not happen. more about that later. We had a great start to our relationship, for the first year and and a half it was great! We were like best friends in love, so in sync all the time, helped each other in any aspect of our lives we were troubled in. Enjoyed every minute together. I could go on, but bottom line the best relationship I've ever been in. (and according to her she feels/felt? the same) well in the last year the growing pains have set in. It takes more work to make the relationship work. I understand thats how it goes. Honey moon phases end, and things will change... but I fear it's more than that. the last year has been a slow decline in our connection. Our sex life has been dismal. In the last year we've las sex less than 20 times (i only know this because the 20 box of condoms i bought last may isn't quite empty.) and I'm not a sex fiend by any means but it doesn't take much to realize that a couple of 24 year olds should be having more sex... right? now I don't know whats exactly to blame for this, we both just sort of grew distant in bed. we cuddle and sleep together but no sexual relations. and now it's so far and few in between it almost feels forced and awkward when it does happen. She's upset with my living situation. I own my own house, which I bought when I was 21.
Times are not the greatest financially and so I need roommates, two guys I went high school to pay the mortgage, if it could be just the two of us I would love it, but she doesn't make very much and I can't afford to kick my friends out right now. now she understands my financial situation but is constantly commenting on how she wishes they weren't here, and they make such a mess. and shes hates them. we've had the discussion that I don't have allot of options until she makes more money... and in my defense they are my friends and i do care about them as well(won't just kick them out on the street) and she says she understands, but constantly complains about them.
she can't sleep without me in the room, so if i want to stay up late on the weekend and she doesn't she is mad at me when i come to bed because she can't sleep.
She talks about our future allot. which i guess is normal for females. but lately she's given me deadlines, like "I have to be married by the time I'm this old." and "we can't live in your house with all the animals" " all your friends have to out by this time" and she wants to move out of state for her future job.
and the worst part is... she's ALWAYS crabby!!! she complains about everything.I can't stand crabby people all the time i can't deal with that!. when try to help her through the problems, it always get thrown back in my face, like when i make a suggestion to help it's the dumbest idea ever and can't help at all.
I've done so much for her, got her a car for free (she had to buy a fuel pump for it) got her a laptop for her birthday for school. invited her to live with me. always try to be there for her when she needs me. taken her to any show/ concert she's wanted to go to, without her asking, I try to pick up on it and just get the tickets. i tell her i love her every day!

OKAY so you got all that? that was me venting... and it felt good. i talk to her about the problems, but have no one else to. All my friends and the one-night-stand kind of guys, and they're best advice is would be "dump the bitch"
so there is good in this relationship. We trust each other without any trouble, neither would ever ever cheat on each other. she does take care of me, I m a guy and have the normal male problems that needs that feminine touch to make my life more balanced. she listens to my problems. shes loves me so much she can't sleep without me. we have the same viewpoints on allot of things in life. we have a great time when it's just the two of us on a vacation.

and here my biggest problem that I haven't told anyone about, with all the issues we've been having, I'm just not excited to see her at the end of the day, i actually enjoy myself more when shes not around i feel bad because of it, but it's always so stressful when shes around lately.

I'm sure theres more things she would have to add that i do wrong, or don't do but i don't know right now

I love her so much, and I need some advice on what to do? am i being selfish wanting to live life happy? relationship counseling? i just don't know any more and need help, so if and one can make sense of my rambling i would greatly appreciate any and all advice, thank you

[pervytoad]

i don't know if this helps but my mum gets crappy when she feels useless. My brother gets crappy when he sleeps poorly. and every female i have ever met gets crappy when they just want someone to listen to them and they end up getting advise, No female wants advise unless they ask for it. Remember a relationship is a 2 way thing, it's not all up to you.