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Thread: Is she interested or just being friendly/ should I bother?

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    Is she interested or just being friendly/ should I bother?

    There is this girl at work who I like and have a thing for and who i think may have a thing for me, and we both get along well with each other ( said by someone else) , for about a year now. I'd just like other poeple's opinion about the whole thing, given the following

    * She occasionally calls me Boo boo, She also calls me different variations of my name in Italian aswell, which she learnt in school
    * She had a boyfriend until 2 months ago. The way i found out about that makes me feel like it was a setup. My friend who let it slip,Dayna and myself were chatting about random tuff, i started walking away to my area, when Dayna said come back, so we could chat a bit more, which i did. Then my friend says how long has it been since you broke up and she says about a month.
    * A work friend let slip to her (Dayna) that i like her. However she does not know that i know she knows
    * I have kissed her twice on the cheek, which she initiated.
    * We sometimes share drinks and food
    * She recently (within the last week) asked for my number so she could "show me something", which turned out to be a photo she took of me a few days earlier. I've finally gotten her number aswell, which i've been after for a while
    *She initiates most of the physical contact between us. Stuff like hugs, particularly from behind and/or when i'm not expecting it. Sometimes she pokes me and brushes my arm or butt when walking past sometimes. Also she sometimes leans her head on my shoulders. On occassion she will come up behind me and lock arms so we are arm in arm
    * We sometimes stare at each other in a good way
    * On several occasions she has asked would i still be her friend if she changed her hair colour, or coloured her nails or altered her hair style or something trivial
    * On a few occassions over the last few weeks, when we have been alone for a bit at work, she has drawn love hearts on my hand and wrists.
    * We almost always ask each other when we will each be next working to see when we are both on.

    Having said all this, she is the flirty type, but compared to what i know, i get the "special treatment". Also a few months ago (8-9 months when she was still with her boyfriend), a friend from work took it upon themselves to ask Dayna if there was anything happening between me and her, and apparently she replied is that I am like an older brother to her.

    Feel free to ask for more info and thanks for the replies

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    Quote Originally Posted by flyboysp View Post
    There is this girl at work who I like and have a thing for and who i think may have a thing for me, and we both get along well with each other ( said by someone else) , for about a year now. I'd just like other poeple's opinion about the whole thing, given the following

    * She occasionally calls me Boo boo, She also calls me different variations of my name in Italian aswell, which she learnt in school
    * She had a boyfriend until 2 months ago. The way i found out about that makes me feel like it was a setup. My friend who let it slip,Dayna and myself were chatting about random tuff, i started walking away to my area, when Dayna said come back, so we could chat a bit more, which i did. Then my friend says how long has it been since you broke up and she says about a month.
    * A work friend let slip to her (Dayna) that i like her. However she does not know that i know she knows
    * I have kissed her twice on the cheek, which she initiated.
    * We sometimes share drinks and food
    * She recently (within the last week) asked for my number so she could "show me something", which turned out to be a photo she took of me a few days earlier. I've finally gotten her number aswell, which i've been after for a while
    *She initiates most of the physical contact between us. Stuff like hugs, particularly from behind and/or when i'm not expecting it. Sometimes she pokes me and brushes my arm or butt when walking past sometimes. Also she sometimes leans her head on my shoulders. On occassion she will come up behind me and lock arms so we are arm in arm
    * We sometimes stare at each other in a good way
    * On several occasions she has asked would i still be her friend if she changed her hair colour, or coloured her nails or altered her hair style or something trivial
    * On a few occassions over the last few weeks, when we have been alone for a bit at work, she has drawn love hearts on my hand and wrists.
    * We almost always ask each other when we will each be next working to see when we are both on.

    Having said all this, she is the flirty type, but compared to what i know, i get the "special treatment". Also a few months ago (8-9 months when she was still with her boyfriend), a friend from work took it upon themselves to ask Dayna if there was anything happening between me and her, and apparently she replied is that I am like an older brother to her.

    Feel free to ask for more info and thanks for the replies
    I thought she was totally digging your gravy until the older brother remark. That's not ideal, but she might have just been embarrassed to say anything else.

    Regardless, you should ask her out. Just be ready with a smooth recovery if she says no.

    Also.. how does she initiate you kissing her on the cheek? O.o;;

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    Just be confident and ask her out. If she says no then you can give up this puppy dog crushing thing you got going on and you can free up your head to persue someone who actually might want to be with you. Women like confidence so don't be afraid of rejection. Even if she says no to your request she will respect you for your confidence in the matter.

    Being undecided and wishy washy is very unattractive... Just get it over with fur gawds sakes.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    I dont see anything to suggest that she likes you more than as her friend, so be careful...

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    Quote Originally Posted by yellowbiz View Post
    I dont see anything to suggest that she likes you more than as her friend, so be careful...
    You can't be serious.

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    "Be Careful?" Be careful about what.. that he asks her out and she shoots him with her "How-dare-you-ask-me-out" gun?

    There's nothing to "be careful" about. Never fear a woman. NEVER fear asking questions that need to be answered or that you are afraid of the answer too. It's the most unattractive way to be with a woman. That along with the inability to tell a woman "No" when she needs to be told just that. Besides you need to know so that you don't stagnate in this limbo in your head she's got you trapped in.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 30-05-11 at 03:50 AM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by yellowbiz View Post
    I dont see anything to suggest that she likes you more than as her friend, so be careful...
    You have lots of female friends making physical contact/groping you on a regular basis, huh? She COULD just be super flirty.. but.. if a girl I'm into touches me on the ****ing arm I take that as a sign to ask her out, let alone hugs from behind, etc.

    Go for it, OP. You got this! Just keep a backup plan if she says no, as you'll still have to work with her. Ie.. "Oh, no problem! I just couldn't resist asking!" Is classy.

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    Make your intention clear to her, brother. Ask her out. She may or may not like you back but if you don't ask her out now you'll see her going out with some other guy soon. Go for it, mate. I think you have a chance.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathias View Post
    You can't be serious.
    I'm serious, yes. Careful in case he values their friendship, because its pretty much a given that it'll be ruined if she rejects him. Things happen, though, its not a math problem.
    I also didn't say to be afraid of her.

    I'm not sure how it is in your corner of the world but around here it means nothing when a girl touches you, big deal. Going by that logic, every female friend I had/have is into me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gratedwasabi View Post
    I thought she was totally digging your gravy until the older brother remark. That's not ideal, but she might have just been embarrassed to say anything else.

    Regardless, you should ask her out. Just be ready with a smooth recovery if she says no.

    Also.. how does she initiate you kissing her on the cheek? O.o;;
    I'm not sure how it happened when she was asked so that could have effected the answer I'm pretty good at thinking on the spot and at cracking jokes, so if it gets awkward, it wont be for long.
    As for initiating the kissing, it's just the standard leaning and twisting of the head and neck.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Just be confident and ask her out. If she says no then you can give up this puppy dog crushing thing you got going on and you can free up your head to persue someone who actually might want to be with you. Women like confidence so don't be afraid of rejection. Even if she says no to your request she will respect you for your confidence in the matter.

    Being undecided and wishy washy is very unattractive... Just get it over with fur gawds sakes.
    When I'm around her, i'm normally alot more confident, so that should not be a problem. I guess i should be thankful that this has not been taking up too much of my headspace
    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    "Be Careful?" Be careful about what.. that he asks her out and she shoots him with her "How-dare-you-ask-me-out" gun?

    There's nothing to "be careful" about. Never fear a woman. NEVER fear asking questions that need to be answered or that you are afraid of the answer too. It's the most unattractive way to be with a woman. That along with the inability to tell a woman "No" when she needs to be told just that. Besides you need to know so that you don't stagnate in this limbo in your head she's got you trapped in.
    Love the humour in the reply. As i said above, at least it has not bene taking up too much of my headspace

    Quote Originally Posted by Gratedwasabi View Post
    You have lots of female friends making physical contact/groping you on a regular basis, huh? She COULD just be super flirty.. but.. if a girl I'm into touches me on the ****ing arm I take that as a sign to ask her out, let alone hugs from behind, etc.

    Go for it, OP. You got this! Just keep a backup plan if she says no, as you'll still have to work with her. Ie.. "Oh, no problem! I just couldn't resist asking!" Is classy.
    Humour is one of my strong points, so if it gets awkward, it wont be for long. As for work, we work in different departments, so in a fortnight we may see eachother anywhere from 1 to 4 times.
    Quote Originally Posted by jb1111983 View Post
    Make your intention clear to her, brother. Ask her out. She may or may not like you back but if you don't ask her out now you'll see her going out with some other guy soon. Go for it, mate. I think you have a chance.
    Tah mate
    Quote Originally Posted by yellowbiz View Post
    I'm serious, yes. Careful in case he values their friendship, because its pretty much a given that it'll be ruined if she rejects him. Things happen, though, its not a math problem.
    I also didn't say to be afraid of her.

    I'm not sure how it is in your corner of the world but around here it means nothing when a girl touches you, big deal. Going by that logic, every female friend I had/have is into me.
    I do understand where you are coming from, however if i do get rejected, it may be awkward for a little bit between us, but things would return to normal.
    I wish there more girls in my area from your area

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