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Thread: Struggling to find a partner, any advice?

  1. #1
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    Struggling to find a partner, any advice?

    Hi all,

    I have this problem at the moment trying to find a decent partner... I'll start off abit about me, I am 25 from Manchester uk I have a very good job and my own place which I have worked hard for considering the background I have come from a dodgy council estate where no one thought I would ever make anything of my life lol. I appreciate everything in life and take nothing for granted believe me, I mean 4 years ago I became homeless and dossed around shelters here and there for months through no fault of my own and I was the worst time in my life.

    Anyway... I built myself back up, went through an apprenticeship, put in 100% and now I am quite high up in the rail industry. I am not big headed in anyway because I know where my roots lie, I have alot of respect for people and I am very polite and considerate but I have no luck with girls these days what so ever!

    Now this is the bit I have trouble understanding... I have rented my spareroom out to one of my friends (Male 25) who I have known for a long time, he doesn't work, doesn't claim benefits, cook, clean, absolutely nothing all he does is sit on his computer all day playing games 24/7 whilst his girlfriend works her arse off aswell as coming in cooking his meals, doing his washing etc... whilst he just sits there. He has no source of income and she buys him everything. Their relationship has been like that for 3 years...

    I am in no way jellous but I think to myself "What the **** is going on here?" It's starting to get me down abit lol and I am thinking should I just go back to being homeless and packing in my job because I had well more luck with girls back then! (Ok thats abit over the top but you get my point lol)

    I do take my career seriously because I earned it I just want to find a partner like myself who appreciates things in life and wants a decent future but its proving rather difficult I have tried dating sites for a while now and no luck either

    I am not the best looking but far from ugly

    Cany anyone help me out here please?

    thanks
    Billy

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zuros View Post
    Women are all over the place man. Try going out to parties, meetings, churchs, malls, nightclubs. And even the good ole social dating sites.
    Try something. It'll work.
    I do get out quite abit but I never seem to get anywhere with women... lol

    Cheers

  3. #3
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    It is all about confidence and cool. By confidence, of course I mean you have to like yourself, be comfortable in your own skin, and not panic when it comes to meeting women. It sounds like you are okay in the confidence department.
    By cool, I mean you have to realize that it is okay if you are not with a woman. Basically, stop LOOKING for a woman and you will probably find yourself with one due to common interests, meeting through social circles, etc.

    Good luck.
    Brought to you by Dating With Devon!

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    Quote Originally Posted by devonbrown View Post
    It is all about confidence and cool. By confidence, of course I mean you have to like yourself, be comfortable in your own skin, and not panic when it comes to meeting women. It sounds like you are okay in the confidence department.
    By cool, I mean you have to realize that it is okay if you are not with a woman. Basically, stop LOOKING for a woman and you will probably find yourself with one due to common interests, meeting through social circles, etc.

    Good luck.
    Devon you are not the first person to say that you know... I should stop looking and I prob will have more luck. Cheers

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    Your friend got lucky and found a girl that has no self respect or self esteem.

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    I am begging to think that myself, it's hard sitting back and watching it believe me. He is my mate no matter what and to be honest his relationship is none of my business but sometimes I feel like saying to her what are you thinking? I have had girlfriends in the past who have been quite good looking and broke up with them because they are bone idle. He doesn't realise what he has got. Cheers

  7. #7
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    its happened to me 2 times, when i gave up or was just not interested anymore i was either hooked up or someone found me. i will say women are not use to a domesticated man. i know this. it scared them i feel. i my self have been on my own awhile now, have my own home and stuff also. its clean too! i never make it dirty i just sleep there basicly.

    the confidenace part is alot of it. some people have lots, some dont. if you dont have alot ya gotta force yaself to do somthing. also ive learned if there is any invite for anything, reguardless if a man or woman invites you to somthing, go. ive run into old friends that way. when i was 25 i was in a major rut. nicer bars could help also, go out to eat hang, do it nuff people notice ya or ya notice them.

    hope ive helped.

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    Quote Originally Posted by oldskool83 View Post
    its happened to me 2 times, when i gave up or was just not interested anymore i was either hooked up or someone found me. i will say women are not use to a domesticated man. i know this. it scared them i feel. i my self have been on my own awhile now, have my own home and stuff also. its clean too! i never make it dirty i just sleep there basicly.

    the confidenace part is alot of it. some people have lots, some dont. if you dont have alot ya gotta force yaself to do somthing. also ive learned if there is any invite for anything, reguardless if a man or woman invites you to somthing, go. ive run into old friends that way. when i was 25 i was in a major rut. nicer bars could help also, go out to eat hang, do it nuff people notice ya or ya notice them.

    hope ive helped.
    Very similar then, I am a very tidy person and my home is my castle as the say like many of us. I don't want to be run about after and waited on hand and foot, i'd like a nice equal relationship and like you say maybe alot of women aren't used to that. I try to get out quite abit, well at weekends anyway... I do chat to quite a few girls but quite alot seem to be taken by idiots Cheers

  9. #9
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    Your problem is one or or both of these things:

    1- You are attracted to women who are out of your range, looks-wise.

    2- You don't do things that put you in repeated contact with a variety of women.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by ConniptionFit View Post
    Your problem is one or or both of these things:

    1- You are attracted to women who are out of your range, looks-wise.

    2- You don't do things that put you in repeated contact with a variety of women.
    Excellent comment there, possibly some girls are out my range looks wise. I used to go with good looking girls when I was younger but leared looks aren't everything. These days I am attracted to girls who want to do well in life and appreciate things.

    Looks wise I aint special in anyway I have a nice appartment and a $70,000 a year job, did have a brand new M3 BMW but it was unessasary because I live 5 mins from work so I sold it. I just wish women looked at me like I look at them... I wouldn't live with Pam anderson if she sat in all day on the comp, she would be right out the door!!

    Point number 2 I totally agree with I go out once a week because I work nights mostly, if I could get out more I believe I could have more of a chance with women.

    Thanks for your input.

  11. #11
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    Cupid i have to agree you run in to women where you want to get to know a girl and then you ask and they are taken by an complete idiot who doesn't give a toss about her. Getting girls isn't a problem but the problem is the right one. Dude hang in there. Patience is a virtue pal. Goodluck

  12. #12
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    Try taking a cooking class or join a garden club to meet women. If you share common interests a connection might be more likely. Some women are fickle and seem to like the bad boy type. There is someone good out there for you. Just enjoy your life and health right now. Don't give up.

  13. #13
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    try plentoffish
    I had quite a few dates through the website.

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