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Thread: Revenge in love ? Please help me i'm so furious now

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    Revenge in love ? Please help me i'm so furious now

    Here's the story. I liked her, she liked me but she had a boyfriend. I told her we couldn't be a couple unless u broke up. She said she loved me and didn't love the guy so she decided to broke up. However, she lied and didn't. After 1 month struggling, she finally broke up. And now she dumps me to come back to the guy. I was treated like ... I want to revenge . Make them suffer. I know it's not right but i'm so furious. What should I do ?

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    My heart is broken now. I care about nothing. I hoped to change her mind cuz' she said it was my fault that she broke up. But now I know the truth. I know I should let it go but... so hard

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    So you get revenge. Then what?

    You've ruined two people's lives who really haven't done anything wrong, and you live with that guilt for a long time.

    What's the upside?

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    If you take the high road and stay classy, that will hurt her even more than sinking to her level and "getting revenge". She will look at you and think "wow, I made a big mistake".

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    Why haven't they done anything wrong? she broke my heart, treated me like a toy. Now she doesn't want to play it anymore, throw it away. SHe was the one who jumped into me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simonsaysyes View Post
    If you take the high road and stay classy, that will hurt her even more than sinking to her level and "getting revenge". She will look at you and think "wow, I made a big mistake".
    How can I stand it when see they are together. She and I go to the same university. How can I take it

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    Because attempts at revenge make you look weak, pathetic, needy.

    Rise above it, put on a brave, confident face and don't bat an eyelid at either of them.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathias View Post
    So you get revenge. Then what?

    You've ruined two people's lives who really haven't done anything wrong, and you live with that guilt for a long time.

    What's the upside?
    It's kind of a long story. She and I were best friends and dancepartner. Then she asked me to come to her house practice and I felt for her during that time. SHe made me food, teased me, flirted me, made me carry her on her back. And then come to this

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    Living well is the best revenge. Forget them and move on with your life. Leave them to their clearly dysfunctional relationship so they can torment each other.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

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    Quote Originally Posted by elves235 View Post
    Why haven't they done anything wrong? she broke my heart, treated me like a toy. Now she doesn't want to play it anymore, throw it away. SHe was the one who jumped into me.
    Learn a lesson why don't you? If you had stayed away from her because she had a boyfriend already and you shouldn't have interfered, then you wouldn't have confused her and she would have never fooled around with you. You enabled her to be a skank. She has no personal or relationship boundaries if she would allow herself to be a skank. Her punishiment will be in her karma. It's not your job to punish. It is your job to learn the lesson and try to be the best person that you can be. Seeking revenge for something that you DID TO YOURSELF (because you tried to steal her away from him) is not being the best person you can be.

    The outcome of this mess is your Karma (punishment) for honing in on some other guys chick.

    Now, forgive yourself for your mistake. Forgive her for she is a skank and doesn't know any better if she is skanky because she never learns a lesson because her bf enbles her by taking her back even when she's cheated. Forget everything about her except the lesson this fiasco was meant to teach you.

    People still in a relationship have much,much unfinished baggage and you shouldn't think that you're so great that you can make them forget everything they need to process. Google "Rebound Relationship" and educate yourself.
    Last edited by Wakeup; 18-06-11 at 12:45 AM. Reason: sentence structure.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by VincenzoG91 View Post
    Living well is the best revenge. Forget them and move on with your life. Leave them to their clearly dysfunctional relationship so they can torment each other.
    Well i'm kind of angry now sad too. Would revenge make me feel better ? I could somehow make them break up.
    Another question, why it is clearly dysfunctional relationship ?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Learn a lesson why don't you? If you had stayed away from her because she had a boyfriend already and you shouldn't have interfered, then you wouldn't have confused her and she would have never fooled around with you. You enabled her to be a skank. She has no personal or relationship boundaries if she would allow herself to be a skank. Her punishiment will be in her karma. It's not your job to punish. It is your job to learn the lesson and try to be the best person that you can be. Seeking revenge for something that you DID TO YOURSELF (because you tried to steal her away from him) is not being the best person you can be.

    The outcome of this mess is your Karma (punishment) for honing in on some other guys chick.

    Now, forgive yourself for your mistake. Fforgive her for she is a skank and doesn't know any better if she is skanky because she never learns a lesson because her bf enbles her by taking her back even when she's a cheated. Forget everything about her except the lesson this fiasco was meant to teach you.

    People still in a relationship have much,much unfinished baggage and you shouldn't think that you're so great that you can make them forget everything they need to process. Google "Rebound Relationship" and educate yourself.
    You realize that you can reply in a tone other than anger once in a while, right?

    Some people need a wakeup call. Others need to be talked to in a different way.

    Someone that's already pissed off isn't going to respond to angry rantings.

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    Quote Originally Posted by elves235 View Post
    It's kind of a long story. She and I were best friends and dancepartner. Then she asked me to come to her house practice and I felt for her during that time. SHe made me food, teased me, flirted me, made me carry her on her back. And then come to this
    You didn't actually answer my question.

    Can you try again?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathias View Post
    You didn't actually answer my question.

    Can you try again?
    Sorry . I was furious and I wanted to do something to ease my pain. I know it's wrong too. however, I still want to.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Learn a lesson why don't you? If you had stayed away from her because she had a boyfriend already and you shouldn't have interfered, then you wouldn't have confused her and she would have never fooled around with you. You enabled her to be a skank. She has no personal or relationship boundaries if she would allow herself to be a skank. Her punishiment will be in her karma. It's not your job to punish. It is your job to learn the lesson and try to be the best person that you can be. Seeking revenge for something that you DID TO YOURSELF (because you tried to steal her away from him) is not being the best person you can be.

    The outcome of this mess is your Karma (punishment) for honing in on some other guys chick.

    Now, forgive yourself for your mistake. Forgive her for she is a skank and doesn't know any better if she is skanky because she never learns a lesson because her bf enbles her by taking her back even when she's cheated. Forget everything about her except the lesson this fiasco was meant to teach you.

    People still in a relationship have much,much unfinished baggage and you shouldn't think that you're so great that you can make them forget everything they need to process. Google "Rebound Relationship" and educate yourself.
    I have learned. Thank you for your reply. BUt she was the one who started it. I had no intend to love her in the past but u never know who u gonna love. I guess this part is my fault. Somehow she made a bigger mistake too. The best solution is to let it go right ? Then I have learned something and make me a better man ?

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