Please tell me whose problem is this ?

[bala2111]

Hi,
Am in a crucial stage of in my relationship. Following are the brief explanation of my problem. Timely suggestions and opinions are very much appreciated.

It has been one year since me and my girl friend started a relationship. This is the second relationship for both of us. She kept having thoughts of her ex boy friend and kept comparing me with him from the beginning. I used to cry like anything and felt very depressed due to her stubborn activities towards me.

She compares my education, my status, my character and my everything with her ex boy friend.

One day I felt like making out with her and asked her openly. But she stood stubborn as usual and treated me so badly for asking a make out. I too became very bad and compelled her due to anger. From that day she stared comparing me even more with her ex boy friend.

She has hundreds of boys as friends and kept irritating me by talking to them. She don’t care me too much, didn’t shown much interest, didn’t gave any importance in her life. When I asked her openly why she s doing such things, she answered that she already loved a person too deeply and couldn’t feel the same with me and kept torturing me by having her ex boy friend in mind.

We were together only for about 50 days in this 1+ year relationship. After that she went to her native and we continued our relationship as a distant relationship.
I missed her too much all those days and even begged her for a single meeting but she stood stubborn that i shouldn't come to meet her and she will not come to meet me too. One day she came to know that her ex boy friend met with an accident. She was telling that to me and said she s going to mail him. I said not to mail him and the fight between me and her started again. To end up the fight she agreed to meet me once that too after 8 months of making me cry for meeting. And we met once in this whole 300+ days of separation.

She blames me that am so cheap to ask for a make out with her and that is the reason she never do anything I ask. She didn’t even introduced me to any of her friends and kept our relationship fully secret to everyone around because she don’t feel any proud in introducing me to her friends. So I started hating her friends and asked her to leave her friends or leave me. She denied for everything and opened a facebook account with all 120+ boys as friends and stopped showing much attention to me as she keeps her busy chatting with friends. When i asked her for registering our marriage also she is denying by telling reasons.

According to her, everything else expect me are important and according to me she is important than everything else.




I kept her as a most important part of my life and did everything i can to secure her and marry her soon. But she dont respect my feelings, she insults me that i dont have proper education.Recently while fighting on phone she switched off her phone(she always do that) so i called her as a ***** out of anger. and when i spoke bad about her friends(boys) she called me 'Son of a *****' and abused me badly just for the sake of her friends.

I want to know who is wrong as am confused. Is it me who is over possessive and paranoid to her or she s stubborn and don’t have any love for me ?

[steviej]

Are you serious?

The girl has no interest in you! Why would you want to marry someone who quite openly has no respect for you, doesn't want to touch you, is still in love with her ex and won't even tell anyone about you!

Gather up whats left of your dignity, walk away and find a girl who might actually have feelings towards you.

[kageri]

I'd say she's using you but she's not even doing that. She has so little use and emotion for you she doesn't even want to see you. Why are you bothering with her? She's never going to love you or create a happy relationship. She's just going to abuse your feelings until she finds someone she wants to start up a more serious relationship with if she hasn't already. Generally when a girl doesn't want to see you and hardly talks to you for 300+ days she's hoping you'll go away if ignored enough and is often already dating someone else.

[bulrush]

She is wrong to treat you so badly. You should find someone who likes you for yourself. She sounds very immature.

[HeartIsAching]

You're both engaging in abusive behaviors. Drop her and find a girl local to you... one that's interested in you. This one isn't.