Help needed!

[lostandlonely]

I am a 26 year old female. I was with a man for 6 years and last July we got engaged dispite mine and his unhappiness. We ended things in April but only after trying several times to communicate how unhappy I was and how I needed some support from him. After we broke up, I was still unhappy. I met someone a short time later who gave me the world. He was caring, understanding, he communicated with me, he made me feel amazing. When he looked into my eyes I felt it in every inch of my body! He gave me chills just by saying my name. We fell in love.

I communicated the fact that I could not start a commited relationship with him because my heart wasnt ready for it but I also expressed that I was not in any way shape or form dating anybody else. But he wanted more from me. I wanted to do things different this time around. I wanted to spend every second with him but yet I knew that was a recipe for disaster. I did everything in my power to make the relationship succeed. He said he would never give up on me, he said he wanted me for good. So I figured we were fine. Next thing I know he is distant, hard to get a hold of, and very short when we did speak. I knew there was somebody else in the picture. I was CRUSHED!

In the meantime, I went on a few dates with the man I was engaged to. We started communicating finally, we are starting to get what we need from eachother and moving in a good direction, but I still don't have the feelings, the love, the passion, the excitement that i want. We have been taking it slow and we realize that if we do start a relationship, then the old one is the past and now we are looking forward. But I don't know if its a good idea or a bad idea to go down that road again... Oh and did I mention that his mother is crazy and tried to plan my whole wedding from the colors to the bridesmaids and he did nothing to stop her? Thats a whole other story...

My issue now is the other man has my heart. He wants to be with me only if I can commit and I cannot at this point, but I love every ounce of his being. I am lost, lonely, and afraid I will lose both of them and then I will have nothing. I would like a little advice, considering I cannot tell anybody about what is going on in my world. Im not asking you all who I should choose, just advice on how to deal with this. It is affecting my everyday life and I can't take it anymore...

[IncognitoSir]

You're not ready to commit so their goes guy number 2. Him distancing himself is a protective measure. He's looking for commitment and you're unavailable. Nobodies fault but that's your lost. Your ex, hell, he's your ex for a good reason right. To think that he's changed much in such a short span of time.......highly unlikely. Sounds like you two just aren't meant for one another. You're not ready to be with either, you jump from one to another, back and forth. How about you try being single and decide what you want, allow yourself to heal before you jump into another relationship.