Need advice about a flaky female i was thinking of pursuing

[Bottlefed95z]

Copying from another forum (was an automotive forum, which gave me ZERO good advice, go figure lol)

Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Little run down on the situation

Mutual friend introduces us.
She freiend requests me on FB
We chat here and there for a few weeks
SHE asks me out to lunch
We meet @ ihop for coffee and talk for a couple hours
Things go well (at least I think so)
She gives me her number (i doint ask)
We start texting
I ask her to dinner, she says "Yes please!! I would love to go to dinner" (exact words)
We make a date for yesterday, she has to reschedule for tonight
She sends me a text around 9am saying good morning etc..
Another text at 4 asking if we are still good for dinner
I say yep, she says where shall we go, and i say this sushi joint (she said she loves sushi when we were at ihop)


Zero reply, nothing back. Was completely stood up..

Now women, I am confused here.... She is the one who initiated everything and ASKED me out, then she flakes on me today without zero explination....
I haven't nor do i plan on contacting her. I have to much going on in my life to worry/waste time over a flakey date. If she does call/text no clue what to say besides I dont play games and im not to keen on wasting my time with someone who has issues communicating/following through.


Thoughts?
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Ok, she just made contact and said

"dietsnapple007! Please forgive me? and good morning!"

Thoughts on response?
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Response im thinking about

"reason being...?? Look if you dont want to do dinner or w/e then just say so, I have no desire to waste my time playing games with anyone who is blatantly disrespectful ."
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Sent this text after she text me

"Reason being.......? If you didn't want to do dinner, just say so. I have no desire or time to waste playing games."

She called and left me a voicemail apologizing. Then when I didnt answer she sent 6 texts explaining what happened and saying sorry like 6 times....
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Sorry was driving. Her texts made no sense so i called back and she clarified everything. She lives about an hour away, and she was in town when she sent the text about getting together for dinner. She says her work called and told her she had to go in to cover someone. After that she said she was still dwontown shopping and when she went to call me to get toigether, her phone was dead. She then gets lost trying to find the street she parked on (country girl in a city for the 2 or 3rd time, or so she says) When she found her car, she said that she forgot her charger in her work vehicle. At this time its to late to do dinner, she has to drive back to her part of town an hour away to get ready to cover a shift.


Still skeptical about it. On the phone I was like, "Really....... all that happened?" She said yep. She said," i really want to go to dinner with you, and sometime very soon if you can forgive me for what happened." We chit chatted for a few min then i told her i had to go, and for her to figure out her schedule and maybe we can do something sometime.
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
K, she called and we talked. Said she really wanted to go out together, so I told her the place, and time. If she doesnt show/call number is getting deleted and its on to the next!
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
We scheduled dinner for tonight. I sent her a text to see if we were still on and she sends back, "Can we move it to tomorrow my dear?"

Im sending back, "no can do, maybe some other time"

So thats 1 re-schedule, 1 no show and now another reschedule (attempt, which im saying **** that to)

Writting this chick off and moving on to the next one!
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
My response,

"No, I don't hate anyone. Im just done moving my schedule all over the place to accommodate dinner plans that keep getting canceled or no showed"
Originally Posted by dietsnapple007
Ok, more advice please.

Now, im set on not trying/wasting time on this chick. She has been active on my facebook recently and my buddies keep pushing me to try and get this chick out (she is a damn good looking female, Ill give her that) but i feel in my gut its a bad idea and its a waste of time, and i should just continue pursuing other **** with other females. I was thinking if (BIG IF) I try and set something up again, i was thinking of a short, blunt and to the point text like," Shall we try arranging dinner again?"

Thoughts?

[MerryH]

You try to act all tough and uncaring and non-desperate, but you're still running around to different forums asking whether you should try to ask her out yet again.

"If she doesn't show up or call, I'm deleting her number. Writing this chick off. One to the next one! **** that!...But but but she's still on my facebook and she's hot. Should I ask her out again?" You put your foot down with her and if you renege on that, you're going to look like a weenie to her. It's a lost cause. She rejected you several times. She doesn't want to date you.

[Bottlefed95z]

You try to act all tough and uncaring and non-desperate, but you're still running around to different forums asking whether you should try to ask her out yet again.

"If she doesn't show up or call, I'm deleting her number. Writing this chick off. One to the next one! **** that!...But but but she's still on my facebook and she's hot. Should I ask her out again?" You put your foot down with her and if you renege on that, you're going to look like a weenie to her. It's a lost cause. She rejected you several times. She doesn't want to date you.

Thanks for the feedback!

[MerryH]

You're welcome!

[IndiReloaded]

Hey, someone who actually takes good advice. I'm stunned.

[bulrush]

1. Yes sometimes people have weird work schedules. You have to be understanding. And yes, sometimes they have to suddenly work. Especially in winter months, when people get sick, and during the holiday season, when things are busy.

2. Sometimes the phone dies. They have chargers for the car for $1 at the dollar store. She should get one. They are also on Ebay for about $1.10usd, free ship. No excuse for not getting one.

My point is, if this happens too much, and if it irritates you too much, it won't work because you will be too frustrated to deal with it. That means, time to move on. What I mean is, she either has her life together and knows how to use a charger, or she doesn't. Fair enough, right? I mean, if she can't even keep her phone charged, how can you expect her to keep a relationship going, which is a bit more complicated, and requires more forethought?

(she is a damn good looking female, Ill give her that)

Many good looking women, not all, feel like they don't have to put much effort into the relationship (like showing up for a date), then they wonder why they can't get long-term relationships. Be warned. You have to determine how much "flaky" you can put up with.

[oldskool83]

sounds like she has no idea what she wants and wants a free meal. rescheudle with her to see what she does but pay your own mean,i would to be a dick about it.

[DecentDissident]

In my experience if she has initiated every move then flaked its because she feels like she gave up her "power". What better way to get it back then to try to get you to chase?

My advice. Don't chase. Don't be rude. In fact be as short and charming as possible. When she says shes sorry for standing you up and wants to go out simply reply with"No prob. another time. " then NEVER initiate contact again. She'll chase.

[bulrush]

OP, do you think she likes the chase (regardless of who is chasing whom) or she is addicted to drama? Something to think about.