Should I leave her???

[Snowfall80]

Hello All,
I am madly in love with my girlfriend but last couple of months have made me question if she is worth investing my time and heart in. While the relationship is still fairly new 5 months, I strongly feel I want to be with her for the rest of my life but not sure if this is the 3rd strike for her.... First one occured 2 months in, Iwas away on business and recieved a call from her asking to talk. Now she led me to beleive she was divorced, but things didn't go her way that day in court and it appeard things were going to be drawn out so she fessed up that she was only seperated and the divorceisn't final. Now if she told me to begin with it wouldn't ofbeen an issue because I know that marriage is over. The second occurred after a romantic vacation where I went ll out to make her happy, rose pedals on the bed, nice dinners etc. I stayed over her place the day we got back and while getting ready I grabbed what I thiught was my blackberry to check in at work but it was hers (exact same one) and saw texts between her and sever al guys, as well as one conversation she had waiting at the airport for our flight where the guy asked what she was doing for Thanksgiving she replied going to ---- with no mention of me, the nhe invited her to his restaurant and she accepted, then he asked her for a drink and she did not say no (or yes), then this morning her dog got a hold of her purse and her wallet, while getting it away from the dog the wallet emptied and I found a couple of mens business cards.... I am so upset, everything is pointing to this woman being disloyal and untrustable. I am very attached to her 2 daughters and it's killing me..... am I wrong to think she cannot be trusted??? please help

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Can't be trusted. Dump her.

[Cerby]

3 strikes in 5 months - she isn't worth staying with, there is a trust problem already. Its just lust, and you'll heal quickly.

[Hookahmike]

Shes using you get out now

[Cerby]

Shes using you get out now

I think her using him is jumping the gun, he hasn't stated any reason why she would be using him. Plus, based on all the relationship issues you've posted yourself in the past weeks I don't think you're in a position to give sound advice.

[Hookahmike]

Given my former relationship i feel im the perfect one to advise on bad relationships xp thats over now anyway

[P.A.T.G.O.D.]

Well, she's lied to you about the marital status, which is pretty big. The mix-up of the phones I can beleive - and you found some texts that indicate she's not just sharing her affection with you. I don't beleive the "dog ate my integrity" story to cover you snooping through her wallet, though. I have several men's business cards in my wallet too. They're there because I'm networking for a job. So, that doesn't mean anything.

But the first two, taken together would make me question her integrity. At the very least, I'd tell her you want to slow things down and see how things unfold. The fact that she's still legally married is a good reason to slow things down anyway.

[HeartIsAching]

Good god. You really need advice about this? She's lied to you three times in 5 months. It's not time to walk, it's time to run.

I'd bet you large amounts of someone else's money that she's getting divorced because her ex caught her cheating one time too many.

[bcgirl]

she is going through a divorce. I think she enjoys being single and getting the affection and attention from guys that she has been lacking while she was married all those years. Perhaps she is on a dating site and that is why she is talking to several guys at once. She can not be trusted and after only 5 months you've found out so many things about her.... she wants her cake and eat it too.

[Wakeup]

I am very attached to her 2 daughters and it's killing me..... am I wrong to think she cannot be trusted??? please help

Next time don't even meet your dates young children until you're sure of the person you're dating and you know that she's trustworthy and that the relationship is sturdy and reciprocal. After less than 5 months you have discovered many unattractive traits in your "gf" You certainly couldn't be sure that she loves you as much as you appear to be smitten with her. Now when you breakup (which you certainly should)her children (that you will miss) will have to get over you being in their lives as well which is totally unfair to them.

The very fact that she introduced you to them this early on is a red flag in itself which indicates that she is irresponsible and selfish when it comes to their emotional well being never mind her being untrustworthy and a whore for male attention.

She doesn't value you the way you value her. Break up with her now before her kids get even more attached and disappointed from your departure.. tell her to quit jeapardising her childrens emotional health by bringing different men into their lives before she's ready to settle down with just one man (I doubt that will be any time soon). You're just asking for trouble, heartache and stolen joy if you stay with her.