Poll: Did She Or Did She Not Cheat?

[VINCEVERETT]

I became involved a year and a half ago with this girl upstate. We got together a number of times, she came down here, NYC. We were on the phone everynight during this period. At the same time my mom got sick and passed at Christmas time, I was really out of it since we were really close. I withdrew into depression. We did not speak every night as usual but she told me she understood what I was going through and would see it through with me.

Now the question, I just found out that during this time she was dating behind my back. She went out with this guy on a simple date one night, dinner and a movie. Two nights later he called her at 10 PM from his hotel room, seems he was between apartments at the time. She drove 40 miles to him and spent the night, she said they just talked, what do you say. No complex answers need here unless you want, just post either "she cheated" or "she did not cheat". I want as many responces as possible so take a moment and post one. Thanks for all your help!

[misombra]

40 miles to talk. she cheated.

[RelationShit]

1st of all, sorry to hear about your mom passing, i know its hard to get over.
2nd of all, i really think it was possible that she did... maybe you need to talk to the person she met in the hotel room to get this straightened out, because right now all anyone can do is guess...

[blue]

nah dont go to the person she met who is to say he will or will not tell the truth?
Neway the issue here at hand is with your girl. 40 miles i would say yeah something is going on
oh and another thing if you are questioning this you are probrably right. Go with your instincts they usually are not wrong

[bluestrattos]

she cheated!!!

[stardust]

hmmm 40 miles is a long way. She has some explaining to do!!

[Innova]

I agree, and im an optimistic kinda person. 40 miles!? That's a long way just to "talk". If you have proof of her dating behind your back too, well then I can't see any other way...

[paco2244]

My opinion is she cheated.

Are you still with her?

[igor]

Sounds weird to me. She should have been there to talk to you and make you feel better instead of seeing the other guy, even if they were just "talking". It sounds like you were in an actual relationship since you talked all the time, so she can't use the excuse that you weren't together so it didn't count.
That's just my opinion. I consider a lot of stuff cheating that most people wouldn't think is.

[VINCEVERETT]

Sounds weird to me. She should have been there to talk to you and make you feel better instead of seeing the other guy, even if they were just "talking". It sounds like you were in an actual relationship since you talked all the time, so she can't use the excuse that you weren't together so it didn't count.
That's just my opinion. I consider a lot of stuff cheating that most people wouldn't think is.

I agree with you that just being with him is kinda cheating, but I am a pretty sensitive person, some others would not feel that way, so I need to find out if she really cheated, sexually. I am really stumped on how to go about it. She swears up and down that she did not, but she has a good reason to lie. I could contact the guy but I am not sure if he would tell me the truth either, he could be a gentleman and say no even if he did, or he could say yes just to screw her for not staying with him. Anyone out there have an idea how to find out for sure?

[igor]

Some guys might tell the truth. Did he know about you? That could make a difference. If he didn't know, he'll be mad at her for not telling and might give you all the information you want to know because he's mad at her. If he knew about you, then he's a jackass for dating her at the same time (and probably a liar).

[misombra]

dinner and a movie. driving 40 miles to see him. you don't have to ask anybody, you already know.

[cheese_sausage]

i think u've already been convinced that she's cheated. why dig deeper? if i were you, i would start thinking about dumping her or not. just my 2 cent.

[Ashley]

1) were you guys offically dating in the first place? I didnt really get the impression you were it seemed more like advanced friends with phone clals and a few dates... she might have a different prespective on your relationship.

I say she didnt cheat.
She said she didnt.
My reason fo rsaying she didnt cheat is because you dont know what she was talking to him about there are many disscussions that need to be talked about person to person and are worth a 40 mile drive easy.

[Innova]

Thats a good point. (About the dating thing)

That being said, if she was...the evidence is not in her favor. Dinner and a movie with the guy (ok, could be friendly). Called later at 10pm, from a hotel, and she spent the night..40 miles away? Honestly, it could of been done over the phone. That sounds like cheating, and nobody can say it doesn't with a straight face.

This is asuming that you guys where actually dating as Ashley stated.