Chill out or blow him out?

**Dreamer87** · 31-10-12, 02:32 AM

Hey, would just appreciate some impartial advice on this as i'm not sure how to feel!

I dated a guy for a few months last year. We met through mutual friends and clicked immediately. Things hotted up pretty quickly and it seemed like he always wanted to see me or speak to me, either on the phone or by texting. It appeared to be going really well. However by the time we got past the crucial 3rd month stage he cooled off somewhat and when it came to 'The Chat' he said he wanted to keep things between us as they were (i.e, not progress to an official relationship). Obviously i was hurt by this and ended things. I feel this was the right thing to do but i missed him loads and didn't feel any happier for my decision.

We met up once more about 2 months later and had a lovely evening. I didn't go back to his despite his best efforts..! Stupidly i thought this date could have been the start of rekindling something but a few weeks after that i heard through a mutual friend that he'd started dating some girl from his office. This felt pretty **** so i decided to just let things be and not contact him. In the meantime i casually dated a couple of other guys but in truth nothing took my mind off him. I heard from our mutual friend that 'my' guy and the girl from his office went out for a few months before breaking up (not sure who ended it, but for whatever reason it didn't work out).

A while ago (it would have been about 2 months after he and this girl broke up so presumably not a rebound thing) i got a text from him out of the blue saying he'd walked past this restaraunt we used to go to and it made him think of me. Since then we've been texting on and off. It's always him that initiates the contact, just random little things and generally seeing what i'm up to. He asked if i wanted to meet to catch up, to which i replied "Not sure, see how it goes." I figured if he was genuinely interested he would pursue it, which he later did. The plan is to meet up in a few weeks (as i'm crazy busy with work at the moment).

So, i'm not sure how to approach this. Our mutual friend had told me that he used to ask after me, but i figured that was just him making conversation. I still really like him, but i'm not really sure what his intentions are. If it's just to get laid he knows that's not necessarily an option as it didn't happen last time we met. I know he's still on good terms with his ex and still sees her (as part of a larger group of mates) about once a month. Should i regard him with suspicion, or just chill out and see how it goes?

Confused and would very much appreciate some advice!

**BackUpOrGetStng** · 31-10-12, 02:39 AM

I wouldn't expect anything more from him than what he previously offered. If years had passed then maybe he could have changed enough, but even then he would be up front. You're probably just a passive pursuit of his.