26 and freaking out! Help me get back a guy I didn't give a fair chance!

[hotsugar]

Hey all,

Back when I was in my final year of college (22 years old), I dated a nice guy (lets call him Mr. Nice) for a few months. He was the DEFINITION of a "nice guy"-- cute, fantastic sense of humor, was the only guy I've ever met who was as witty/pop-culture savvy as I am, but, it was obvious that he was totally inexperienced with women. He never made a move on me, or initiated physically, and every time he tried, he'd confuse my coy, momentary 'playing hard to get' act for me being icy, and would refuse to give it another shot during that date (basically, he tried once, struck out, and didn't realize that taking another swing would get him what he wanted).

We "dated' for 6 sexless months, then broke up and went our separate ways. Now, I'm 26, been with a bunch of loser assholes, all of whom, I hated. And at a recent party, Mr. Nice's name popped up during one of those "remember [x]? I wonder what happened to him?" conversations with friends. Apparently, he recently sold a comedy screenplay to a Hollywood studio, and seems to be fulfilling his dream of being a feature comedy filmmaker (I remember being pretty attracted to how passionate he articulated his dream and how much he wanted to make it happen for himself).

Now (finally), here's my question. I can't say that in the years since our breakup that I have never thought about Mr. Nice. In fact, given my string of crappy relationships, and my timeline of wanting to get into something serious (think engaged) by 30, I desperately want to get back in touch with Mr. Nice and get the old sparks sparkin' again!

But how the heck do I actually do this successfully? When we broke things off, I was sort of abrupt with him. Simply not responding to his txts/calls anymore after telling him that we should just be friends.

Help me, more experienced friends! This dude could be my future husband!

[searock]

Why didn't you initiate sex with him? Why didn't you at least tell him that you wanted him to initiate sex? Why did you break up with him, if you didn't actually want to? Why do you want to get back together with him - is it only because of the Hollywood thing?

Just contact him, apologize for ending things the way you did and ask him if he wants to grab a coffee sometime.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You're getting what you deserve, just accept it. Kill yourself if you can't get over it.

[bcgirl]

So now that mr. Nice is all Hollywood hotshot and perhaps going to be making the big bucks you are all interested... But when he was mr. Nerdy and awkward you found him boring and craved a bad boy. Now you realize what you've lost. Well you can always call him up and ask for another chance. If he rejects you, tough luck.

[HeartIsAching]

So... you played games with him, didn't even have the decency to actually break up with him, and now that he's successful and you're single again, you want him back?

Fascinating.

[HeartIsAching]

bcgirl - I'd thank your post if I could... can't even add to your rep. Sorry.

[Guybrush]

he'd confuse my coy, momentary 'playing hard to get' act for me being icy, and would refuse to give it another shot during that date (basically, he tried once, struck out, and didn't realize that taking another swing would get him what he wanted).

For ****s sake, let this be a reminder to everyone. I'm speechless.....

In fact, I am sincerly GLAD to see that playing games with people doesen't pay off

[Guybrush]

bcgirl - I'd thank your post if I could... can't even add to your rep. Sorry.

Taken care of

[HeartIsAching]

Actually, it DID pay off. Exactly how it should have.

What's funny is that she calls him inexperienced and confused.

[HeartIsAching]

Weird... now I can.

[MehicanFather]

It's not that funny.

[HeartIsAching]

Your new handle is funny.

[MehicanFather]

Yeah, true, lol.

[bcgirl]

Funny how karma can be a real biatch.
I had a friend in high school who was nerdy, shy and awkward. Noone wanted to be his friend and he couldn't get a date to save his life back then. Since he never went to all the cool parties, he spent his weekends cooped up in his room inventing geeky software. Now he is a billionaire who invented something huge. All the girls who rejected him back then are wanting him now. He gets to do the rejecting now by being able to get 10/10 Victoria secret models than care about those 7/10's that now regret not going to the prom with him