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Thread: Is my friend really into his girlfriend?

  1. #1
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    Is my friend really into his girlfriend?

    Only reasons I'm asking is because he always makes a big effort to spend time with me too (his closest female friend). Yesterday we went to the shooting range with some of our other friends and I told him to bring his girlfriend since I haven't met her yet. He claimed she had some family thing to go to around the time that we left though. The other reason is when we were driving home he said "she just sent me like 30 texts even though she knows I'm at the shooting range" he kinda laughed but I sensed that he was a bit annoyed. I'm also asking because I find myself gaining feelings for him and I'm pretty sure they've always been there but I would never do anything to jeopardize his relationship.

  2. #2
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    Well, i guess you have to ask what type of future he sees for his girlfriend,
    if you claim you two are just friends at the moment, it'll be easier for him
    to open up about it and you'll get a better picture of where he is at.

    If you do have feelings for him, just be there for him, and when the time comes, depending
    how you plan to wait, express how you really feel about him, and see if he feels the same
    for you, but you do not know at the moment, because he is with the other girl.

  3. #3
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    Just keep it friendly. Hes officialy with his GF and theres no quarantee that you both could have future. Only way to keep feelings away is finding a BF meeting less with your friend. Seriously doesnt sound like hes done something bad to his GF - if hes not making out with you or telling you "I love you" than theres nothing to be worried about. Seems like you just been lonely for while thats all.

    And comment above - telling your fellings - I think you will save yourself an awful moment by not saying anything stupid like that.

  4. #4
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    I agree with pcmaster. You need to create distance between you both. He has a girlfriend and it is wrong. Go find yourself a man and get over him. It doesn't matter if hes into her or not. Its none of your business.

    Plus she may already be jealous of you-sending him 30 texts.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    Plus she may already be jealous of you-sending him 30 texts.
    She could, but she could just be really clingy. I once knew a guy that would send me like 15-20 texts (I counted.) everyday when I was busy, more when I deliberately ignored him (For some reason, I think he just knew....).

    Anyway. I disagree with pcmaster. If you get weird on him, he's going to know something's up. And when the jig is up, there's going to be a few problems between you three, including a crapload of awkwardness with him. The best thing to do is just act natural. Establish mental boundaries with yourself. Be there as his friend, but don't be too close for comfort.

    Meanwhile, start moving on to other guys by talking to others. That way, if he should end it with his girlfriend and want you, you're in the clear because you had nothing to do with his breakup. And you never know; this may just be a phase, thinking this. You'll never know for sure unless you talk to some other guys. Just play it cool, for now. But don't wait on him.

    Also, by being there, he knows you're not going to abandon him, should he have feelings for you. He'll respect you more.
    But for now? Don't get involved. JUST BE HIS FRIEND.

    EDIT: Ps. If things should turn out that they break up and you two start talking as more than friends...be careful. The last man I talked to on a deeper than friends level was the very first gay friend I've ever made. And because of misunderstandings, our friendship is now on the rocks. So, you two would need to be careful not to let it go to a place where either of you could get hurt...
    Last edited by Rowen; 25-02-13 at 08:58 PM.

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