Patchwork Family

[MMOT]

Hi Everyone, I am new to this Forum.

More or less I am just before a breakup in my relationship. Both my Partner and myself love eachother dearly. We both come from failed relationship, marriages and have I 3 Children and she 1 Kid.

For my Partner it is not easy with the children, nor it is for me. I also know that we did not communicate to well on the issue of the children and this is a reason why it seems to fail.

My Partner moved out last year, after living 2 years together. At that stage I felt confident that I made the right choice with her and that I finally can commit. It came as a real surprise for me as it seemed that everything was jelling together. It seems I only have seen my interst at that stage and maybe did not see that she has problems with the situation.

A further problem there is that her child is a typical single child, spoiled and it is very hard for the kid to adapt to having to share etc. This did cause friction. My kids actually miss her now that she is not there. Funny the whole thing in that way.

In a way we are at a dead end now. She is a very stubborn person and does not want to find a solution to our problem. Between the lines she does want to become old and happy with me, but does not want to give in a find the solution. I feel that the kids are not the problem, but it is us handling them and managing them. I really do not know.

We had long chats this weekend, with no outcome actually. She is not willing to be flexible in this regard....and obviously I cannot force her to agree with me.

I don't know anymore how to approach this situation. It is very difficult for both of us with lots of tears! She does love me.....

What can we do to overcome our problems?

[michelle23]

If you both really love each other you would find a way to make it work. It sounds like her hearts not in it anymore.

[MMOT]

The heart is in still...but she has set her mind to it that she cannot cope with the kids! Funnily I had a chat with my kids yesterday and they want her to move in. That answer surprised me totally!

[HeartIsAching]

Right... her heart's in it but she won't try.

Too bad you won't find someone here to validate your opinion to the contrary.

[MMOT]

Right... her heart's in it but she won't try.

Too bad you won't find someone here to validate your opinion to the contrary.

The problem is she does not know what the best solution is. My Ex did intervere in te whole situation and worked the kids against her. She is afraid that this will happen again. The thing is to find the best solution for this. I do not know this either at the moment, as I understand the point she makes.

[michelle23]

3 kids against 1 of her. Id be intimidated too. Its a lot to take on and if your ex is the type to cause trouble-too much drama for me.. but then again I'm only 23 so what do I no about these situations...

Maybe she is afraid to become too close to you and your children incase it all goes wrong and she doesnt just lose one person she loves-she would have to lose 4. That is scary