Little help ladies.

[davidjones]

Hi, I was dumped in January and was a mess until the start of February trying to understand why and trying to get my girlfriend back. After posting on here I took the advice to just cut all contact, leave her to it and get on with my own life.

Literally the first time I went out after doing this I met someone. We did some texting for a few days and arranged to meet for drinks, I hadn't told anyone what was going on and as we sat down for drinks my ex rung, the first peep I'd heard in 2 weeks, it was the weirdest coincidence. I ignored the call and then her text and replied in the morning along the lines of "I'm not ready to talk to you". Anyway, me and the new girl had a nice time despite the call throwing me a bit. We met up again over the weekend while out with our own friends and whilst drunk arranged a second date for tonight.

In some ways I'm quite looking forward to it, she seems a very nice girl and we get on well. However I'm not ready for a new girlfriend as I'm not over my ex girlfriend yet. I don't want to hurt the new girl but at the same time it's nice to have someones attention again. I don't feel like I want my ex back either, but if she was to try and get me back I'd probably take her back.

I guess my question is do I tell the new girl I'm not ready for anything too serious and slow things with her or do I just go along with it atm? I only met her 2 saturdays ago and this all seems to be moving a little fast. She doesn't know about my ex and I'm not sure if I should mention her at all yet? I'm not intentionally using her but a few people have said maybe I am, I don't want to mess her around - I've had enough of that the last few weeks to know how much it sucks.

[surfhb2]

Hi, I was dumped in January and was a mess until the start of February trying to understand why and trying to get my girlfriend back. After posting on here I took the advice to just cut all contact, leave her to it and get on with my own life.

Literally the first time I went out after doing this I met someone. We did some texting for a few days and arranged to meet for drinks, I hadn't told anyone what was going on and as we sat down for drinks my ex rung, the first peep I'd heard in 2 weeks, it was the weirdest coincidence. I ignored the call and then her text and replied in the morning along the lines of "I'm not ready to talk to you". Anyway, me and the new girl had a nice time despite the call throwing me a bit. We met up again over the weekend while out with our own friends and whilst drunk arranged a second date for tonight.

In some ways I'm quite looking forward to it, she seems a very nice girl and we get on well. However I'm not ready for a new girlfriend as I'm not over my ex girlfriend yet. I don't want to hurt the new girl but at the same time it's nice to have someones attention again. I don't feel like I want my ex back either, but if she was to try and get me back I'd probably take her back.

I guess my question is do I tell the new girl I'm not ready for anything too serious and slow things with her or do I just go along with it atm? I only met her 2 saturdays ago and this all seems to be moving a little fast. She doesn't know about my ex and I'm not sure if I should mention her at all yet? I'm not intentionally using her but a few people have said maybe I am, I don't want to mess her around - I've had enough of that the last few weeks to know how much it sucks.

Not Ready? Youve only gone out once with the other girl....just relax.....go out and have fun. forget the other girl since she never coming back.

[michelle23]

You should be honest with the new girl. Let her decide whether she wants to see you again. She will get hurt if you string her along as a rebound-whether you intend to or not.

[smackie9]

After a few dates would be a nice time to discuss past history and expectations, if things seem to be getting serious. That is what dating is all about, the first stage is getting to one another, feel each other out. It would be fair to tell her at that time so as to not lead her on. And like Michelle said she can decide to continue or not.

The majority of people are looking for something serious or at least are hoping for.