Scared to go back to relationship

[abbey3]

After being broke up from my boyfriend for 6 weeks now we met this weekend for him to tell me he still loves me and wants to give it another try.

Now as many of you will know we split because I was extremley insecure and couldn't trust him and never believed he loved me or cared. Now I know a lot of you will be thinking how will this have changed.

I have reflected a lot on the relationship and saw how insecure I was with him. I feel like I have got my confidence back on track and feel like I have become more independent again

My ex has now said he has missed me more and more every day and that he still loves me. I explained to him I still don't know if I feel like I'm in a place myself to get back into the relationship and he said he would wait

I'm just so scared to get back into the relationship incase it's like it was before. I don't think I could stand going through the break up all over again.

Any opinions? Should we take It slow? See how things go?

I think iv realised now if he didn't love me he wouldn't have come back like this.. After all I went on holiday 2 weeks ago that we had booked together. I took a friend in his place and he lost our on his money and holiday. So he can't be playing games either.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Did you ever get the counselling you said you were going to get?

You sound like an immature, histrionic afflicted with ADD.

[abbey3]

Histronic afflicted and add?do u want to explain what that means?

[Ann S]

I say, just date him, see if you enjoy it, and stop analyzing it so much.
What do you mean, "I don't think I could stand going through the break up all over again." You know, when people aren't a match, they aren't a match and we get to be grateful that we aren't stuck in misery the rest of our lives.....or we could be miserable that we still aren't miserable with the person who we were miserable with!!!!! You get to decide how you want to be. Ann

[abbey3]

I just don't want to go through getting back together for it to not work again and have to end things all over again.

I just kind of think nothing will change but I also love him and want to give it another try

[abbey3]

I just don't want to go through getting back together for it to not work again and have to end things all over again.

I just kind of think nothing will change but I also love him and want to give it another try

[bearz]

One of the biggest reasons why you want to get back together with him is because you feel lonely right now. Even though it was just a very short relationship, you had something for those 6 weeks which is now gone. I bet if you found another guy and started dating him most of those feelings you have for your ex would go away pretty quickly.

Actually, looking back at an older thread, you said this:
"Even now if I'm honest I don't actually miss HIM that much, just kinda what we had and the idea of what he could have been. I just feel like I might be a bit crazy??"

Sounds familiar doesn't it?

And what about all the others issues you were talking about? You need to focus on yourself first, get professional help if needed. Don't get back together with the guy, you will only hurt yourself and him.

[abbey3]

Oh no Sorry if I didn't make myself clear..we were together nearly 2 years. We have been broke up now 6 weeks.

I agree tho, i do miss him now so badly but I don't miss the relationship as it got so bad. I'm just hoping that it might change. But i clearly haven't changed yet as I still need reasureance about the relationship.

If In time however I felt better in myself and decided to try again I just wondered if it would be best to start slowly? As if it was a new relationship

[Ann S]

I'd suggest that before you go back, you make a list of what your expectations are for this relationship. I'd also like you to ask him for a list of behaviors he's changes. Ann