How can I make him stop feeling like he's hurting me?

[basilandthyme]

I do accept him for who is, that's why i love him so much and want to be with him.... And what he said when he was drunk i don't know if he really meant it or not, but usually when your drunk you say what you really feel.

I know in the past it seemed that i complained a lot and was always thinking negative and like sulking but i learned my lesson and i just want him to see and show him that i'm not holding a grudge on him, i love him for who he is.

Have you forgotten 'beer goggles'? How alcohol can make an unattractive person look better? Alcohol skews our reality.

And no, you haven't learned your lesson because you were at him the day after the night where you were drunk. "what is your problem...why are you ignoring me....if you're going to treat me like this.....I don't pay bills for random people...." That was some serious whining and bitchin right there. You demonstrated that you haven't changed.

[emmmz]

HeartIsAching :

This forum and especially my thread is about love and not giving up, it's not a "move on" forum.

[emmmz]

Have you forgotten 'beer goggles'? How alcohol can make an unattractive person look better? Alcohol skews our reality.

And no, you haven't learned your lesson because you were at him the day after the night where you were drunk. "what is your problem...why are you ignoring me....if you're going to treat me like this.....I don't pay bills for random people...." That was some serious whining and bitchin right there. You demonstrated that you haven't changed.

I had a valid reason. and even he agreed himself and said sorry for it.

[basilandthyme]

Oh well, carry on as you are then...

[HeartIsAching]

HeartIsAching :

This forum and especially my thread is about love and not giving up, it's not a "move on" forum.

You're awfully presumptuous, aren't you? Telling me what I should talk about on a publice ADVICE forum. Don't forget sweetcheeks, that you came here looking for advice. You don't want to take it? No skin off my nose.

You can try if you'd like; you'll fail. It's too late. You drove him away and now want him back... and he doesn't want you back. Learn from your mistake for next time.

[emmmz]

You're awfully presumptuous, aren't you? Telling me what I should talk about on a publice ADVICE forum. Don't forget sweetcheeks, that you came here looking for advice. You don't want to take it? No skin off my nose.

You can try if you'd like; you'll fail. It's too late. You drove him away and now want him back... and he doesn't want you back. Learn from your mistake for next time.

And after all, he is suppose to be my friend, even if he doesn't act like it right now and he's ignoring my messages, obviously there's a reason behind it and he doesn't ever tell me to leave him alone or to stop talking to him, so if I was bothering him I think he would tell me and not just ignore me. Maybe he's thinking or doesn't know how to reply? I think he likes to be chased after and having that feeling of being loved...I mean who wouldn't want that? Unless I was stalking him but obviously i'm not, the last time I saw him was over a month ago and I have no way to contact him other than Facebook. And it's not like i send him messages everyday, i sent him a few which were really spreaded out and he replyed to one of them, he doesn't treat me like that because he "doesn't like me" or "hates me". He's just a busy person I guess, he's like that with a lot of people.

And if he was sick of me showing him all the affection/feelings, why would he treat me so nicely after that? The last time I saw him he gave me a long hug and said "i'm sorry I know I wasn't okay with you" and it was a long hug. And then the whole day he stayed around me and asked me questions about how i' doing and if i'm still working and etc and then we watched a movie and when I left we gave each other another long hug. And I was putting my shoes on and he asked "So i heard _______ was trying to cruise you?" I said "Ya....He asked me if I was still seeing you" and then he just kinda looked around and made an expression like ***? and he said thats wack! then he said "Do you find him good looking?" I said "Ew no way!" and then he just kind like shrugged his shoulders and snickered. But if it didn't bother him, why would he ask? I understand why he would ask If the guy tryed to cruise me, but he asked if I found him good looking, like he was wondering if I was interested in him, but why would he ask if he didn't care?

And that was the last time i saw him and now all of a sudden he's like ignoring my messages...I'm not sure why, but maybe that has something to do with it?

[VincenzoG91]

What's all this talk about jail? Are you underage? Did he hit you? What is going on?

Aside from that, it seems like you acted like a big drama queen, and most guys can't stand drama queens. Your desperate attempts to get him back probably just seem like more drama to him.

You should probably just get on with your life. As somebody once said, "A woman should never chase after a man or a bus. The next one will arrive soon enough."

[emmmz]

No the jail thing has nothing to do with me.

[basilandthyme]

I ignore people who I don't want to speak to - I can't be bothered with the hassle of telling them to stop messaging me. There was this one guy who wanted to have annoying FB chats with me but I wasn't interested in talking, so I simply don't respond. Thankfully, he got the hint after a month or so and stopped messaging me. Of course, I was pleasant enough to him when we were in social situations, but I certainly didn't want to continue the friendship online.

So, don't make an assumption that his lack of response is because he wants you to keep chasing.

A person who is interested in you or likes you will find time to respond. A person who ignores you either doesn't like you or can't be bothered. It really is this simple.

[basilandthyme]

I had a valid reason. and even he agreed himself and said sorry for it.

You may have had a valid reason, but don't forget that the whole reason he's staying away was because he can't make you happy. Your complaints (as valid as they may be) following the night before were a timely reminder to him that he can't make you happy and had better stay away.

If he was re-considering, you've just reminded him why he needed to leave.

[emmmz]

Ok!!!!!!!!!!!!

[emmmz]

I understand