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Thread: I thought we were friends! He's lying to me and ignoring me, WHY???

  1. #1
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    I thought we were friends! He's lying to me and ignoring me, WHY???

    I have this friend who I was very close to. He wanted to date me but I wasn't ready, I was going through a lot in my life that was very painful and I just wasn't ready to hop into a relationship, well now I am ready to date, and I wanted to date Steve, but Steve is dating a girl. He tells everyone that they are boyfriend and girlfriend but he LIES to me and says that he is not with her. He will flirt, and act like he's all in love with me when he sees me and he'll ask me out, but then when I say "Dude you have a girlfriend" He denies it. He hasn't called me and has been distant with me, and I feel hurt. I miss him! I don't understand why he is not contacting me at all, not even to talk? It's like he removed me from his life completely. I know for a fact that if I text him he will text me back, but it's the point that he doesn't call or text me.

    Whenever Steve sees me though it's like "Hey we are best buds" and says "I love you" to me which we always said, cause I thought we were close friends. He acts all in love with me when he sees me, but yet doesn't call me and denies having a girlfriend. He is also very distant. But what's weird is that Steve calls my brother to ask him if he has any weed, when he knows I have weed all the time, and my brother said "Leah has weed do you want to talk to her?" Steve was kinda rude with me, and he was saying I need to sell some weed to his friend Jason. I thought the phone call was weird cause who is that desperate for weed? lol, so I sell this Jason guy some weed, and so I texted Steve and said "Thanks Steve! He's cool " Steve responded like 4 hours later and said "Sorry I just got this message, Soo Everything went good?" Like why does he care? And I think I already established that!

    It was just weird to me cause I don't understand why he wouldn't just call or text my phone first knowing I have weed pretty much all the time. I think it's cause he wanted my bro to meet up with this guy or something. Then a couple of days later my bro puts up a random album on Facebook and one of the pics in there is a pic of me and Steve from back in the summer, and Steve puts "Me and Leah on our 3 year anniversary" Of course it's a joke, but I am still confused?? Cause I don't know if he doesn't like me or still does, but thinks cause I wasn't ready that he moved on? I am not sure. I am just hurt cause I thought we were friends, and that is another thing if I mention guys around him he gets either really quiet or he'll insult them, so he gets really jealous. I just don't know what to do!

  2. #2
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    Well if you know that he is lying about having a girlfriend then why are you even entertaining him? He may flirt with you and like you but obviously not enough to end his current relationship and commit to you.

    What kind of weed do you sell? You don't hav to answer btw, I'm just being nosey.

  3. #3
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    I don't understand why he is not contacting me at all, not even to talk? It's like he removed me from his life completely.
    If he was your bf wouldn't you want him to back away and stop talking to some chick that has a crush on him and sells weed to him? I know I sure would.

    Grow up miss chickie and find yourself your own guy. This one isn't interested in you any longer. Seems He just remains friendly when need be because he has to get weed from somewhere and you (or your brother) is his source.

    Get out there and concentrate on getting yourself a good career and forget being a freaking dealer. Men are secondary at this point unless you're making 5 figures and I'm mistaken about your motivation (or lack thereof)
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Gawd hes a cheat, a liar and untrustworthy. Stop being a tool and tell him to piss off.

    Hes showing you now what hes capable of. Do you really want a bf like him? Tell his gf what hes been playing at and then give him a good kick in the balls. Give him another one from me

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  5. #5
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    Michelle, this isn't about what HE is... it's about what she isn't. O.O
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    But hes telling her he loves her and denying he is a gf. That makes him a cheat. Sorry if i missed something. I didnt read it all.

    But ill just add you did frienfzone him OP and now your only interested coz hes moved on. Your both wrong and both need to grow up

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  7. #7
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    He's one of those selfish, slimy dudes that thinks he can get away with seeing more than one girl at a time. He was hoping he could get away with it, but since you were in the know, he just backed off before he got busted. It's possible his GF caught a suspicious wind of what he was doing and slammed the hammer down.

    At any rate, you just dodged a bullet. This guy was willing to cheat and to me that speaks volumes about this guy's shady character.

    Don't waste your time with this guy, or you will end up back in that dark period you were in before.

  8. #8
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    He tells everyone that they are boyfriend and girlfriend but he LIES to me and says that he is not with her. He will flirt, and act like he's all in love with me when he sees me and he'll ask me out, but then when I say "Dude you have a girlfriend" He denies it. He hasn't called me and has been distant with me, and I feel hurt
    When a guy with a girlfriend, one you've told that you'll not go out with him because he has a girlfriend and then he doesn't bother with you anymore, then you shouldn't feel HURT. You should feel grateful that he's giving you the space you need to get the fk over him. This is work YOU have to do on yourself Op. This isn't about him, it's about you and what you need to do to become indifferent to a piece of shit that doesn't care much for you. Dont' feel "hurt" feel relieved hes not bothering you.

    Stop selling dope and work on yourself to be the best you that you can be and forget losers. You don't need to be pining away for them.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  9. #9
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    I AM NOT A DEALER! I am sorry I didn't get specific with the whole weed deal, but I just smoke weed, and Steve was calling up to see if my brother had any to sell to his friend Jason and my brother said "Leah has it" I always have weed on me, but I rarely sell it, cause I smoke it, haha! My brother doesn't even smoke weed, that's why I was kinda baffled that he called my brother before me, granted my brother did say to him that he use to smoke weed, but I don't know. I know he is a douchebag, but it hurts cause I really invested my time and emotions with him, and I thought he was always going to be there for me. I helped him through bad times and he helped me through bad times, but then it seems like all of a sudden he quits contact with me and doesn't speak to me, or anything ever since he got a girlfriend. Like I don't understand? Why can't you still have a friend that's a girl and a girlfriend? Of course I would remain platonic with him, but I thought cause we are close friends, that it wouldn't matter if we have different relationships, that we would still talk to each other. It hurts me to know that I am nothing to him, obviously, cause it's just so easy for him to cut ties with me.

    But then some of my friends, were saying that I didn't reciprocate enough when he offered to date me, but what they don't realize is that I wasn't ready cause of the things that were happening in my life I needed full concentration on so a relationship on a intimate level with any guy was out of the question. He stood by me though and still cared as a friend, but then it's like he just disconnects and avoids me. However, he'll mess with my head cause when I saw him like 2 weeks ago he was flirting with me, and saying hey we should go here and there. He also said "I love you" to me. Basically acting like we are best friends, then no further contact after that. It just hurts me a lot.

  10. #10
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    Like I don't understand? Why can't you still have a friend that's a girl and a girlfriend?
    Because 9 times out of 10 the new girlfriend (understandably so) doesn't want her boyfriend hanging out one-on-one with another girl that likes him and he at one time liked her. You'll understand that when you are actually ready to have a boyfriend and if he is spending time with a female friend and leaving you at home waiting for him.

    Stop giving him the time of day so that you won't be bothered by his "game." He's an idiot that thinks he has schwizzle in his fizzle. Pffft. He's a turd and you're best off flushing him. Get to the point that you would rather not have boyzzz like him in your life then be wondering why they aren't acting the way you'd like them to. If they aren't giving you what you want then fk them and the horse the rode in on. Know that you are the prize and that you deserve a good guy who won't screw with your head. First you have to be knowing what you want before you know what it is you don't want.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  11. #11
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    Hope this is sinking in OP. Your getting good advice here. Dont allow the fact your jealous to go against your better judgement. The guy is a turd and cannot be trusted. Let that sink in and stop acting like a love sick teenager

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