first proper girlfriend? but kind of weird to get my head around!

[siontheman]

I am going out with a girl the same age as me, I really like her and she seems to like me. I am not going to lie she is a 'shy girl' but she has gone away for a week with her university to some french place I don't have any trust issues or nothing but for some reason I just feel sort of Meh... maybe I am missing her which is probably it but I just don't know what I'm feeling? I feel sort of uncomfortable in the way that what I say to her just like isn't enough and when we don't talk I get thoughts in my head that make me think 'does she still like me?' It doesn't really make sense to me, any help is appreciated! as I just need to be told if this is normal and what I should do from here? thanks guys for any help

[Rowen]

You're insecure.

My advice is not to put her on a pedestal. Any two people in a relationship should be equal..

[siontheman]

what do you mean on a pedestal? what should i do and react from here?

[siontheman]

I guess I got a week or so to become secure... but how can I do this man

[Lord Darkshire]

We all feel insecure when starting a new relationship because you are still getting to know each other. It's normal, but try to not let it bother you by keeping busy with other things outside the relationship. Never neglect your friends, always find time for them too, and whatever you like to do that doesn't involve her. Keep a good balance of spending time with her and your friends. This will help prevent you from dwelling on those insecurities you are feeling.

[siontheman]

I hope so, its only been around 2 weeks since we started going out. I just feel sometimes when we talk I overdo it as she's shy and before we went out she told me that she doesnt like the constant compliments.. she's gone away for a week she messaged me on Facebook yesterday and said 'Heyya xxx' but as the internet sucks she didn't see my Hi response but I guess were still good because she is contacting me when shes away at 'Cern' (France) right? I just feel pretty attracted to her and she is pretty amazing but just shy and I don't want to say the wrong thing to her sometimes when I talk to her that's all. I play computer games with my mates on skype when I am home so I do play alot but its just when i get those 5 mins alone like if i go downstairs and make a drink sometimes it just hits me yanoee.. but you guys would say everything seems fine?

[Lord Darkshire]

Yup it's fine. 2 weeks is nothing....it can take months to really get to know someone proper. Take it one day at a time.

[siontheman]

Thanks lord, sorry about that long paragraph I just wanted to know... I think were Ok though we talk quite alot and its usually quite bubbly conversation but one thing.. sometimes I go blank when talking to to her on text.. like sometimes I just don't know what to talk about to her?

[Rowen]

First of all, you can't just become secure in a week. If anyone tells you that you can do that, they're ****ing lying. I've been insecure most of my life, and though I've tried getting over it, after years of failing at it I'm in therapy.

Just try to treat her as an equal. Don't say that she's better than you or that she won't like you if you act like yourself.
Just be yourself and act natural; let her into your heart and don't be afraid of what the future may hold.

[siontheman]

Yeah I know this its hard I do like her alot but shes really shy and sometimes I think... **** i keep overdoing things like when I talk I just cant help it by complimenting her but I guess for her to message me last night I guess things are going OK

[siontheman]

thanks again any other tips? just to take it all one day at a time?... I just wanna make her happy

[Lord Darkshire]

Nothing wrong with long pauses. That is a good thing, it makes you more desirable believe it or not.

[siontheman]

Yeah I am happy with it I just need to stop trying to imagine what she is thinking about me.. she said on friday that she will miss me too XD I think I just need to keep the compliments down abit and just think of more creative things to talk to her about ;D

[siontheman]

I guess I am right there?

[Rowen]

You just need to act natural. Talk to her as if she's a friend you're getting to know. Don't smother her.