In a relationship & in love with someone I haven't seen for a year, HELP

[ConfusedDoll]

At first I thought it was a phase but it's been 4 months now and it's slowly driving me crazy. So here it goes, I'm in a relationship with A (Male 22) who I met in April 2013, however before I got together with A I came across S (Male 20) who lives around the corner from me, now me and S became close very quickly and were really good friends. We had a great bond however over time we fell for each other, we were seeing one another yet he didn't want a serious relationship so I cut him off and we ended on really BAD terms, I deleted his number and lost contact with him completely. So me and A met online in April and after talking every day for a month we met up (as friends) yet hit it off straight away, we had a great connection, the conversation would always be flowing and there was never a dull moment between us, we could also relate on personal issues and were very career motivated and passionate about the same things. Begining of June 2013 we began our relationship, it was a bit soon but it felt right and we both wanted to go ahead with it, we were going with the flow. During this period I had no contact with S whatsoever. However in October 2013 I was involved in a car crash, my skull cracked open and I suffered from memory loss for about 5/6 days. I was in a coma for just over 24 hours yet when I awoke from it I did not recognise any of my family that were around my bed and had no recollection of what happened beforehand. Yet according to doctors and my family I was calling out for S and asking for S when I awoke from the coma. A month later in November 2013 after I had finally recovered and was back at work, I saw S at the train station. We didn't talk. Yet ever since awaking from the coma last year I haven't been able to stop thinking about S, I've even gone on a break from my relationship and had time to myself to breath how that hasn't helped whatsoever. I miss him yet I have no way of getting in contact with him whatsoever. I know where he lives yet I'm not aware of the exact door number. I don't want to stalk him outside of his house every day cause that would be completely strange and also a waste of time. I don't know what I wish to seek if I do get in contact with him. All I know is that I need to see or speak to him before it drives me insane. Some of you reading are probably thinking I'm a loner I need a hobby or just weird, however I work full time live a normal daily life but because of this haven't been able to focus on my daily activities. I'm looking to end my current relationship, not for S but because I've been through a lot of pain and let down with A, he's hurt me and done some unforgivable things. Anyway this post is irrelevant but I'm sure someone's been in a similar sitaution. And I really need advice on what to do next. I've tried forgetting S but it's truly impossible. Anyway if anyone has been reading this thanks

[searock]

Break up with your boyfriend. After that you can think about what to do about the other guy.

[pcmaster]

Was A been supportive after hospital? Did your memories came back after accident? Whats the unforgivable things A done? Why are you still with him?
Have you tried to contact S?
Your story is very short.

[ConfusedDoll]

A was a bit supportive but when I wasn't feeling intimate he wasn't understanding. Yes all my memory is back now it came back five days after the accident. A has let me down on so many levels too many times. He's also ruined my confidence and made me feel insecure on many occasions. There's other things I rather not talk about too. I already stated I have no way of contacting S I have no number no email I tried looking for him on social networking sites and couldnt. I know what road he lives on and that's it I stated this in post

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I'm planning to break up with him when I see him

[pcmaster]

I think S is in your subconcious mind. Thats why you screamed his name while asleep. However you ended it up on bad terms so best you can do is try to find him thru FB, not sure its worth more efford. Perhaps deep inside you feel tied to S like guilty about how it all ended, like theres something unfinished left. Back then you made choices that affected your life, eventualy something lead you to accident. And accident itself dont make it easier to forget past.

However theres other letters in alphabet so A and S dont matter that much once you concentrade on new letters. You never realy knew S and A is not worth the time. Most important take care of yourself. Let go past, forgive yourself and others. Everything will be great. No one knows what future holds.