Some helpful advice ladies please

[lh707]

I will give you the basics:


My girlfriend broke up with me 2 months ago and said she wanted nothing to do with me anymore(too much arguing, stubborn, hard headed) she said she couldn't be friends with me because she wants to be with me but can't............for about a week or so we barely talked, texted or anything. We started slowly talking and then even she came by my place twice last month, I went by her work a couple times(when she got off) all the times we would embrace, hug, kisses on the cheek and talk for a bit, we seem to see each other since about once a week.


I asked her out for my bday and she declined, I asked her out for the following week and she declined as well(she said she wasn't ready for that) all the while we talk on the phone every day sometimes 2-3 times a day, we text too. I'm not dating anyone and either is she, I finally after waiting a few weeks asked her out 2 weeks ago and she said yes, we had a great dinner, walked around afterwards she grabbed my arm to lock arms, we hugged like several times and a lot of flirting. We ended up back at my place in bed making out(first kisses in 2 months) I tried to have sex a couple times as we were both pretty much naked but she said no "just hold me and love me" so I did. We had a great overall evening. We are continuing to talk every day and see each other here and there but she told me 2 days ago when it came up that she still feels the same way( from day 1 she said she was damaged and didn't see us getting back together) I'm confused! I don't know what to do at times? I give her space, I'm not bugging her about us etc.............actually she calls me 90% of the time! I answer her calls and reply to her texts and stuff like that. I really could use some advice! this woman is the Love of my life and means every thing to me! I want to have a life with her! Marry her someday............oh yeah and she said the other day when I asked her if you don't see us together can you see us as friends? she said "no way! "I could never just be friends with you"

Just seems like a tough spot there is Relationship on one side and Friendship on the other and here we are for the last 2 months right stuck in that middle! uggghhhhh

[michelle23]

How long were you together? Your being a doormat! You need to tell her its all or nothing and mean it! If she still refuses to get back together then forget her

[lh707]

How long were you together? Your being a doormat! You need to tell her its all or nothing and mean it! If she still refuses to get back together then forget her

Hi Michelle, We were together for about a year. I brought it up a couple days ago as I said in my original post that she said she hasn't changed her mind that she still doesn't think we will get back together but her actions say the complete opposite. We've made strides like I said at first she wanted nothing to do with me and for 2 months we've talked more and more, hung out, went on a date and actually kiss now. But yeah she still has her guard up.

[michelle23]

Shes playing games with you. Shes keeping you around as a backup plan incase she doesnt meet someone else. She doesnt really want you but she doesnt want you to move on either coz she enjoys the ego boost you give her by following her around like a lost sheep.

How long more are you gonna tolerate this crap for? You need to tell her to get lost and mean it. Shes proved shes not worth it

[lh707]

Shes playing games with you. Shes keeping you around as a backup plan incase she doesnt meet someone else. She doesnt really want you but she doesnt want you to move on either coz she enjoys the ego boost you give her by following her around like a lost sheep.

How long more are you gonna tolerate this crap for? You need to tell her to get lost and mean it. Shes proved shes not worth it

Ahhhhh I don't know about all that....she might just not be ready to jump back in all the way with me. I don't think is using me as a back up plan. You're judging her like you know her.

[michelle23]

This is a forum. Weve heard your exact same story a million times. Im just giving you the facts. You shouldnt put your heart on a platter for someone to stick a knife in. If she cant give you a straight answer then stop waiting around. How long are you gonna let her dangle you on a string like a puppet?

[lh707]

This is a forum. Weve heard your exact same story a million times. Im just giving you the facts. You shouldnt put your heart on a platter for someone to stick a knife in. If she cant give you a straight answer then stop waiting around. How long are you gonna let her dangle you on a string like a puppet?

She has given me a straight answer(s) if you read my post correctly. She doesn't see us getting back together and she also doesn't want to be just friends.......so I'm stuck in the middle. I don't care how many times you've heard this story every person is different! I know I don't want to be a puppet and at some point we have to decide to go one way or the other with this I just don't know when? I guess it comes down to me and how long I wanna play this game. I'm stuck right in the middle.

[michelle23]

Exactly. Thats what I am saying. You need to take control and end this coz she wont. Shes keeping you in limbo which Is cruel and unfair

[lh707]

Exactly. Thats what I am saying. You need to take control and end this coz she wont. Shes keeping you in limbo which Is cruel and unfair

I got her a ring (promise ring) and said screw it I'm doing it(yesterday) she accepted it and were back.

[smackie9]

So when she wants to get engaged she just has to breakup with you, act childish, give you the run around until you open your wallet and buy her a ring?? nice girl you got there.

[lh707]

Never gave me the run around she never changed her mind....maybe her actions were different at times but she stuck with her word. I said this is what I want if not we need to move on, she accepted and that's great. We never spoke of marriage or even being engaged once while we were together she was almost crying when I gave her the ring....shocked to say the least. She could've declined!! Your statement is pretty lame and judgmental I don't know why I'm even responding actually.


Good day