Advise on a 'break' for her to date other guys

[appleblim]

Hi,

I have been seeing a girl for 4.5 months and things were going really really well. I have been single for 5 years and have been on many dates but never really clicked or liked most so when I met my gf I knew she was something quite special as we hit it off immediately and began planning second and third dates within hours of meeting.
Because this was my first committed relationship in so long I gave all of myself to her and totally trusted her as she often told me when she was very loyal due to the fact her boyfriend of 4 years cheated on her. So she was coming from a past almost the total opposite of mine where she was with someone for a long time and I wasn't with someone.

We did a lot together in a short space of time and got quite close. I brought her on holidays to my home town ( not in the UK ) and spent an amazing weekend together. I was always very good to her and would put her before myself as that's the kind of person I am when it comes to the people I care about. I met her mother and mine knew of her. We had made lots of plans for the future and so on. In the few months we were together I felt like I was falling for her and that dosnt happen easy with me, I'm pretty cynical and realistic about most things but now I was so happy.

It was on the weekend of my birthday when we went out for dinner I realised she was a little distant and asked if she was ok and whether she was happy with the way we were going to which she replied with a smile and said 'yes of course'. Later that night I wanted to get intimate and initiated but she replied 'no it's your birthday and Im tired I just want to hug' which was a bit odd given she didn't show any signs of tirdness previously.

The next morning while she was in the shower I saw a notification from OKCupid. I quickly unlocked her phone and saw that she was talking to a guy on there. We met on OkCupid originally but after a few weeks we both deleted our accounts together so I knew this was a new account she had made.
When she got out of the shower I nervously confronted her. She immediately said that she made the account out of peer pressure by her work buddies who were all on it and just wanted to join in the fun and the guy talking to her was a guy she knew who worked in a store she sometimes goes to. I told her I needed some alone time and she left. Later she texted telling me how she was so sorry about hurting me and never wanted to do this again and liked me an awful lot. She then admitted that she is at a crossroads as she had only been single for a year before me and before that with someone for 4 years and never got a good chance to date but dosnt want to end it with me either. She also said that she could see us being together for the long haul eventually.
She suggested a break to figure out what she wants but Im not sure what to do. Do I wait in the hope that this girl who I actually like which is rare for me to come to her senses? I do feel like holding onto this as it felt so special and can see why she might be confused as to what she wants. But am i being too nice by letting her walk over me and not settle for second best?

I realise this isn't as bad as other peoples problems but it's hurting and wanted to voice it.

Thanks

[Jon5465]

Hi bud,

In all fairness you have only been together for a few months ( I have had a longer relationship with the parmesan cheese in my fridge ), and if she's already looking to have a break it doesn't sound good to me.

Call me cold but let her have her break & then if she come back you can put it behind you and move on... if she doesn't choose to come back then you can move on safely in the knowledge that it wasn't meant to be.

I hope it works out for you though... Just give her time, you don't really have any other choice.

[appleblim]

Thanks for the input.

Yeah it's only been a little while but felt it would be worth getting some second opinions. Im not a mess or anything, just curious as to what others would do in a similar situation.

[Jon5465]

Regret & resentment are horrible things. You sound like a logical guy & I'm sure either way you'll manage. Personally I'd give her the break just to see how serious she is.