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Thread: My girlfriend is both stressed from work/family but also having second thoughts?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    2

    My girlfriend is both stressed from work/family but also having second thoughts?

    So my girlfriend and I have been best friends for 3 years before dating. I'm friends with all her friends and our families love us and we are just really close, until recently. We've been together 6 months as bf/gf and for the last 3 weeks she's been acting extremely weird.

    It all started when her ex bf started contacting her. He dumped her 2 yrs ago and didn't start contacting her until we started dating. And I recently found out that he's been messing with her head. Not that she would leave me for him but feelings from a first love are always complicated so she asked him to leave her alone. We had arguments because it was hard for me to understand because I believe that those first love feelings are okay but the past shouldn't interfere with the present. Anyway she has just started acting very distant with me since that argument, and the question on what's going on with our relationship started coming up in my head.

    I've been feeling like i'm being played with and definitely taken for granted because I treat her like a queen. Two nights ago I got fed up so I went over and asked her what's going on. She emphasized all of her stress from work and family things and also that she hasn't been able to get a good night's sleep in weeks which is making her depressed, which I understand but I told her that even though I never pressure her to tell me, that I at least want to be there for her and not be pushed away because when she was stressed she used to not do that. I ended up asking her how she feels about our relationship, and she said she has no answer. I told her that all of this sudden uncertainty when I have been nothing but transparent and kind to her is unfair to me, and that it's simple. My friend said I added more pressure to her by having this talk, but it's not fair to me to feel this way because I almost feel like I'm an option right now and that I need to "prove my worthiness" to her based on how distant she's being. So I told her that either she's happy with me and wants to relationship to progress, or not. She didn't answer, so I got fed up and stormed out of her house. She texted me soon after "I'm really upset that you left like that. I care about you so much but we need to talk about things when we're both calm. I'm so sorry things are like this right now."

    I never responded to her text and it has now been a day and a half since that text. The next day she tweeted something about needing cheered up so she's definitely miserable. I am dying to talk to her but I need to back off and assert the fact that I am not messing around and I will not get taken for granted, so I'm waiting to let her come to me, despite her having sent the last text. Am i doing the right thing? What do i do? I am crazy about this girl and I just want to work through this. However, I don't want to make myself seem like that submissive guy that will always come running back to her, she needs to understand that I will be the best boyfriend to her, but that it needs to be a two way street, and that she needs to start reciprocating and communicating with me but I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing by not responding and waiting for her to contact me again.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    2
    I have bad feeling about this,if you really love someone you dont act like that.... dunno man I would break up,sounds like she doesnt like you,ok she likes you but not fully....... Its like I cant be with this dude so atleast I can be with this uglier dude.

    love is black and white if its not 100% just something in the middle grey meh area,its crap.If you love someone you act like that even when sleep deprived stressed or whatever..... its just lie,a shitty excuse dont be naive theres girl who would love you 100% 24/7,life is short dont waste your time

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