Need advice on what to do for a long distance relationship

[lioil]

So i have been introduced to this girl who is the daughter of my friend's best friend. She is in Australia but chinese and i am here in the states. We kept in touch for about couple of months with phone calls and chatting and recently her parents asked her about the progress. Given she just turned 28 and at least in china if you dont get married by 30 you are looked down upon she asked me what i thought about meeting. I told her i like her so far and i was thinking of meeting with her either i fly there or she here maybe in march or april and she seems pretty thrilled about it and mentioned we can figure out next steps after we meet if we both like eachother etc. She specifically mentioned and understandably so that we are only at friends level with calls and chatting and we could become in a romantic relationship if the meeting goes well and i totally agree with her. I am wondering what i should do when we do meet in terms of confirming whether we should advance to next steps or not which would probably involve meeting more often,with parents etc. It will basically be us together for 1-2 weeks..... By the way she is decently educated with degrees from decent university in australia,she has permanent residency there and her english is probably pretty good given her degrees there and working there. Her family is pretty rich so i think those characteristics should dispel any notion of her trying to marry into us citizenship or whatever. She is definitely a catch if she were in US and from her and her parents she just wants to settle down given her age. Any suggestions? Thanks.

For sure I dont want to settle but i feel i enjoy chatting with her and I think she enjoys it as well... The local game is not very good.

[smackie9]

Be a complete gentleman and let her call the shots on this one. Just show her around your city and all the great things it has to offer like a museum, cultural center, university, etc. Introduce her to your parents, and some close friends, take her out to nice dinners, etc. It me she sound very Asian traditional, so maybe reason up on that to give yourself a leg up on what you can do to make this go smoothly.

[lioil]

Be a complete gentleman and let her call the shots on this one. Just show her around your city and all the great things it has to offer like a museum, cultural center, university, etc. Introduce her to your parents, and some close friends, take her out to nice dinners, etc. It me she sound very Asian traditional, so maybe reason up on that to give yourself a leg up on what you can do to make this go smoothly.

Thanks for the tips! I am not sure about introducing to parents part as this would be our first meeting to feel it out and introducing parents at least in chinese culture is more of "we are in a relationship" situation. What about if i go to china/australia where she would be? It would be her who's showing me around... i guess i just pay for everything?

[smackie9]

Yes you pay for everything to show her you are the man. Like I said, do some reading on the culture. As for meeting the parents (if it happens), you must impress them by giving them a gift every time you visit, and show them great respect. Good luck.

[lioil]

should i pull any moves on her while we are together? It will be a 2 week long "date" so it is quite different than normal dating...

[milk&honey]

Take it slowly and I would hold back from putting the moves on her at least for the first week. If she's Asian and has those traditional Asian values I think she would probably be a little conservative.

[djyganyr]

What can I say, you need to uniquely meet. Without it, you will not be able to build some kind of relationship. Invite her to him. Walk, show her the city, the sights, have a picnic. Then introduced her to friends and parents. And from then on will see whether to continue to build a relationship or not. Take the first step. Then everything will be developed.

[roku1]

Sounds like you're going to have a great prolonged date!

Defo be very respectful and polite, I would possibly read up a little bit on Chinese etiquette (if you're not already familiar) but don't be too 'Chinese' with her. You want to show that you're respectful and understand her heritage but that you're 'you' - a westerner who values her traditions but who is unique.

If this lass has been living in Oz for some time then she's going to be wise to the ways of western dudes so if you really like her and want to secure some romance I would play it slow while giving her the obvious signs that you have the hots for her. I wouldn't make a move on this date fortnight unless she makes is painfully obvious that she wants you too.

I love Asian culture and deal a lot with the Japanese through work. I wouldn't want to insult either country by comparing them overall but one thing that they both share is etiquette; manners and respect are crucial and the key to making a good impression.
I think etiquette will be more important if you were to ever meet her parents but again, stick to what you've agreed (temporary 'friend zone') whilst making your romantic intentions clear (don't be sleazy, play it cool) and show her that you have some understanding of her culture.

Good luck, I hope you have a great time together!

[daisy123]

I think long relation ship is ok but we should make sure that person is genuine abt relationship and will surely going to marry otherwise their no use and its completely waste of time.