Who got emasculated in this story?

[Makkaway]

Ok: Someone dumps his gf one morning and she asks him to leave her house (that's my personal story). After having spent the night at one of his friends the guy misses his plane the next morning and has nowhere to go but to that girl's house. He calls her the next morning and tells her he wants her back. She's ok with the idea of me coming back. Cool. (I'll stop calling him "him").

When I arrive at her house (which she shares with 6 other people) she welcomes me with a big smile on her face. I get in. I say hello to everybody and take the girl up to her room, shag her, and make her a big hickie in the neck. I go back downstairs and go to the garden where everybody's chillin in the sun. I take off my tshirt and give myself a tan with the other guys, smoking joints.

Ok: so what happened during that night where I left (that's what I found out later) my "gf" was so upset that I had left, she ****ed one of the guys who was living in the house. She never told me. But when I came back to that house that day, everybody was kinda silent. The girl actually cried when I left and they all automatically thought that I was a dick. But anyway.

The guy who ****ed my girl looked a bit weird when I came in and left some minutes after. When I got in, I just made myself comfortable in the house as if nothing had happened, as if I had never left. And for the next 4 days I would shag my girl on a daily. Then I left again. (for good that time).

Who do you think between me and that guy should feel the more emasculated?

1. ME: for having been cheated on.

2.or HIM: because the girl got right back to me when I came back.

When I left for good they got back together again, then he dumped her less than 2 weeks later. I assume that he saw how much of a bitch she was. But I'm wondering if he was thinking: "damn, as soon as he got back she just went back to him again! and now that he left she wants me to be with her? no way..."

So who's the one who is "supposed" to feel the more ****ed in this story? (appart from the girl)

Thanks

PS: she was a quick less than 3 month relationship.

[woody]

Your being a dink. Who cares who's more emasculated. What does it matter anyway. You screwed her out of spite. Seems you returned for more of an ego boost to your damaged fragile self, walked in, shagged her as you say, beat your chest a little and made damn well sure that YOU were the one to walk away not as one who was used, but as the user.
Well I hope your happy with yourself. Well done. You just went against your grain. Feel better?

[Makkaway]

Your being a dink. Who cares who's more emasculated. What does it matter anyway. You screwed her out of spite. Seems you returned for more of an ego boost to your damaged fragile self, walked in, shagged her as you say, beat your chest a little and made damn well sure that YOU were the one to walk away not as one who was used, but as the user.
Well I hope your happy with yourself. Well done. You just went against your grain. Feel better?

Hahahahahaha!! actually that's not how it happened in my mind when it happened. It's just now that everything is past and that i have moved on, reflecting on every detail, that's my conclusion.

But like I told u before woody, that girl really did my head in before all that crap happened. I had never cheated on her, always respected her... but she fukcing loved the attention of other guys and I just couldn't tolerate it.

[woody]

I get it man. Its just, by the tone I get off your posts, you don't seem like the kind of person who would need to vindicate in this way. I feel your going against your better judgement and doing stuff you wouldn't normally do man.

You don't need to; it ain't you. Rise above this b.s.
Look, I get you got your heart stomped and balance or that sense of just versus bullshit was seriously affected. You got hurt and it's natural to want to stomp back; but at what cost? Your own morale standards? F that. Don't even go there. If you compromise what your normal or standard outlooks and actions suggest, your only going to hurt yourself in the long run right? So, rise above. Be who you are, take that high road.

She was not the right person for you. Simple. Wrong girl.
No need to return to the scene of the crime for the simple sake of swinging your big dick around. Sorry to be brute but you get the just of what i'm saying.
Sure, I bet to shag her all week long and then leave her hanging probably felt good. But I warn you, it isn't in your natural ways and though the immediate vindication may feel better, in the long run I'd worry if this may haunt you down the line because by what you have said in your past threads, you seem like a good man. A good man who got burned, maybe said a few harsh things but a good man none the less.
This would be wise to remember.
Stand your ground. Don't bend.

Just walk away from this ladies situation. No need to drive it on home for superficial justifications. For you , let it go. Move on. Don't lower yourself.

[Makkaway]

I get it man. Its just, by the tone I get off your posts, you don't seem like the kind of person who would need to vindicate in this way. I feel your going against your better judgement and doing stuff you wouldn't normally do man.

You don't need to; it ain't you. Rise above this b.s.
Look, I get you got your heart stomped and balance or that sense of just versus bullshit was seriously affected. You got hurt and it's natural to want to stomp back; but at what cost? Your own morale standards? F that. Don't even go there. If you compromise what your normal or standard outlooks and actions suggest, your only going to hurt yourself in the long run right? So, rise above. Be who you are, take that high road.

She was not the right person for you. Simple. Wrong girl.
No need to return to the scene of the crime for the simple sake of swinging your big dick around. Sorry to be brute but you get the just of what i'm saying.
Sure, I bet to shag her all week long and then leave her hanging probably felt good. But I warn you, it isn't in your natural ways and though the immediate vindication may feel better, in the long run I'd worry if this may haunt you down the line because by what you have said in your past threads, you seem like a good man. A good man who got burned, maybe said a few harsh things but a good man none the less.
This would be wise to remember.
Stand your ground. Don't bend.

Just walk away from this ladies situation. No need to drive it on home for superficial justifications. For you , let it go. Move on. Don't lower yourself.

Woody I haven't done anything "bad" since I left her actually. I'm still a bit in shock, that's all. And I'm trying to understand the whole situation because it feels like that would help me come out of that fake relationship stronger.

During that week of "shagging" I didn't even know that she slept with the guy. I discovered it about 3 months after I left.

It's not about who's got the biggest dick. I just want to feel like everybody's losing in this story, not just me^^

And don't worry about my morals, they're intact, as before meeting her.

[woody]

good to hear.
Here's hoping the next lady is en par with you. Just don't let this girls experience with you jade you too much. Too many good ladies out there.
well wishes

[Makkaway]

good to hear.
Here's hoping the next lady is en par with you. Just don't let this girls experience with you jade you too much. Too many good ladies out there.
well wishes

Thanks woody

[dontaskme]

Hmmm.... Let me think about this for awhile..........
Hmmmm........

What about the fact that you were both emasculated by the same girl who used you guys for sexual reasons... To derive earthly pleasure from both of you?

Point is, at this day and age, men are not the only ones to use women for sexual purposes anymore. Sure you dump her and he dumps her too. Big deal! She's going to move on and find more guys to screw... Maybe at the same time.... Again.

What's the point in all of this? Take the lessons learned from this disastrous relationship and move on. No one really won here. Every one had something to lose.

Now, stop whining, go put on your big boy pants and find yourself a nice girl .

[Wakeup]

She didn't cheat on you.... you broke up with her ffs.
Then you used her for a place to sleep because you missed your plain and you got to enjoy one another sexually for a bit..... They also got to enjoy each other sexually for a while more too. NO one was emasculated but you're all a little fvcked up and it's looking like none of you are going to be responsible people as a habit anytime soon.

[Makkaway]

Hmmm.... Let me think about this for awhile..........
Hmmmm........

What about the fact that you were both emasculated by the same girl who used you guys for sexual reasons... To derive earthly pleasure from both of you?

Point is, at this day and age, men are not the only ones to use women for sexual purposes anymore. Sure you dump her and he dumps her too. Big deal! She's going to move on and find more guys to screw... Maybe at the same time.... Again.

What's the point in all of this? Take the lessons learned from this disastrous relationship and move on. No one really won here. Every one had something to lose.

Now, stop whining, go put on your big boy pants and find yourself a nice girl .

Lol! thinking that some men end up marrying girls like that :/

Yeah I need to move on completely but I need a little bit of time. Let me whine like a bitch for few days more please

- - - Updated - - -

She didn't cheat on you.... you broke up with her ffs.
Then you used her for a place to sleep because you missed your plain and you got to enjoy one another sexually for a bit..... They also got to enjoy each other sexually for a while more too. NO one was emasculated but you're all a little fvcked up and it's looking like none of you are going to be responsible people as a habit anytime soon.

Wakeup I learned later that it wasn't their first time!

[Wakeup]

anytime soon.
Wakeup I learned later that it wasn't their first time!

You didn't say that in your original post. Seems odd you'd leave a very important bit of info out when asking your thread question???
You said:

so what happened during that night where I left (that's what I found out later) my "gf" was so upset that I had left, she ****ed one of the guys who was living in the house.

And that happened after you dumped her. Did you find out it wasn't the first time after you wrote your thread? Seems she wouldn't be "so upset" if she had buddy as a back up. No?

Bottom Line: You were a twat, she IS a twat who has lots of options and none of you are good relationship material at this stage in your lives.

BTW: I highly recommend you get tested since it seems you and he were using the same slot (for some length of time if she was doing him even before you broke up with her.)

[woody]

Buddy got hurt and lashed back. Normal emo's to have I reckon.

I'm sure he's not the only person who'd whine for a little while but let's hope he doesn't allow it to grip his future senses or sabotage any 'solid' connections his future will offer due to getting cheated on in his past..

O.p, a.k.a Mac,
know the signs and next time don't move in so quickly with someone who lives with multiple men especially if she's one that not only craves attentions from them but acts on it as well. Follow your gut but approach rationally.

[dontaskme]

Lol! thinking that some men end up marrying girls like that :/

Yeah I need to move on completely but I need a little bit of time. Let me whine like a bitch for few days more please

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Fine... I'll let you bitch for a few more days.

[Makkaway]

You didn't say that in your original post. Seems odd you'd leave a very important bit of info out when asking your thread question???
You said:And that happened after you dumped her. Did you find out it wasn't the first time after you wrote your thread? Seems she wouldn't be "so upset" if she had buddy as a back up. No?

Bottom Line: You were a twat, she IS a twat who has lots of options and none of you are good relationship material at this stage in your lives.

BTW: I highly recommend you get tested since it seems you and he were using the same slot (for some length of time if she was doing him even before you broke up with her.)

Wakeup you are completely missing the point. Here's the story with more details. You'll understand everything this time.

I'm French and I met that girl in England. I was going on holiday to France, for a few weeks, so basically when I left for France we were still together. I was supposed to come back.

But then, a few days later, one of her friends (the one that later told me that I was being cheated on) posted on facebook pictures of my ex at the house during a house party.

One of the pics showed her with a new guy that I saw once in the past, putting his arm over her shoulders. Another picture showed her with the guy who I mentioned before. The two pics had titles on them. I don't really remember them but they were saying things like: "Let's live the life! let's enjoy while we're young!"... and shit like that. I blocked everybody on the spot and inboxed my ex saying that it was over.

On all of the pictures my ex looked terrible. She looked sad and confused actually (it's important to know how to read people's faces, they tell you what their heart is holding secret). At first I thought that she was missing me, but then a few days later, trying to figure out what was going on, I knew that there was something fishy going on there. I was thinking: "there's a message behind those posts"...

She later on tagged me on instagram (I know it's quite pathetic all those fake social media) saying that I was a coward and a fake. There was a week long messaging on instagram after she first tagged me and I was basically telling her that I was thankful to those guys for the great service that they had accomplished for me. I even threw in a couple insults so that she knows her real place and that I wasn't going to take her back.

I had no proof of her cheating, but I just knew it. I therefore told her that I was done with her, FOR EVER.

I think that from then on she realised that she screwed up everything that we had built during those 3 months. Like I told you, those guys shagged her like there was no tomorrow (I'm sure 100% about the roomy, but 80% sure for the other one). Realising this fact, she completely panicked. And then she probably thought that I was going to be the one to redeem her for what she had done, by taking her back. She even took the plane to meet me in paris but I just ignored her.

All the girls in the house, who I had really friendly and genuine friendships with, took my side and insulted my ex (especially one who I used to have really nice conversations with). The thing is that the roomy had a sex buddy in the house already. They lived in the same room. When that girl found out about my ex she completely snapped. That's why my ex was kicked out of the house.

So basically my ex got the biggest slut-shaming ever.

I hope that you understand more now.

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Buddy got hurt and lashed back. Normal emo's to have I reckon.

I'm sure he's not the only person who'd whine for a little while but let's hope he doesn't allow it to grip his future senses or sabotage any 'solid' connections his future will offer due to getting cheated on in his past..

O.p, a.k.a Mac,
know the signs and next time don't move in so quickly with someone who lives with multiple men especially if she's one that not only craves attentions from them but acts on it as well. Follow your gut but approach rationally.

Thanks woody. I was walking through the valley of darkness. I'm seeing everything clearer now

[breathe123]

If what you did makes it easier to feel less hurt & move on quicker than good, if that is why you did it. What is your real life friends thoughts on this?