Advice about pornography use and toys.

[oakcaster]

I am one of the few guys who hates porn and is against sexual objectification of anyone. My girlfriend and i have been together 2 years and started dating because of my views on women. She used watch porn all too often. Throughout our relationship it has been a problem because she would say that she will stop and many times she has been caught doing it again. I can understand that anyone would want to have their special time and get it out of they way when they need to. But she would look at pictures, videos, and gifs of categories specified to "large penises" "Girls being surprised by large penis" "cumming on girls". All sexually towards the size of a mans penis, and she woudl spend HOURS sometimes more than 5 hours nonstop. I found all this through internet history, and now she conceals it far too much. She says she does not watch it anymore, and now she is so careful, even if she was i dont think i would find out. She has lied so many times before, so i have trouble believing that she isn't. I want to trust her so badly, but he disappoints me too often. Now recently I have found out she purchased some vibrators, movies, and a male sex toy, sort of like a fleshlight. She bought it 2 months ago. She has kept it hidden. I don't like sex toys either and she said she would never buy one, so i could understand why she would hide that from me when she bought it, but she bought a male sex toy 2 months ago.
Update : At first i thought maybe she wanted to try to convince me to get into sex toys, but it has been so long. Is she cheating on me? She has no use for that toy but specifically bought it, and also she has bought more porn which she had promised for the 100th time she wouldn't watch.

Pretty much I don't know what to do anymore. I need some serious advice on what to do, or how to even bring this up to her. I don't even know if i can talk to her because she will lie about how she feels. She would look up videos, picture, and gifs of "large penises" for hours on end, sometimes up to 5 hours. When i first caught her doing it for 4 hours, she said she did not even like huge penis, she said she was disgusted by it. Now she references is by saying, big penis is like guys liking big boobs. Idk what to think, she lies so much idk what to do. Please give me advice.

[ConfusedInPa]

If she lies she lies. That doesn't necessarily mean she is cheating. BUT... Being that she cannot be honest about any of this and since you have already confronted her with your concerns (which she completely discarded): I would move on. Being in a relationship means you have faith and trust in the other person. It doesn't seem you have either with her. Sorry

[Wakeup]

Newsflash: It's only "objectifying" if the one getting cum all over is feeling objectified so you can rest assured that your concern is unwarranted. These woman get paid a hefty fee for their "acting" services. Now, if you're talking about woman who have been forced into it then I agree with you.

I say you don't like it because you're insecure and you fear that your "big penis" doesn't measure up.

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Does she ever turn you down for sex and instead would rather masturbate? Is she missing meals to rub one out? Does she stay in bed or at her computer instead of going to work?

If the answer to any of those questions is No, then what's the harm to YOU?

Oh and before you say I'm displaying a double standard, I'd be saying the same thing to her if it was you that watched while having some private time... and I have several times in this very forum.

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... oh and I forgot to say: She lies because it's easier then listening to your insecurity while you try to control her and force her to do what you are insecure about not to mention that just about all through our lives we are made to feel embarrassed and encouraged to "do that" in the privacy of your room. It's ingrained that we don't share our private time so what would you expect, that she tell you and then the moment is ruined as you try to force her to not do it?

[JohnJoe]

I am one of the few guys who hates porn and is against sexual objectification of anyone. My girlfriend and i have been together 2 years and started dating because of my views on women. She used watch porn all too often. Throughout our relationship it has been a problem because she would say that she will stop and many times she has been caught doing it again. I can understand that anyone would want to have their special time and get it out of they way when they need to. But she would look at pictures, videos, and gifs of categories specified to "large penises" "Girls being surprised by large penis" "cumming on girls". All sexually towards the size of a mans penis, and she woudl spend HOURS sometimes more than 5 hours nonstop. I found all this through internet history, and now she conceals it far too much. She says she does not watch it anymore, and now she is so careful, even if she was i dont think i would find out. She has lied so many times before, so i have trouble believing that she isn't. I want to trust her so badly, but he disappoints me too often. Now recently I have found out she purchased some vibrators, movies, and a male sex toy, sort of like a fleshlight. She bought it 2 months ago. She has kept it hidden. I don't like sex toys either and she said she would never buy one, so i could understand why she would hide that from me when she bought it, but she bought a male sex toy 2 months ago.
Update : At first i thought maybe she wanted to try to convince me to get into sex toys, but it has been so long. Is she cheating on me? She has no use for that toy but specifically bought it, and also she has bought more porn which she had promised for the 100th time she wouldn't watch.

Pretty much I don't know what to do anymore. I need some serious advice on what to do, or how to even bring this up to her. I don't even know if i can talk to her because she will lie about how she feels. She would look up videos, picture, and gifs of "large penises" for hours on end, sometimes up to 5 hours. When i first caught her doing it for 4 hours, she said she did not even like huge penis, she said she was disgusted by it. Now she references is by saying, big penis is like guys liking big boobs. Idk what to think, she lies so much idk what to do. Please give me advice.

Maybe you are right about guessing she wants to convince you to get into the toys, but maybe she doesn't know how to introduce it to you... Actually, I don't understand your concern about sex toys. I remember my girlfriend and i have had a strange perion in our relationship, that was a point when our sex life became so boring. We lost our sex drive or something like that. Then we had a conversation and decided to make our sex life more deverse resorting to toys. Both of us have never tried them before and even thoght it a little bit gross, so we had some doubts about this idea, discreet purchasing etc. But we decided not to drop off and I made a research around the web looking for appropriate online store and found [url=http://www.toydemon.com/]ToyDemon.com: US Shop for Japanese Masturbators, Onaholes, Meiki & Adult Sex Toys[/url] is quite good. We spent a lot of time choosing adult stuff and finally made a purchase. At first it was weird using these stuff. We tried to use them during the sex and foreplay and actually I just want to tell you they worked great for us! We found out the toys are very fun and helpful for us. I would recommend you to reject all prejudices and superstitions. Just try to share her interest and I assure your problem will be solved by itself!

Good luck!