Is it wrong that I sort of feel like I have to chase him now?

[clairere]

I've heard that you're never supposed to chase a guy. Well I have been dating a guy for a month now and he has taken care of all the texting and setting up dates. I got used to it so I barley reached out for him! He did not like being the only one who had to do everything and I guess he thought I was uninterested so I decided to start reaching out for him more and he was happy about it, he even said now you're making me happy when I told him that I'm gonna get better. The problem now is that I feel like he puts everything on me? He wanted me to promise to text him because it's my turn to start doing it, once again he says that he always has to and he was disappointed in me because I never do. I did text him now asking if he wanted to go for our usual walk thinking that I would have a talk with him about this but he turned me down as he was busy moving out. He does seem interested when we text, he starts asking questions and all that. I remember him saying that I could come over today but I haven't heard anything from him yet. If he's not interested then why is he still making a conversation with me, being happy that I do text him and still hints his liking for me? I feel annoying if I have to text him first all the time but now I know how it feels.

[nootkan]

There is nothing wrong with chasing after someone you feel strongly about. However, there is something wrong when you manipulate the situation by always saying the other half never pulls their weight in the relationship unless it is true. Try to convince him to meet up with you face to face to discuss your relationship and come to an agreement that both of you agree to. If not, then move on.

Also remember that texting is a tool to be used only for casual communication and not developing a relationship. After all how can someone be sure that a text is sincere when you cannot look into their eyes and see the emotion or feeling that accompanies the words? Texting is no indicator that a relationship is on solid ground and nor should it be.

Don't compromise your principles or beliefs just because he says he is doing all the work in the relationship, especially if you are contributing equally to it. Good Luck.

[basilandthyme]

I'm not so sure he's manipulating the situation. It could well be that he thought that you were disinterested and is now watching your actions to see whether or not you are into him. In short, you probably have some making up to do.

If you really don't want to make up for your earlier display of disinterest, then have a conversation with him. Talk about how you messed up initially but would like the future to be a 50/50 split of showing of interest.

Nothing is ever solved with lack of communication.