Girl I liked overheard me talking bad- URGENT

[STR1985]

Now here is my situation: (sorry I couldn't able to concise as I thought you need to know it all - HELP...)

Year ago a new girl joined our office & came to work under my supervision. After a month passed by doing work we both started developing feelings for each other. It all started with a blank text message one night I send her late night. Since then we started texting each other & talking on phone for hours.

We dated three or four times during the first three months, during which the only physical contact I made was to hold her hand while driving and sitting in car. I know I was weak n didn't make the move as I was in a state of fair (fair of losing her), as she was the first ever girl I was dating. (shameless for me to say that I am 30 years old). We talked cracked jokes at each other and eat dinner and then dropped her back to her door. (No good bye kiss or hug nothing).

In later days I over texted her, over compliment her, agreed to every point she made, moreover, I made this my habit of giving her lift to office & from office to her home...most of the times I insisted her to let me pick n drop her..

In February this year she came into contact with another guy in our office through a female colleague and with the passage of time became cold and distant from me. Not putting efforts in our conversation (mostly 80%efforts from my side) and seems interested in this new group, specially that guy. But she kept me on the hook as well but just as a friend and contacts me only when she needs any favor from me.

There came a time I got so fed up with this situation, so I said to her that you have an affair with that other dude, which she denied and stop talking to me for a week. Afterwards she contacted me by herself and we talked for an hour and became friends again (my weakness again). But seeing her more interested to that guy I started to feel jealous and depressed. My work, my gym & relationship with other friends started to suffer. Getting worse every day. Colleagues started noticing and giving me advises. I stalked her on social media till today. But time to time (after approx two weeks interval) she use told me that she trust me more than anyone else including this new dude and this group.

I was avoiding her for a week or more. Now as she has been assigned with a new role and she is in work pressure. I knew she will call me. So, Today she called me I was with a friend, by mistake the call got picked and she heard me talking "bad about her and the other guy, that she is getting in contact with me because she needs me, guessing the other reason why she was calling and so on...". She overheard me for about 1.30 minutes...

Later, I texted her that why she was calling so she replied, "I always consider you as my good friend. But leave now. Call was received"

I like her very much & still want her back but I am confused that did she ever had feelings for me as I have or did she used me for her advantage and is she contacting me because this other dude is leaving the job (she is still in contact with her) and it looks she has emotional attachment with her.

Please guys advise me how to recover from this situation and to get out of friend zone and to make her attracted towards me both emotionally and physically. Or whether I should not trust her and move on with my life????

[smackie9]

OK you do lack experience so I'm going to set this straight. You need to stop thinking what YOU want, look at what she wants. She wanted a man, a man to opening show her physically he desired her, appreciated her, etc. You couldn't fulfill that expectation so she moved on. What she saw was a guy that wasn't that into her, or you were too weak and not confident enough to have a relationship with her. So stop putting blame on her this is all on you. You bent backwards for her to regain a relationship with her. You failed again. She is NOT obligated to you in anyway because you were at her beck and call. You, again, only have yourself to blame. You should have told her no.

She has moved on because she had to. You didn't have enough experience to follow through with physical contact, and the normal progression of dating someone, so she gave up. Oh well, you live and hopefully learned from this experience.

There is no turning this around. From that conversation, just proved to her how childish you are.

Here's a tip: never ever date people you work with. When things don't work out, it starts to interfere with your job and makes those around you uncomfortable as they see the hurt and jealousy. You are making yourself sick over this and you have to see her everyday. You are the office gossip, people are actually mocking you for your lack of experience seeing what has happened with this woman. Everyone is involved and is watch her and this new guy and placing bets on what's going to happen next.

The reality of this is, it's over between you and her. My advice to you is to back off, keep your interaction with her professional and stay out of her personal life. And stop communicating with her after hours. Be done with it already.

[pcmaster]

Its alright man. There are other girls out there.
But if you want to give on more shot with this girl then there is few things that can help you.

The Friend Zone Destroyer


youtube.com/watch?v=CC_7NfZ1-Js

Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back In 10 Unbelievably Easy Steps


youtube.com/watch?v=6Ndw8AJXz9w


Also you might completely let go this girl for a while and become good with girls in general. Date around and so and become more experienced. And then if you feel so try again with this girl.
For me it looks that she found you as a nice guy and saw that you are nice and friendly and not sexual predator so she let her guard down but wasnt interested in you more than a good friend.

[smackie9]

I agree with letting this one go and learn to be less selfish with your expectations. No girl owes you anything because she went of a few dates with you. Work on your confidence.

[STR1985]

dear i tried to backoff. i told her once that i what i thought of our relationship to be Romantic one. But as its not happening we should limit our self to professional talk.
a week or two passed by she dragged me into this friend zone again. Yes I realize its my fault to fall for friendship again. I should have told her it is not possible.

[smackie9]

She didn't "drag" you into anything unless she held a gun to your head....bro I hope you learn everything you can from this.

A) don't date people you work with.
B) make a move for a kiss. If they are willing to hold your hand, they are waiting to be kissed.
C) don't make friends with women you want to date or that reject you.

[pcmaster]

Here I found article about friendzone for you.

[url=http://www.simplepickup.com/article/10736/the-friendzone-not-her-fault-yourrs]The Friendzone: It's Not Her Fault, It's Yours.[/url]
simplepickup.com/article/10736/the-friendzone-not-her-fault-yourrs