Baggage Claim Of the Past

[mikumiku]

My Boyfriend didn't like me posting on forums about our problems and I know he won't like me posting about this issue, but I really want to help him and don't know where else to turn too. Anyway before my Boyfriend and I became a couple, we dated, and he talked about his past with me, he dated his Ex-Girlfriend for 6 years, breaking it off with her around 2012-2014. After their break up he entered the dating scene, and wanted to move on and find someone new.

Him and I met online, dated, and became the couple we are today. But here's the issue at hand, he has a lot of baggage and issues about his past relationship. His Ex-Girlfriend, cheated on him for one, among other things. But the cheating has really affected him, since him and I have been together for 1 year going on 2 years, every time we talk on the phone, over texting, audio call, video call, or even Skype audio or video chats, he accuses me of cheating, saying that there's someone here with me that I am talking too.

But the reason he does this is due to his anxiety, he suffers from social phobia, social anxiety, general anxiety disorder, depression, so his anxiety gets to him and he thinks of his past and thinks that I am doing what his Ex-Girlfriend did to him. Even though I am not cheating on him, I never have and never plan too. He says it's going to take time and patience for him to get over his past, but yet he's been out of that previous relationship for how long now?

He says he wants me to help him get through this, and help him get through his baggage and issues, but I've tried, by telling him, he has to do it himself, these aren't my problems, they are his and he has to face them. I really don't know what to do to help him, but I hate being accused of something I am not doing.

[smarta$$]

Maybe these behaviors are what caused problems with his last relationship...

I suggest you not buy into fixer-uppers. Consider him as "as-is" purchase, and take him or leave him. You aren't a therapist.

[mikumiku]

How would you feel if your partner constantly accused you of cheating when you know you aren't doing so? Wouldn't you get upset and mad at that? I have accepted him as is, but to always be accused of cheating when I know I am NOT cheating hurts me.

[dontaskme]

You know, you are like the previous poster here whose username was treehugger. She had a lot of issues with her bf (she made like a thousand thread) yet she wouldn't dump him.... But wait... you are treehugger!

Break up with him already... You are both dysfunctional!

[Wakeup]

Saaaaay Whaaaaat?