Friend doesn't seem to like me

[jashley]

I am so upset, this girl from my church who I thought was my friend had a ladies night get together and posted pictures on FB, and when I asked what it was for and if it was dress shopping she said "No. We were hanging out. And you dont need to be at every social thing I do, ok? Im sorry, but no." What the heck? She hasnt ever invited me to a single social thing shes done, ever. And then I said well sorry for asking I just felt excluded. She said theres no reason you should have felt excluded. But isnt that what you just did? And then to follow it up with an exclusive remark of I dont need to be at every social event you do. Wth? On top of that sh d made a fb post about a sushi get together and when I responded told me itwas cancelled and woulc reschedule it fof next week, then ended up cancelling again because she forgot sh ed had an appointment to get her phone fixed. Then she glared at me at church and didnt end up going to a small group prayer meeting that she was goingto go to after seeing that I was there. I dont know what to do

[melancholia]

This person is not your friend, and even if she was, she is not a good friend. I understand why you would feel excluded, she is being totally rude to you about this whole thing. It doesn't sound like it's worth it for you to waste your energy and effort on someone who can't appreciate it, or put the same level of effort into a friendship that you do. You sound like a nice person, I am sure you can find other people to become friends with who won't hurt you like that.

[TheEvilJester]

Honestly.... even if you two were friends, you DON'T necessarily need to do every single social event together. So, in reality, you shouldn't necessarily let that make you feel specifically excluded. I understand why you felt that way, but you shouldn't feel like she blatantly excluded you. Hell, think of it this way.... IF she did blatantly exclude you.... does that really sound like a friend you'd want anyway. Believe me, though, I can understand how you feel. It's hard, sometimes, not to feel insecure and worry whether or not people actually like you.

Besides, the important point here isn't necessarily that this made you feel excluded.... the important point is the extremely disrespectful way she treated you when you asked about it. So, you simply ask about an event you see on her Facebook, and she immediately jumps down your throat about it? If she was any kind of good person, she wouldn't have thought anything of you asking about it and would have just told you about it. If you then asked why you weren't invited, she'd have just had an equally friendly explanation. Something like "Well, this was just me and a few friends. I didn't invite a lot of people. But, we can definitely get together another time if you'd like."

Instead, before you even had the chance to ask or even imply, she jumps right on you like you were insinuating you should have been invited. She sounds way too quick to anger if you ask me. You don't need somebody like that in your life. Hell, I'm an angry son of a b word (not really had the most wonderful life, and have little to no trust for people anymore these days) and even still, my default reaction is to be nice and friendly to people unless they give me a reason not to do so.

So, I have absolutely ZERO tolerance for people like her who will instantly jump down somebody's throat with little to no provocation. You don't need a "friend" like this in your life anyway. So, consider yourself better off that you learned she is a no good B word before you became closer as friends anyway. You deserve better.