Does he actually like me or is he trying to get in my pants?

[maibao96]

I met this great guy at a club last month and we just really hit it off. He's 23 and I'm 20 but I'm very inexperienced when it comes to guys. When we met, I was out with my guy friends and was standing alone because the club scene is not for me. Really hate those places but I was the DD for the night. He introduced himself to me and we started talking and exchanged numbers. We've only been talking for a month and communication has been sparse cause we're both so busy but its understandable. He has taken me out twice and paid both times. First time, we went out to eat and just had a casual conversation.

Second time, we met up to watch a movie in the city and grabbed something to eat. I had arrived earlier than he did and he called to let me know that he was going to be a bit late cause work ran over time. I told him it was fine and for him to finish what he needs to first. He arrived relatively 20 minutes later. I noticed 3/4 through the movie that he was glancing at me a lot. After the movie, he asked if we could go to his house so he can check up on his family so I said sure. While in the car, he asked how many boyfriends I had before and asked what kind of kisser I was. I told him I wasn't really romantic and preferred pecks rather than extreme smooches. When we got to his house, he asked me for a kiss which I turned down cause I thought he was joking around. We ended up watching another movie at his house and he drove me home. Before I left the car, I gave him a kiss on the cheek before saying goodbye. I texted him shortly after to tell him to get home safe and that I had a great night.

Recently, he asked me to hang out at his house after a hard day at work. I agreed and went to see him. We chatted a bit and were trying to find a movie to chill to. He asked me to help massage his neck and back but I sucked at it so he demonstrated how to massage on my back. Eventually, we couldn't find a chill movie so we ended up laying in bed together with his dog. He asked if he could cuddle with me and I told him I didn't mind so he cuddled with me. Things got kind of sexual after a bit and he started fondling me but I didn't mind because I am attracted this guy. He stopped fondling me after awhile and we kissed here and there and talked while cuddling. Even though he had to get up early for work, he didn't want to fall asleep on me even when I said it was okay. We ended up cuddling the whole night until he woke me up to go to work. But for some reason, communication dried out. I would text once in awhile but he wouldn't reply so I thought he'll text me when he has time or when he wants to. I'm not gonna wait around on a text. A part of me want to believe he's a gentleman and genuinely is attracted me but another part of me thinks he's just doing these things to get in my pants.

[schmidtbag]

A part of me want to believe he's a gentleman and genuinely is attracted me but another part of me thinks he's just doing these things to get in my pants.

I don't think it's either. If he were a gentleman he'd have been a little more courteous about whether his actions were comfortable to you, while also responding to your texts (whether he declined or accepted to see you again). If he just wanted to get into your pants, he'd have been a little more forward and persistent. The fact he eventually stopped groping you means, at the very least, he was waiting to see your level of interest and respected that.

But suppose he did want to get into your pants - whether or not he would text back would be based on a small piece of information you didn't provide: how he presented himself when you saw him last. If he seemed frustrated or disappointed (and not just because he had to go to work) then he likely did want to get into your pants but feels he's put too much time, money, and effort to continue what he started. In which case, you dodged a bullet.

Seems to me that regardless, he wouldn't have been a good choice to you. Don't forget - you met him in an environment that isn't your scene. Considering his initial confidence, that is his scene. There's a reason you don't like clubs. His charm at first might not suit you forever.