How can I win back my ex-girlfriend's heart?

[patelpatel1994]

I had been with this girl for almost a year. This Friday, August 26th would've been our first anniversary if we hadn't broke up. The reason behind that break up was me. I couldn't go to Theme park with her and she gave me warning if I don't make it there she'll break up with me and not talk to me. And also said, "if you don't listen to me right now I see clear stuff that you won't listen to me after marriage," I've been trying to talk to her since last Wednesday and now it's been a week since she doesn't want to talk. Every time I tried to talk to her she just said, "I don't love you anymore." I've apologized so much and told her I was the one who made a mistake, but she doesn't want to listen.

So I was thinking to to go see her this Friday, August 26th at her work, show up with flowers, nail polish that she loves, and her cute picture in frame. Sing her love songs, get down on my knees, and give her twelve roses with 12 pick up lines.
Please help me!!!!

[TheEvilJester]

Well, my first piece of advice would be not to post the same exact message in two separate threads. LOL! I'm just teasing.

Here's the thing, patel...

I have a feeling that you two most likely did not break up just because you were unable to go to this theme park with her. I have to imagine there was a lot more going on, and that this theme park thing was just the final straw in her mid. For the sake of argument, though, let me digress for one quick second to pretend that the theme park think IS really the only reason you two broke up....

IF that is the case, then I would honestly say that is RIDICULOUS and you would be so much better off without somebody who is so fickle and easily upset. Even if you did get back together, what other insanely minor offenses would set her off? You'd have to walk on egg shells your entire relationship for fear that she'd suddenly hate you because you don't like a song she loves, or you are the devil because you like a food she hates.

BUT....

Again, I am going to assume that there was probably more to the break-up then just you could not make it to some event with her. Like I said, I think that was probably a final straw. So, if you are honest and examine your relationship.... what might be some things that led into her having had enough? You don't have to actually answer that here if you don't want... but you should answer that to yourself.

When it comes down to it, NO, I do not personally think you should show up with some grand romantic gesture, singing love songs to her, showering her with gifts, all that stuff. Why? Because if she broke up with you for specific reasons, then she doesn't need to see you are romantic.... she needs to see you understand what went wrong and what you can do/whether you can do anything to change it. So, honestly, asking her to talk about it would probably be a much better idea.

I mean, just as an example, if the problems she had that led to the break-up included that she felt you had no direction/idea of your future, then a grand romantic gesture like this wouldn't do anything to prove to her she was wrong or you were willing to change. If her problem is that she felt you are never there for her when she needs you, then a grand romantic gesture doesn't show her that you see that and will work to be there for her. Now, those are completely just examples I'm pulling out of the air. I don't know if that has anything to do with why she broke up with you at all, I'm just trying to illustrate for you why some grand romantic gesture may seem nice, but just having an honest talk with her would really be much better.

Although, I will say this.... If her problem was that she felt you were not romantic enough/it felt like she was into the relationship but you were not... THEN a romantic gesture like this might actually be a REALLY good idea.

Anyway, bottom line, I think you need to talk to her. Find out what led to the break-up in the first place and decide if it seems like things you could fix. If they aren't even things that could ever be fixed between you two, then why even bother going through all that trouble to try to win her back?

Good luck to you either way.