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Thread: help guys and let me know !!!!

  1. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    It makes you rethink--and it did.
    Sorry Indi.., but that's not at all what happened..

    In case you didn're realize by now.., I prefer to be indirect.., not direct.., it tends to work much better.., especially when getting people to realize such things on their own.., and for themselves.., isn't that the goal afterall? To help someone with their particular issue.., rather than fill up a thread with flowery supportive text and words of comfort that just look nice?

    I don't want this to come out the wrong way.., as i'm typing this.., i'm saying it with a smile on and a very friendly voice.., I know you meant well.., and I hate to burst your bubble.., but by "thinking" you were getting anyone here to "rethink" something through some "shock factor".., you actually had the effect of killing the OP's chance to realize all those things with time.., at a comfortable pace.., and more indirectly.., on her own..

    Each and every one of those questions.., whould have been asked.., with time.., in such a way to guide the OP through different states.., until she herself.., came to realize.., on her own.., what it is that she needed to realize about what is important to her..., step by step.., before you posted and felt like you caused some kind of "shock factor"..

    What is said.., is not nearly as important as what is understood..., everything is planned for.., calculated ahead of time.., to fall perfectly into place.., and get a desired result.., no need to re-think.., and certainly no need for "shock factors".., at least you had good intentions Indi.., but now that you know.., hopefully you won't get the same impulses & urges next time.., there's a method behind my madness..

    Best,

    GrkScorp
    Last edited by GrkScorp; 03-05-08 at 06:41 PM.
    If you can't stop the Wind, then you can't stop the Storm.

  2. #17
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    Grk, you type like you have emphysema.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  3. #18
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    working graveyards is no good for love life.
    baby ya hustle. but me i hustle harder.


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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post
    Grk, you type like you have emphysema.
    I think he types the same way he talks. He takes short pauses and talks somewhat slow. It makes you want to fall asleep because it's so boring sometimes. I'm sorry Grk but I have no idea how you manage to keep people listening or have them stay awake. There's only so much anyone cares to know about human behavior, feelings, business, life, goals, thoughts, and the discovery channel. Start playing some more games and watching some other channels on TV. Life is too short to keep learning stuff, start enjoying stuff, and start using proper punctuation! vashti is right, my brain and eyes hurt from reading through any one of your posts. I feel so dizzy by the time i'm done. Am I the only one? Does anyone else feel that way?

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    what is this babble on my post?!?!?!? I wanted help with my issue lol not a long drawn out battle of who is write or wrong everyone has an opinion and they are entitled!

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    Welcome back.., how're you feeling? A little bit better from last time?
    If you can't stop the Wind, then you can't stop the Storm.

  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Asparagoose View Post
    I feel so dizzy by the time i'm done. Am I the only one? Does anyone else feel that way?
    You may be one of 2 or 3 people (including whomever posts the thread) who actually read his posts in their entirety. Lots of us just skim.

    Hisdemise - this is the nature of posting on this forum. When you aren't responding to what has been posted, just as what happens in face-to-face conversation, the topic evolves.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Asparagoose View Post
    I feel so dizzy by the time i'm done. Am I the only one? Does anyone else feel that way?
    Hi Hisdemise18. I don't mean to disrupt your thread but I was laughing out loud when I read this post. When I read your posts Grk, I have to take a deep breath because I feel like I am going to lose all my oxygen before I finish reading (I must be holding my breath lol).

    Anyways, it may be commitment phobia because of his past. He may be distance because he is afraid that bad things may happen just as his emotion for you become stronger. Men need to feel a reason (a special lover) to let their guard down and open more to only one woman.

    As, for the porn, I don't know. It could be a phase or a coping mechanism. Once he is ecstatic to being with you this behavior may decrease or stop. But, can you deal with his behavior? Remember it may not change.

    The most important question to ask yourself in any type of love relationship is: Are you willing to accept a current behavior of your partner because it may or may not change? You will be asking yourself this question for the rest of your coupledom. Compromising on some things is extremely important in substaining relationships but I digress.

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by GrkScorp View Post
    Sorry Indi.., but that's not at all what happened..at least you had good intentions Indi.., but now that you know.., hopefully you won't get the same impulses & urges next time.., there's a method behind my madness..
    Stop being a pompus ass, GS. You don't understand nearly as much about my intentions as you'd like to believe. And you don't know nearly as much as you like to pretend. You only make yourself look bad w/these types of comments. I notice your posts are more pointed now & you have been thanking ppl more. You're welcome, btw it was my pleasure to point it out to you.

    To the OP: sorry for the digression.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  10. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by GrkScorp View Post
    I don't want this to come out the wrong way.., as i'm typing this.., i'm saying it with a smile on and a very friendly voice.., I know you meant well.., and I hate to burst your bubble.., but by "thinking" you were getting anyone here to "rethink" something through some "shock factor".., you actually had the effect of killing the OP's chance to realize all those things with time.., at a comfortable pace.., and more indirectly.., on her own..
    Sometimes, GS, direct is needed. All flavours of communication make the world go around. You're not old enough to realize that some ppl need to be hit over the head with a hammer to understand a situation. And sometimes subtlety is required. Shock can be a very useful psych technique... but you already know this, with your psychology background & your 24 years of worldly experience.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hisdemise18 View Post
    what is this babble on my post?!?!?!? I wanted help with my issue lol not a long drawn out battle of who is write or wrong everyone has an opinion and they are entitled!
    So, did you break up w/him yet?
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    So, did you break up w/him yet?
    No I just wish that i could figure out the internet porn thing. He had me home for 3 days and 3 nights i took time off to work on things with him. We had sex but he didnt get off said there wasn't enough time before he went to work. so he pretty much had sex with me to please me which makes him a great man but i want him to be pleased too!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hisdemise18 View Post
    No I just wish that i could figure out the internet porn thing. He had me home for 3 days and 3 nights i took time off to work on things with him. We had sex but he didnt get off said there wasn't enough time before he went to work. so he pretty much had sex with me to please me which makes him a great man but i want him to be pleased too!
    All that pornography is desensitizing his manhood.

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    Quote Originally Posted by GrkScorp View Post
    That all depends on what you're willing to hear (read)..,

    Did you come here looking for what you "want" to hear?

    Or are you more interested in why he may be doing this?
    Right there with you on that. Obviously, this is a substandard boyfriend. What do you want to do about it, OP?

    Oh, and please listen to what Squirrley said about being a dog marking it's territory. Don't do that again. It makes you look extremely insecure and therefore weak.
    Spammer Spanker

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gigabitch View Post
    Obviously, this is a substandard boyfriend. What do you want to do about it, OP?

    Oh, and please listen to what Squirrley said about being a dog marking it's territory. Don't do that again. It makes you look extremely insecure and therefore weak.
    Well.., I don't think there's anything insecure and weak about wanting to be exclusive or sex.., like you said.., she does have a substandard boyfriend.., and she does have every right to let him know what her needs and wants are as a woman.., and she's not about to settle leaving them unsatisfied.., doesn't make her a dog marking it's territory.., just a woman voicing that her needs and wants be met.., there's nothing wrong with that..

    However.., yeah.., don't nag about it.., (not only does it not work.., but it will make you lose respect in his eyes).., you have to find a nice way to make him realize.., what you want him to realize..

    Best,

    GrkScorp
    Last edited by GrkScorp; 08-05-08 at 02:53 AM.
    If you can't stop the Wind, then you can't stop the Storm.

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