Hey guys. I need your help. My boyfriend and I have been going out for almost a year now, and I'm not happy. He and I are from opposite sides of the country and grew up completely different. I was more of the "had a curfew until I was 21" kind of girl and very sheltered, whereas he was the non-curfew, hangout with friends, party, popular kind of guy. He's seen a lot more in this world than I ever have... that's for sure. I'm extremely patient, easy-going and very positive. It's very hard for me to feel frustrated and I don't let little things bother me. He's extremely inpatient, let's every little thing bother him, and he has to have an opinion about EVERYTHING. He's a little controlling as well, and he doesn't see it. 5 days ago we almost broke up because he was pissed that I turn on the bathroom vent while I shower (which takes 7 minutes) and says it uses up electricity so I'm wasting it. Whereas he plays call of duty almost 7 hours a day (sometimes even more) and has the nerve to tell me "That's different. That's entertainment for me, so I'm not wasting electricity." What the hell?
I can't speak to the boy about my feelings because whenever I do, he gets mad. I've tried every approach from talking calmly and rationally (which is what I did the first 3 months of our relationship because that's all I'm used to), to sternly, and to blowing up at him. He has no problems blowing up at me every time we get into an argument. He has one of the shortest fuses I've ever seen in a man. Everything has to be his way. He's very selfish, too. Even in bed. A month ago, my grandpa died and I told him while he was playing a game of MW2. He said sorry, that's awful, but didn't stop playing his game. So I just went back in my room to cry and call my best friend. Man, there are good things in our relationship but I always go to bed feeling like shit because I try so hard with this guy, but he truly reminds me of an asshole. Nothings good enough for him, so I'm constantly walking on eggshells.
So... guys. How would you talk to someone who is very smart and knows how to defend himself and has an extremely short fuse? Please realize, I'm one of the types that freezes up when I don't feel comfortable in a situation or fight, so it's hard for me to say the right things and let out my thoughts because I'm filled with anger or overwhelmed. I need all the help I can get because if this gets nowhere after I talk to him, I'm done. And that's hard for me to say, but I will not stand for it.