relationships and time managment question

[justcheckin]

I want to see my girlfriend every day.

She is the kind of girl that can go 2, 3 days without seeing me. (and not get bothered)

Does this necessary mean she feels different about me? Are some people really ok with this amount of separation? Even if dating? I mean I guess I can understand but because I feel the need to see her every day, its hard for me to wrap my head around it. I know everybody is different.

We have basically just texted each other for 3 days now (some phone conversation here and there, but nothing too long). Today I told her I wanted to see her, and she was just not in the mood (she sounded sick on the phone and she says she sick, I do not think she is lying)

Now, after talking to her on the phone today, I told her how I feel about the amount of time we spend together, and she told me how she felt. (see above) I suggested that to "meet in the middle" we should talk more on the phone if she wants to just hang out with her room-mates, that way its something more personal then just a stupid text message, and nothing that makes her have to go out of her way, or forces her to see me when she doesn't want to.

Do you think that is fair? I wasn't being one sided in that request was I?

[girl68]

Does this necessary mean she feels different about me? Are some people really ok with this amount of separation? Even if dating? I mean I guess I can understand but because I feel the need to see her every day, its hard for me to wrap my head around it. I know everybody is different.

Your request was fine but read again what you wrote. You can understand you guess. But then you say everyone is different but then you ask does she feel differently. You make NO SENSE.

She's not needy, that doesn't mean she likes you less it means she has a life that doesn't include you and there isn't anything wrong with that unlesss YOU can't deal with it.

[londonlad1]

It seems as though your concern is based on an insecurity of yours. Why is it you feel the need to see her everyday? In a secure state you may view what's perfectly normal (her not needing you see you for a few days) as rejection. You can't control a person, and talking to her about the issue may make her begin to resent you as she's having to make effort where she otherwise wouldn't. Dependancy is an unattractive quality, and by showing you're dependant on seeing her more often than she'd like is only likely to make the situation worse, which will make your concern worse - and the cycle continues.

By saying 'it's more than a stupid text message', you're devaluing the meaning associated to text messaging. You're making her conscious of her actions which won't enable her to act naturally.

Do you think it's a case of she's not interested in you as you are in her?

[xxazurexx]

Only a matter of time before she blows you out.

Nobody wants a needy, clingy, other half.

[justcheckin]

Well honestly, I am usually ok with it. But the problem is that we were suppose to start school Monday, although due to weather conditions (snow) we have been out of class all week. The problem is that we live fairly close, but far enough to need a car to drive. The roads have been kinda bad so we have been doing our own thing. Unfortunately for me, I have been stuck IN my apartment for 3 days by myself listening to my room-mate screw his girlfriend. She is lucky enough to live with three other girls, so you know she is busy doing anything other then having to sit around just waiting for the snow to melt.

So a combination of bad timing and a few weeks of vary little face time I kinda got a little worked up about it. I mean we talked and what not, I guess Im just pretty harsh on myself when I think I have done something wrong (like in the case of there is something wrong with me because I want to see her every day)

[xxazurexx]

Oh, are you the guy who reckoned his girl lived 5 mins away yesterday??

Then I will recommend what I told you yesterday....you have 2 legs, so does she....use them!

If she can't be arsed and to make a 5 minute trip by foot, nor you, why bother?

Sounds to me like you have way too much time on your hands, hence is likely why you are feeling a need to see her every day.

It helps if you have hobbies and interests to occupy your time and other friends besides the one who is screwing his gf.

[girl68]

You are not stuck IN your apartment, you choose to not leave it.

[justcheckin]

I do have too much time on my hands, Thats why I am upset school keeps getting cancelled haha. I just need something to occupy my time, and because I indeed can WALK outside my apartment, I am unable to go out and due anything

[xxazurexx]

^Why can't you do anything? Surely there must be things to do in your area?

[justcheckin]

well the past 3 days my complex has been under a sheet of ice and I do not have a car that can drive in icy weather.

I just want school to start back up tomorrow so I can start thinking about something else other then my GF.

[girl68]

You're sound quite insecure and really needy to be honest...

[dguywithabeard]

You and the girl are at a very different page relationship-wise. You idolize relationships (you think of them a little like the ones we see in romantic comedies...), while your girl right now just needs to feel she has the ability to attract attention.
This will not work. You should find yourself a more romantic woman who can appreciate the closeness you can share right now.
Certainly one day this girl will also want to share her emotions more meaningfully, but she is nowhere near it now.
Good luck.