I slapped my boyfriend.

[in.these.arms]

Yeah, this relationship is doomed unless some serious changes happen which I doubt will.
It's better to just walk away from this all.

If you do continue, don't tolerate the walking away with an argument. Do not slap him again, let him know if he again walks that it's over between you guys. A relationship doesn't EVER work if conflicts can not be resolved.

I agree with you...the relationship is doomed unless we both get counseling on handling conflict. I will never slap him again...I am shocked by the way I couldn't control my anger and at least have th deceny to realize it's wrong. I feel barraded by some of these people that act like I enjoyed doing it and he deserved it....that is not the case. No one deserves it and I am sorry for it. So yes, IF we continue, there will be counseling, and if he leaves me again I'll let him go for good. And there won't be any "If I slap him again"....

[in.these.arms]

I would not have called him an abusive boyfriend. I would give him the benefit of the doubt given there was a genuine apology, and this was the first time. There is nothing wrong with forgiving someone for a mistake. If it continues, then of course, that's a BIGGER issue. As soon as someone hears that someone got slapped, it's like OMG, CALL THE POLICE....but everyone ignores the fact that there's emotional abuse attached. That is what I have gotten from him, and have touched on in my original post but once someone reads "I slapped him"....then I'm the ONLY guilty one. I don't understand why people can't see both sides.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

We can see both sides. He can't deal with you when you're acting irrational, so he leaves to let you cool off. You, who can't stand that he won't give you the attention you want during an argument and admit that you are right, completely lost control and escalated it from a verbal conflict to a physical one. YOU ARE THE ONLY GUILTY ONE.

[Sonrisa]

all of the men who have posted here are PUSSIES. women have always had the right to slap men when those get out of line. Men are animals and are not able to comprehend words or reason unless it gets physical.

take that a**hole!:

[doppelgaenger]

Yeah, and if you bitches would just stay in the kitchen where you belong, then everything would be all right.

[Sonrisa]

ughm...we do stay in the kitchen...and work to support your lazy asses...and clean....and do laundry....

and then get to hear your complaints on how we are too tired to have sex and satisfy you.

[vertical_sky]

People can't see both sides because there ARE NOT two sides to physical abuse.

You NEED to stop rationalizing your behavior. "But... but... he was emotionally abusive!"

It doesn't matter. That comment leads down the slippery slope to "But she MADE me hit her because she burned dinner!" There is NEVER an excuse to escalate an argument to physical confrontation. Repeat after me: never. NEVER. Yes, you feel guilty. Yes, you'll "never do it again." But the fact is you did it in the first place. You have already crossed that line. You need to make a serious commitment to therapy and exploring your own issues, separate of him. He did not make you hit him. You did that.

Yes, he has his own stuff to sort out. (Though I'm a little flummoxed by the whole "He packs all of his stuff".... When you say all of his stuff, what do you mean? He calls his buddies to move the couch? He takes his TV? Or does he pack as if he's going on an extended vacation?) But his issues are distinct from your reactions to them. His issues can cause you to be upset. His issues can cause you to be angry. These are feelings, and they are natural. No one is saying your feelings are incorrect.

But your ACTIONS are very inappropriate. You can be FURIOUS and still approach your partner in a respectful and loving way. His issues are what causes your feelings. But YOU are what caused your actions.

[Sonrisa]

sky, I honestly don't think that MOST men deserve a respectful and loving way if they act like a**holes in the first place.

[vertical_sky]

sky, I honestly don't think that MOST men deserve a respectful and loving way if they act like a**holes in the first place.

Guess I'm just quibbling about whether he was acting like an asshole. Maybe he thought he was doing the mature thing... Leaving for a period of time to cool down so it didn't escalate. Maybe he has his own anger issues and that's how he deals with them, by walking away for a night. That's why I'm wondering if he packed like he was going away for a short time, or like moving out for the long haul. Cause, honestly, COMPLETELY packing your stuff every single time you have a fight and then returning the next morning seems a little strange.

[MerryH]

You don't seem very understanding of people's issues and making mistakes. I don't think you should be giving advice. You are extremely hurtful and WAY to presumptuous instead of understanding. So thanks for nothing.

I really don't give a shit if I hurt your feelings. Abuse in any form is repulsive and I want you to understand that it's not okay. In one post, you say he didn't deserve it, but in the very next post, you say that there's emotional abuse there as if that makes it a little more okay for you to hit him. You're wrong.

You should learn how to control your anger with counseling (and also maybe learn why you want to be with someone who emotionally abuses you) before you pursue relationships with anyone.

[MerryH]

all of the men who have posted here are PUSSIES. women have always had the right to slap men when those get out of line. Men are animals and are not able to comprehend words or reason unless it gets physical.

This is ignorant and repulsive. I hope you can educate yourself about how terrible abuse can be.

[misombra]

just leave him alone and don't do it again. you can't be so clingy with guys. you have to let them fly like birds. run free like horses. you know?

slapping guys is not a good way of provoking them to stay with you. it actually has the opposite effect.
being nice and leaving them alone is a much better way.

[Sonrisa]

This is ignorant and repulsive. I hope you can educate yourself about how terrible abuse can be.

oh really? do men really understand or care when women try to share their feelings or express their emotions? NO

[misombra]

lmfao.

____________

[MerryH]

oh really? do men really understand or care when women try to share their feelings or express their emotions? NO

Sure. Many, many do. Making generalizations about an entire group of people is stupid. And men don't need to be hit to understand things. I would have thought you were joking, but I've seen you spew retarded shit like this many times before.