Puzzled and Lost, Need advice!!

[joebox]

Hello,

I am an 18 year old guy and have never been in a serious relationship and have never dated. I do not get nervous when it comes to women. I have maybe asked out 7 girls in my entire life and got no farther than a phone number which led no where. I have been depressed most of my life because I'm alone and have no one to be happy with which also causes me to have extreme anxitey. I see myself having low self esteem but I can sometimes hide it. I do not think I am ugly so that is not a problem.

OK my story,
I worked with this girl for a year an a half and we both enjoyed working together. I thought she was cute but she told me she had a fience so I didn't pursue any further. A couple months later I asked out another girl there and got shut down. I was friends with the girl I thought was cute until I quit the job early this year, nothing more than a co-worker though. She got married a couple months before (she is 19). Before I left I told her I still wanted to be friends and so she gave me her number and we hanged out a couple times outside of work. She left for the summer to go divorce her husband because she doesn't like him and he beat her (he is in another country and he cant come to the US).

I waited the whole summer for her to come back and one day at work she texted me saying she was back and she missed me. We hanged out a couple more times and all went good. One night I asked her where our relationship was going and she got really mad at me and we talked about it for about 3 hours, She said she was jelous that I asked out that other girl and not her because she had a crush on me. I told her I liked her alot and she said she was scared to date right now because the divorce is going really slow. She also got mad at me because I wasn't hugging her or holding her hand the first couple times. After that we cuddled and all seemed to be on track. We hanged out about 2 weeks ago before I left on a week trip. We cuddled all night and she said she forgived me and we planned a romantic trip next year. I touched her butt and she also said the next time we go out she wanted to pay for dinner. She said that she loved me.

I came back from my trip and texted her and now it seems like she ignores me, since we started hanging out I have always been the one to have to text/call her. Now I will text her and 3 days later I won't have an answer. I'll try to call her and she never picks up, it just keeps ringing, she doesn't even have a message machine.

I over think situations all the time and make them seem worse than they really are. I think about her all the time. On wed night I had my first anxiety attack and I texted her saying I wanted to talk about something important with her (the situation) she called me later that night and she seemed normal and told her I wanted to talk to her in person about it. She kept asking me if I was ok and I said I don't know (I was still under the attack so my voice was probably a little shaky and weird) She said she would check her schedual at work and text me later so we could meet up.

I texted her and called her yesterday once and no response. She never got backed to me about her schedual. I tried calling her and texting her today and no answer.

I'm stuck here, I really don't know what to do right now. I want to talk to her in person about this but it always seems like she is distanting her self from me.

I am really scared to lose her cause she is the coolest chick I have met and we have so much in common. I don't see myself being with anyone else and I don't even see another chick in the future.


What should I do about this?

I am probably just freaking out inside my mind but still why does she say she loves me but is so distant from me, we probably only hang out once every 2-3 weeks. I just want to be closer with her.


PLEASE HELP!!!

[MerryH]

I think you're too attached to a relationship that is still pretty much brand new and ill-defined. You've got to step back.

Apart from that, though, either she's not very interested in you, or she's just a huge flake. Flakes do not respect other people's feelings. She was also being very unreasonable when she got mad at you for asking someone else on a date and whatever other shit she got mad at you for. The point is that she is not as cool as you think she is. If things ever get serious with her, it will be a nightmare for you. Believe me. Just walk away. Stop calling her.