My name is Russell and I have a very complicated situation and pretty much desperate for help now
Im 21 years old,
Im easy going
Im 6ft tall
Down to earth aussie guy
And as far as feelings go, im a typical male that bottles it up inside of me and never lets it to the outside world....until now, because im desperate for help
I have a girlfriend Sarah (19 years old) for 5 years now, we share a rental house and are fully in love with each other...Everything is perfect appart from one big thing...
For the past 4 years now iv had a crush on her younger sister kayla (18 years old)
At first I just thought she was cute, but over the period of time iv found im more and more in love with her and think about her all the time
Just to set the record straight, I do NOT flirt with her, and she does not flirt with me, iv kept my feelings for her secret from her and absolutly everyone and never for a second exposed any hints or thoughts of liking her over the entire 4 years!
Iv completly kept it bottled inside of me. I would on average see her once a week, we get along well as friends
Its absolutly draining me!, Its draining my relationship with Sarah, I feel like my love for Kayla is so much stronger and getting stronger all the time, yet I feel helpless because I cant say anything to Kayla becuase im dating her sister and for such a long time now. And for that matter Kayla most likely doesnt even like me in any other way apart from a friend (No normal sister would bottle up feelings for their sisters boyfriend so I know she wouldnt like me that way obviosly)
I think the only option for me is to get over her...but iv tried
Iv gotten over previous girlfriends before no worries at all, like a water off a ducks back but I just cant get over Kayla (iv been trying for 2 years)
Iv tried so VERY hard to get over her, I tried not seeing her for a few months, It just didnt work, I still thought of her, and soon as I seen her again, all my feelings are all still there and strong!
I tried to convert my feelings of love into being just a friend/brother in law to be, but inside its still killing me
Its tearing me apart inside, Iv hit rock bottom
Its such a long long story, but thats the basics, does any one have any suggestions at all of what I can do?
In a dream world, I wish I could be with Kayla, Id do almost anything for it, but selfish it is, I dont want to leave Sarah because im afraid if I lose Sarah then I might lose Kayla, and ill do anything to still get to see her...messed up :/