Am I friendzoned? :(

[Lulu1987]

I met a guy at my gym about 1 month and half ago and we exchanged numbers.We are on the same age - 26 if that gives you a lil better look on the things. We don't see each other very often, only 1 or 2 a week during the weekend. He texted me few times asking me if I'm going to the gym. Last time he stayed 2 hours after his workout just to train me and show me some exercises , because I asked him for help. He seems trying to find an excuse to touch me when he show me exercises. Also he gave me a hug for goodbye and said "I'll see you next week in the gym" Also when I told him I have a guy roommate he was like" Ohhh, so you have a boyfriend now!" . I explained him that he's not a bf and just a roommate and friend . He ask me question how was my Fri night or my weekend and he told me alot of things about him. Problem is he still hasen't asked me out. I'm wondering why? Am I friend zoned or he just want to wait to get to know me better at the gym? I like this guy a lot...

[smackie9]

It's not the 1950's, it's ok for YOU to ask him out. Asking guys out is nothing new, I did it 25 years ago with a lot of sucess.

Ask him to join you for a coffee or go to a juice bar, sushi, whatever.

[Wakeup]

Yes ask him out. Just don't always be the one that does that. Its okay for you to ask first but don't be the only one doing all the asking after that.

[Lulu1987]

I really dont get an answer to my question here, am I in the friend zone or he likes more for more than just a friend?

[Wakeup]

How would we know? However: If you actually logic it out you would know for sure: You have to ask him out and if he goes on a date with you then he likes you for more then a friend. If he doesn't wan to go out on a date with you then you are friend zoned. Simple.

[smackie9]

He's not a mind reader either so maybe he is unsure too. That's how it usually works. If you like someone you say yes to a date yes? well it works both ways honey. Guys welcome the idea of being asked out. It doesn't mean you are going to come off as a slut or only have sexual intentions. Women need to get over that and start stepping up.

[TheEvilJester]

Without more details, we can't know for sure. It doesn't sound to me like you are friend-zoned, though. Some of the hints you mention sound more like he may be interested. Problem is, we can't know that without being closer to the situation. Could be he is only thinking of you as a friend. Could be he is trying to get up the nerve to ask you out. Only he knows for sure. As the others have said, feel free to ask him out. That will certainly shed some light on the situation.

[Wakeup]

Without more details, we can't know for sure. It doesn't sound to me like you are friend-zoned, though. Some of the hints you mention sound more like he may be interested. Problem is, we can't know that without being closer to the situation. Could be he is only thinking of you as a friend. Could be he is trying to get up the nerve to ask you out. Only he knows for sure. As the others have said, feel free to ask him out. That will certainly shed some light on the situation.

.... and another reason why all this being opposite sex friends blurs the lines between friendship and romantic intention. You "friends" are doing everything (except having sex with one another {unless its FWB or FB's}) that someone would do if romantically interested and you've blurred the lines to the point that every single day we get a thread like this from a young person who is "confused."

[Lulu1987]

I gave him a lot of hints that I like him... but sometimes when you like someone you see what you want to see. I thought maybe he likes me because of the way we met. I've noticed him looking at me at the gym and once I saw him lifting I just made a comment: " wow, that is heavy". Then he started talking to me asking me a lot of questions and said he noticed me before.Everything seemed to develop in a smooth way, but last time when he stayed with me 2 hours after his workout to show me exercises and train me, I asked him if he meets alot of people in the gym. He mentioned something that he thinks the gym is not a good place to meet women. I asked why and he said that is because usually women are too self -conseous about themselfs because they are not dressed up and all that. So I said that the clothes are not the most important thing... Anyway.. That comment made me think that he don't like me much. I'm so so confused... In the same time , I'm kinda old school... and prefer guys to ask me out first. Especially in this situation, I made the first move and started talking to him for first time. I feel like he has to put a lil effort too.
Any suggestions?

[AnErin]

Hmm, this guy is a weirdo.
He touches you, flirts, you give signals you like him and god damn near asked him out by saying "Do you meet many people from the gym" and he came off with "the gym is not a good place to meet women".
He is a tease. He knows how to put on the moves to get women interested but then rejects them.

He is not going to ask you out. He is just another flirtatious gym rat.
Your next move is this - ask him out. If he accepts, see where it goes but do NOT have sex for a few dates at least. If he rejects or says the gym is not a place for finding dates, then sever ties. You like this guy so why let him play with your feelings if he is just gonna tease?

[basilandthyme]

I really dont get an answer to my question here, am I in the friend zone or he likes more for more than just a friend?

Sorry, crystal ball is broken.

The only other way to find out is to ask him out and see what he says.

[smackie9]

If he hasn't asked you out by now, he's not excited enough to or he's a big jam tart. Who needs that, go cold on him and stop wasting your time.

Note***So what if someone says he does likes you....it still doesn't change the fact he hasn't, or won't ask you out. So what can you do if you won't ask him out yourself....nothing.

[TheEvilJester]

What is a jam tart?

[smackie9]

lol someone who is being a chicken, scared, has fear, unreliable.

- - - Updated - - -

Here is an example from urban dictionary :A lame person that leaves you hanging at the last minute by removing themselves from the plan.
Doug is not going to the strippers with us. He is a jam tart.

- - - Updated - - -

Another example is "jamming out" of a situation.

[Lulu1987]

alright.. I forgot to mentioned something that popped up in my mind yesterday. Last 2 saturdays we saw each other I was going out both times. First Sat I told him I gotta leave the gym around 7 cuz I have to meet up with my friends. On the next sat he asked me what I'm doing tonight and I said I have girls night out. Maybe that's the reason he hasn't asked me out. Maybe he wanted to, but I told him I was busy before he have the chance to ask me. Orrr maybe I think what I want to think lol
What you think guys?