if you guys are so broke, wud u let a girl pay for the bills durin a date?

[trisha]

alright

[megaton2002]

(Most of the) ORIENTAL guys like to to pick up the tab,that's how they were raised.(correct me if i am wrong).

[trisha]

Frasbee,

such a short reply, "Ah, i see",

just curious, you don't like Asians? am just assuming here...

[NBT]

I cannot seem to figure out why some guys would let a girl pay for a date, e.g. in the restaurant , resort or wherever...

As you said, your culture is different. So, you wouldn't.

Let me explain something to you, though.

This whole idea, that the only thing a woman has to do is sit down, eat, and look pretty, is nothing more than a FANTASY these days.

I know women LOOOOVE to have it BOTH ways (i.e. be independent when they WANT to, yet take it back to the 1950's the next minute) but no. Not gonna happen like that.

She & I are EQUAL PEOPLE. So where's the law that says *I* must be the one to always cough up the cash? Didn't we BOTH EAT? Ok then. It's crazy how all she has to do is do her hair and dress nicely and that's supposed to be the equivalent of splitting the bill.

Now, I'm not saying I'll NEVER pay. But I want her to know that it's ok to do the SAME for me on ANOTHER date.

[trisha]

NBT,

Things are changing, our culture is experiencing that change as well...it's not yet written in the book, i guess, but the changes are so obvious now...

i'm not just used to it, but i'm learning....

i'm accepting the fact now that i should also do my share when it comes to financial matters during a date...

My mentality toward this "who shud pay?" thingy was influenced by my 2 years relationship with a guy who did not want me to pay over anything, so for 2 years, i was not paying anything when we're dating...

That 2 year bf of mine was a HISTORY now since we broke up already -----here comes the new guy, too different from my Ex, he would let me pay....

maybe, I'm not used to it, but I'm willing to embrace the CHANGE.

[Sonrisa]

As you said, your culture is different. So, you wouldn't.

Let me explain something to you, though.

This whole idea, that the only thing a woman has to do is sit down, eat, and look pretty, is nothing more than a FANTASY these days.

I know women LOOOOVE to have it BOTH ways (i.e. be independent when they WANT to, yet take it back to the 1950's the next minute) but no. Not gonna happen like that.

She & I are EQUAL PEOPLE. So where's the law that says *I* must be the one to always cough up the cash? Didn't we BOTH EAT? Ok then. It's crazy how all she has to do is do her hair and dress nicely and that's supposed to be the equivalent of splitting the bill.

Now, I'm not saying I'll NEVER pay. But I want her to know that it's ok to do the SAME for me on ANOTHER date.

what about have menstruation? UTIs? yeast infections? being pregnant for 9 months? giving birth? having guys cheat when you don't look pretty enough? getting plastic boobs and fake noses just to satisfy guys? getting waxed, lasered, shaved...getting paid a lot less for the same job...

[lovesjoyajm]

what about have menstruation? UTIs? yeast infections? being pregnant for 9 months? giving birth? having guys cheat when you don't look pretty enough? getting plastic boobs and fake noses just to satisfy guys? getting waxed, lasered, shaved...getting paid a lot less for the same job...

WHAT are you talking about????

[Rollerderby]

I don't think it's unreasonable for a girl to want to be treated well by her man. But I think the problem is that too many people place MONEY as the only signifier of care. If I had a guy who was broke, but went out of his way all the time to show me how much he cared, it wouldn't bother me.

I feel weird if the guy always pays, it makes me feel bought. I'm independent enough that I can carry my own way, and yes treat. But it should be equal, and if it's in the beginning, the guy will look better if he can take care of the girl. That doesn't mean he should be mr. moneybags for their entire relationship. It throws the power dynamic off.

[Illusional]

so Mr. Illusional, if you allow her to pay, does it mean you dont like her that much coz u dont care what shed gonna think about you after she paid the bill?

u dont care even if she'll think that ur such a user?

haha honestly if she thought that i was a loser, then she wouldn't have came out in the first place.

by your tone i'm going to guess that you already got burnt.. whose fault in that?

put all the blaming aside, "I" personally wouldn't let a girl pay for me, however, if she asked me out and put up a fight, then i'd put my pride on the side and let her pay. i've already gotten into numerous fights with a girl that i was trying to date over me not letting her pay.

you see, when a girl offers to pay, she doesn't think that the guy is a loser,.. she is being sincere.

getting back to your question, just because i let a girl pay doesn't mean that i don't like her. i find her more independent because she seems to be more financially stable and of course she isn't a damn gold digger.

raverboy

[Illusional]

i'm a japanese but i was raised in the philippines

getting back to the paying situation... i can tell that you weren't raise in japan because these days are quiet different from the past. sure, men still do pay for most of the outings, but more so women are stepping up to the plate and meeting men half way, if not more.

i'm half japanese and i am raised in hawaii for that matter.

raverboy

[trisha]

illusional,

yep, i'm a japanese but i havent been in japan, i was here in the Philippines all my life, exactly 23 years ...

[Illusional]

so i'm wondering why did you bring the ethinicty factor into it if you were raised in a different country..??

raverboy

[trisha]

it's the Filipino culture that I'm pointing out...

[Illusional]

oh.... i didn't catch that because you stated that you were a japanese person living in the philipines....i see now.

so why did you or your parents move there??

raverboy

[trisha]

illusional,


my grandparents has business here, they're both dead now, my father, their only kid , who also grew up here , is the one managing the business...My father fell in love with my mom who is half-Filipina, half-japanese, that's it, i'm their kid...

so i think it's safer to say that I'm a Filipina by heart but a japanese by blood...